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Who You Are

by Davids21
Rating: R

Disclaimer: Joss owns the characters. I am merely taking them for a spin.
Spoilers: End of season 5 and wild speculation.
Author's Notes: This is the finale of this arc. I am going to start on a different story next unless someone wants some tales from this world. The song is ‘Innocent’ by Fuel. < > = means that Buffy and Faith are using their connection. ** = means regular thoughts. >< = means flashback.
Thanks: Once again to Sasha for making Slayer Pride and writing 'A whole new Scene'. Without that story I never would have wrote this. Thanks to Sway for giving crazy support and being my biggest cheerleader. Thanks to Nikita for the detailed feedback and the support. Dacia, sorry I left your name out. You have helped in ways you can’t imagine.

/Buffy stood there and watched as Faith backed up to the edge of the roof. The wound in her side was deep and she was looking too good. The dark haired slayer smiled and climbed onto the ledge. She looked down at her side and touched it. Her hand was covered in her own blood.

Buffy moved towards her. “Faith, I didn’t know what else…”

Faith held her hand up motioning for Buffy not to come any further. “Come on, B. Sooner or later, you knew this was gonna happen.”

Then she fell./


Buffy sat up sharply as Angel’s car rolled over another bump. She had fallen asleep soon after they had got on the road. Wesley and Angel were riding in the front seat. Cordelia was sitting in the back with her. The sky was still overcast and dreary which kind of reflected Buffy’s mood.

Faith was going after Dawn. Which proved just how far-gone she was from being her old self. The Faith she knew would never try to hurt Dawn but Faith wasn’t the same anymore. She had changed. And it was her fault.

If she hadn’t let herself lose control, then Faith would have never been brought back to life. And as unfair as it sounded, maybe that was the way it should have been all along. Both slayers had died and been brought back. But why? For what higher purpose?

Buffy closed her eyes tightly. She wasn’t going to let herself cry again. And no matter what Angel had told her, Faith was her problem. Her responsibility. She had had to deal with it. She looked up the cloudy sky above and remembered the last time she and Faith were on this road.

>“Do we have to go back?” Faith groaned from the passenger seat of the car.

“Yes. I haven’t seen my sister in a week and I can’t wait to see her.” Buffy replied. “Besides, she has a new big sister to get re-acquainted with.”

“So, she’s my sister too? Always wanted one.” Faith said as she playful punched Buffy in the arm.

Buffy smiled. “Faith, I need to ask you something.”

“What is it?” Faith shifted in her seat so she was looking at Buffy. The blonde slayer looked a little sad. “B. What’s wrong?”

“If something should ever happen to me…I need to know that…”

Faith put her hand on Buffy’s and whispered “I’ll protect her with my life.”<

Faith’s words continued to echo in her mind. Now she was going to kill her little sister. And if Faith was acting like she was when she with the mayor, then nothing short of killing the dark slayer would stop her. Could she choose between her sister and the woman she loved?

	//Satan, you know where I lie
	Gently I go into that good night//

Angel turned around and looked at Buffy. His face was asking her if she was ok? Buffy nodded. This was her life. No matter how much she hated it, it was her.


Faith kicked open the door of her old apartment. She dropped Dawn on the floor and walked around. It felt good to be back here. This place was her home. And this was where it all was going to end. This dance she and Buffy had been having since they first met was getting old. She couldn’t move on with her life until she finished things once and for all.

She looked at her bandage hand. The blood had almost completely soaked through. Faith couldn’t stop staring at it. Then, as before, she felt as if her mind was being invaded. She ran into the bathroom and shut the door.

Her head was pounding. She turned on the faucet and splashed some water on her face. The pain became even sharper. Faith opened her eyes and looked in the mirror. It was her reflection self again.

“You’re losing it, aren’t ya?” the reflection laughed.

Faith staggered back. It felt like someone had her head in a vise. “Fucking stop it!”

The reflection laughed again. “You just aren’t getting are you? You locked me up so now I can fuck with you just like you fucked with me. You should just give it up, girlie.”

Faith drove her bandaged hand through the mirror. The glass shattered and fell to the floor. She dropped down on her knees. The pain became even stronger. It felt like she was dying. It was too much.

