Down on my Knees
by CJ
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: 1 Series: Joss owns these great characters, me well I just had to borrow
them a bit no harm done, no money made. Just me trying not to have my
head explode by keeping it in.
2 Song: I used is: Down on my knees by Susan Ashton. Whom I must say has
one of the greatest voices I've ever heard.
3 Story: The story is mine, my weird piece of gray matter thought it up
so please let me know what you think of it, and if you think it is worth
posting any where please do inform me first. So I can do snoopy dance
<g>.
4 Sex: well non really, though I do believe in a stronger connection
between Buffy and Faith than the show portrayed <g>. So if you have a
problem with that, maybe you should still read, unless you really don't
want to or if it's illegal where you live.
Reverberating steps could be heard as the brunette walked passed several occupied cells. Steps that fell in time with her heartbeat. Slow and steady, without a single fluttering skip, the sound droned out everything around her. Her face a blank image to any one around who could see it, while behind it there waged a multitude of emotions. She'd been in here for, the better part of a year and finally started to do a little better. Though she did have her extreme low moments now and then, this was one of those low ones.
Her letters to Buffy had been returned, returned unopened. Unopened and un-read to be exact. It had made her decide to come to a different way to be forgiven, a different way to repent. It was something she hadn't done in a long, long while. And definitely something she hadn't expected to be doing again. But this was the time for it, her time to do it again and feel good again, feel better. So instead of wasting time by pacing back and forth in front of the double doors Faith made a determent move and walked, head held high, in to the modest church.
Passing the wooden doors, she was suddenly engulfed by a warm and bright light. A light that came through a splendid, multi colored stained glass on the far end of the pew filled room. Her steps upon entering had turned from the heavy footfalls they were to an insecure and careful tread. This was how she walked all the way up to the front where she stood gazing to the glass stained window featuring some religious happening. Faith had never paid any real attention in Sunday school so she couldn't quite recall what was being portrayed here.
Standing there, embraced by an ethereal light, Faith slowly and gracefully knelt to her knees. And before she dropped her head to her chest or closed her eyes she whispered a single soulful plea to the one who could not of yet forgive her.
"I hope one day B, you'll be as merciful as He. I'll redeem myself any way I can, for you."
With this she bent her head in respect, for the only thing she ever had had respect for, and fell into a clear and harmonious prayer.
// I've got sins that need eviction from a temple that is a wreck. I've got a chain of contradiction hanging around my neck So I go down, I go down, down. I go down on my knees. I feel the bitter winds grow colder, they are dancing with my pride. I've got a chip on my shoulder, Bigger than a mountainside. These claws of human nature, Hold me tight within their clasp. I'm not worthy of forgiveness, but I'll just have to ask So I go down, I go down, down. I go down on my knees. Feed my hunger, slave my thirst. For a spiritual rebirth Light my darkness Move in me Make me more than what you see As I go down on my knees. //