“If you don’t stop this right now, I swear to God that I will go out there and kill that little bitch right now.” She growled. The pain again intensified causing Faith to fall on her back. Blood slowly trickled from her nose. “Stop it or I’ll kill her. I mean it.”

And just as suddenly as it started, the pain stopped. Faith slowly sat from her spot on the floor. She laughed slightly as she wiped the blood from her nose. She was going to have to find a way to end this conflict within herself. She would to take away the one thing that made her inner self fight.

“I’m gonna kill Buffy and then, I’m gonna kill her sister."


Cordelia turned and tapped Buffy on the shoulder. No matter how she felt about Faith, she needed to fix things with Buffy.

The slayer turned and looked back at her. “Yes.”

Cordelia took a deep breath. Apologizing was never one of her strong points. “Look, I know we haven’t ever been that close but I just wanted to tell you that I never meant for any of that to happen. No matter what was wrong with Faith at the time I should have respected the relationship that you have and I am sorry.”

Buffy turned away from Cordelia. “I’m glad you're sorry.”

“So, do you forgive me?”

The slayer turned around so she was facing Cordelia. “No. I don’t. I might one day but for now I think it would be best if you didn’t speak to me at all.”

Cordy turned back and looked out of the window. “At least, I tried.”


	//Search for pleasures overrated
	Never armed our souls 
	All our lives get complicated//

Buffy watched as a familiar sign passed the car. It said ‘Welcome to Sunnydale’. They were here. Now what? How could she bring Faith back? She leaned back in seat and took a deep breath. There was only person she could ask now. Only thing was she wasn’t too sure she wanted to hear the answer.

Wesley pulled the car over. “Buffy, where do you want us to start looking?”

Buffy sat up in her seat and went into leader mode. “Wesley, you take Cordelia and go get the others. Check at the school, the mall everywhere. If you find her, call me on my cell phone. Angel and I will check the cemeteries and anywhere else.”

Wesley nodded. “Good plan. We’ll meet at the magic shop in two hours then.”

Angel and Buffy climbed out the car and watched Wesley and Cordy drive off. The pair stood there until the car was out of sight. Then Angel spoke.

“You know they won’t find her.”

The slayer nodded. “I know. But there is something I gotta do before we go and fight her.”

“What is it?”

“I have to visit an old friend.”


Dawn slowly opened her eyes. Her head felt like crap. She tried to move her arms but she couldn’t. They were tied to a chair.

“Who’s there?” She said when she heard the sound of boots walking across the floor. There was someone here with her. Dawn frantically looked around. Then she saw someone step from the shadows.

“Hey, D.”

Dawn looked and saw the dark slayer standing in front of her. “What is wrong with you? Why did you hit me?”

“Because lil’ Dawnie I needed to give your sister a reason to come after me.” Faith said as she lit a cigarette.

“Why are you acting like this? I thought you loved me?”

“You see, D, this is the way I have always been. You and your big sis were just holding me back. This is my world now. My rules. And according to my rules, this is the part where I kill you and then I kill Buffy.”

Dawn shook her head. “You're not Faith.”

“Excuse me?”

“The Faith I know cares about people. And there are people who love her back. The Faith I know would never try and hurt me or Buffy. So, you may have Faith’s body but you aren’t her.”

The words chilled Faith to her soul. Was she the real Faith? Faith took another drag off of her smoke. “What the fuck do you know? You're just a kid.”

“I know that somewhere inside of you, you still care about me and Buffy. I know that you don’t really want to hurt us.”

Faith walked up to Dawn and backhanded her across the face. “You almost had me there, kid. I am the only Faith here now. And the sooner you accept that,” Faith lifted Dawn’s face to hers. “The better.”

Faith left Dawn sitting in the chair crying and with her slayer hearing she heard the girl whisper something. “I hope Buffy kills you.”

	//For what the future would hold
	When we were innocent//

Faith blew some smoke out into the air. She turned around and looked at Dawn. Faith smiled at her. “She can try.”


Buffy folded her arms and stared at Lucy. “How could you let this happen?”

“It wasn’t my fault. The blame rests on no one.” Lucy answered as the two walked down the Ghostroads.

“But you let them change her. You let it happen.”

Lucy turned and faced Buffy. “Faith knew the risks involved. I told her this could happen. She didn’t care. All she wanted was for you to be safe. Her love for you truly knows no bounds.” Lucy put her hand on Buffy’s shoulder. “Besides, wouldn’t you have done the same for her?”

Buffy turned her head. Lucy was right. No matter what she had to find a way to get Faith back. “So, how do I fix this?”

“You can’t.”

“She has my sister. There has to be a way to stop her.”

“The only thing that can stop Faith now is herself.”

“Tell me how.”

Lucy stepped back from the slayer. “If Faith doesn’t find a way to merge her personalities back together, she’ll tear her mind apart. And then there would be no chance of saving her.”

“Again. Tell me how she is supposed to do this.”

“The answer will come to you. I can only tell you this one thing.”

“Which is?”

“Balance comes with acceptance of who you are and of what you used to be.”

And with that Lucy starting glowing bright white. “Good luck Buffy.”


Faith stood out on the rooftop and looked over the city. The clouds had broken just enough so you could see the sun slowly drift down past the horizon. She smiled. Now it was time to finish this.

Faith closed her eyes. <Buffy. You should know where I am. Come and get it.>

Buffy woke up in Angel’s arms. The vampire smiled at her. He helped Buffy to her feet. “So what did your friend say?”

“The usual cryptic stuff.” Buffy put her hand on her forehead as she felt a presence in her mind.

“What is it?”

“Faith. I know where she is.” Buffy took off running in the direction of Faith’s old apartment.


Wesley called for Dawn as he and Cordelia walked through the mall. Willow and the others were checking around town for her as well.

“You know we aren’t going to find her here.” Cordelia said as she took another sip of her drink.

“That’s rather counterproductive don’t you think? Buffy and Angel said they needed our help so this is what we are doing.” Wesley answered.

“But Faith has always been their pet project so of course they wanted to get everyone else out of the way so they could handle her.”

Wesley took his glasses off and cleaned them. “Or perhaps they were afraid that you would try and bugger Faith again.”

The former watcher walked off leaving Cordelia standing there. “I said I was sorry. Geez.”


The door to the apartment shattered as Buffy slammed a punch into it. The slayer slowly walked inside. The apartment was fairly dark and Buffy couldn’t really see anything.

“Dawnie? Are you here?” she whispered. There wasn’t answer. Then the lights flashed on. There in front of her stood Faith who was standing behind Dawn.

	//Angels lend me your might
	Forfeit all my lives to
	Get just one right//

“Hey B. Glad you could make it.” Faith said as she lit herself another cigarette.

“What did you do to her?” Buffy said. Her sister was hunched over in the chair but she looked like she was still breathing.

“Aww, me and D were just having some girl talk.”

“Let her go Faith.”

“Naah. I think she should stay.” Faith walked in front of Dawn. Her eyes trailed up and down Buffy. “I hate to sound like a broken record but are you sure you’re ready for this? Because the only way she leaves here is if I’m in a body bag.”

Buffy began moving towards Faith. Everything inside of her screamed for to grab Faith by the head and punch her until she was back to normal. Unfortunately that wasn’t going to work. “Faith, I know you are in there. You have to find a way to beat her. I know you can do this.”

Faith shook her head. “Sorry, Buffy. It ain’t gonna happen. This is my body now. Not hers.”

Buffy continued moving towards the dark slayer. “No. You are just tearing yourself apart. Can’t you see that?”

Faith stepped back. “Shut up. You get away from me.”

“I told you before I’m letting you go. I mean it. I need you Faith. I need you. Dawn needs you. You can do this. Come back to me.” Buffy stopped in front of Faith and hugged her.

“In my dream you said never let go of your heart. I know you are there. Come back. Please.” The tears slowly rolled down Buffy’s face. She pulled back the hug and looked at Faith.

The dark slayer looked a bit distant. Buffy stroked the side of her face. “Faith? Are you there.”

Faith looked at Buffy and then suddenly pulled out a knife and drove it into the blonde’s side. Buffy fell to the floor as Faith pulled the knife out of her side.

	//All those colors long since faded
	All our smiles all confiscated
	Never were we told 
	We'd be bought and sold
	When we were innocent//

“There. A scar for a scar. I know you didn’t think that was going to work. So, now what are you gonna do, B?” Faith said as she stalked closer to Buffy.

Buffy slowly stood up. “Improvise.”

Suddenly, Angel came crashing into the room from the window. Faith ran at him and started throwing a flurry of punches at the vampire. Angel blocked them and began throwing punches of his own. Faith caught one of his punches. Angel looked and saw that Faith’s eyes were glowing.

“New game, deadboy.” Faith spun him around and tossed him out the window. She quickly followed after him.


Buffy slowly walked over to Dawn. The bleeding was slowing thanks to her healing powers. She kneeled in front of her sister and started untying her.

“B-Buffy? Is that you?”

Buffy looked up and saw that her sister had finally came to. “Yeah. I’ll you loose in a sec.”

“Why is Faith acting like a psycho?”

Buffy got the last rope free and helped Dawn stand up. “She just going through something right now. Don’t worry about it. I’ll fix her. Now get out of here and go to the magic shop.”

“What about you?”

“Just go.”

Dawn ran out of the apartment and Buffy looked out of the broken window. Faith was tossing Angel like a ragdoll. She wasn’t too sure how much more of this he could take. Then suddenly she knew what she had to do.

“Acceptance.” She closed her eyes and then fell to the floor.


Faith drove another kick into Angel’s midsection. He fell to the ground and started gasping for air. Faith grabbed him and threw him across the roof. The vampire slowly stood up as Faith dropkicked him to the ground again.

“You know deadboy, I get the feeling that you aren’t giving this the effort it deserves.” Faith said as she walked over to Angel.

“Now why would you say that?” Angel rushed Faith and connected with three shots to her midsection and one to her head. The slayer spun around from the last punch and fell down.

Faith tried to get up but she felt a tugging in her mind. Then she lost consciousness.


Faith slowly got up the floor and saw where she was. It was the room she and Buffy shared. Then she heard a groan from the other side of the room. It was her reflection self.

“What are you doing here?” Faith said.

“What are you doing here?” The other Faith answered. “Oh my god look.”

The two looked down on the bed and saw yet another Faith lying on the bed. She appeared to be in a coma.

“Ok this is getting really fucking stupid.” Faith sat on the bed and looked at herself. “Is that me?”


Faith turned and saw Buffy standing there. “I don’t get it B.”

“Me either.” ‘Faith’ said as she lit a cigarette.

Buffy walked over to the bed. “You two are both Faith. But you are just fragments of her personality. Without you she’ll never wake up. And if you keep on fighting one other you’ll just end killing each other.”

Buffy ran her fingers through the comatose Faith’s hair. “I need you back. I know neither one of you wants to do this but I need you both to accept that you have changed. You aren’t a cold-blooded killer or a scared little girl. You are Faith. Good, bad, scared, brave. That’s what makes you you.”

The raven-haired girls looked at each other. Then they noticed that they both were dressed the same. They were the same person. Nothing could ever change that. They nodded at each other and sat down on the bed. Buffy took both of the hands and smiled.

“Balance leads to acceptance.” She whispered and then there was a bright flash of light.

Buffy’s eyes fluttered open. She had pulled Faith into her mind. But did it work? As she stood up her slayer hearing picked on someone whispering her name. It was coming from outside where Faith and Angel were.

Buffy walked over to the window and slowly climbed out to the rooftop. Her side was still on fire but it was healing. She looked at Angel who nodded and went back inside. Buffy kneeled next to Faith.

“B-Buffy…” Faith groaned as she sat up.

The blonde smiled at her. “Hey you.”

“Ow. My head feels like shit. What happened?”

“Your personality fragmented so I used my mind to put you back together.”

Faith smiled. “Good. Just wanted to be sure.”

Buffy ran her fingers through Faith’s hair. “I need you to tell me something.”

Faith smiled. <I love you, Buffy. Thanks for saving me.>

Buffy pulled Faith into an embrace. <I love you too.>

The slayers sat there on the roof for awhile. Not ready to go back to the real world just yet. They looked up at the stars and silently thanked God for letting them find each other once again.

	//This prayer is for me tonight
	This far down that line and
	Still ain't got it right
	And while confessions not yet stated
	Our next sin is contemplated
	Never did we know
	What the future would hold
	Or that we'd be
	Bought and sold
	We were innocent//

...continued in Unemployed...