Working Towards A New Beginning
by Faithful_14
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy or Faith; they belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant
Enemy, Fox, and whoever else. I'm just simply borrowing them. I promise to
put them back when I'm done.
Author's Notes: The song is by Sarah McLachlan and it's called Angel. And *****
separates lyrics from the story. Oh and it sorta goes back and forth between POVs.
Well sorta...you'll see. *indicates thoughts*
Thanks: To my beta, Krizia.
Feedback: Is a must!
Faith sat alone in the her dark, dingy cell. Night was beginning to fall over the high security prison, and the dark slayer was relieved. The night was where she belonged, even if she couldn't go out in it. She had been doing a lot of thinking lately, and she was beginning to depress herself further. So to take her mind off things she grabbed her small radio. It had been given to her on account of her good behavior; she was grateful for it. She flipped the switch and began to search for a good station. She found a song that caught her attention.
Meanwhile in Sunnydale, Buffy Summers was getting ready to head out and patrol. It was totally silent in the house and it unnerved her. So she switched on her radio. For some reason this particular song caught her attention so she stopped and listened.
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance for a break that would make it ok there's always one reason to feel not good enough and it's hard at the end of the day I need some distraction oh beautiful release memory seeps from my veins let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight
It scared Faith how true those lyrics rang to her. Throughout her time in prison she wished for a second chance. To make it up to Angel, Red, Xander, everyone she hurt while she was in Sunnydale. But Buffy especially. She hurt her the most out of everyone and she didn't have a good reason for it either. But it was out of jealousy. Buffy had everything Faith wished for herself. Friends, family, a future... Also because she always felt so shut out. Never a part of Scooby meetings, never accepted, and the list goes on. Faith had found the one person on earth who could understand the burden a slayer carried. The one person she loved. And Buffy shut her out. That's what hurt the dark slayer the most, so she hurt Buffy right back. It's what she was good at; finding peoples weaknesses and exploiting them. Of course none of these excuses were reasons, could never make up for the past. All Faith wanted was a chance to make it right, to be forgiven. She didn't expect forgiveness but it's what she needed most, despite the impossibility of it.
In the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold motel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of an angel may you find some comfort there
As soon as Buffy heard the song she instantly thought of Faith. The song's relevance to her dark counter part gave her insight to how she must feel. She too wished for that second chance. She should have been there for Faith, should have been that angel. But she was too wrapped up in herself to realize what Faith was going through. Buffy tried to help but never really tried. She regretted what she said to the brunette slayer that night in LA on Angel's roof. If she hadn't been so blinded by the rage and hate she felt for the other girl maybe things could have turned out differently. She would never forget how Faith hurt her. But she knew, given time, forgiveness might be possible. If only she would admit that to the Scoobies, but more importantly to Faith.
So tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn there's vultures and thieves at your back and the storm keeps on twisting you keep on building that lie that made up for all you lack it don't make no difference escaping one last time it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
Oh how true it all was. Faith's time in Sunnydale had been nothing but a struggle to stay on the good side. Everywhere she turned she only found hopelessness. And she eventually lost her battle for good. She told herself lies to keep from having to cope, from having to feel emotion. She said she didn't care she killed Allan Finch but that was just another lie. The guilt and the pain she felt were hard to bear. But the 'bad girl' facade she put up wouldn't let anyone past, wouldn't let anyone help. Wouldn't let Buffy and Angel help to be more specific. It was easier to live in the lie she had created. The lie that no one cared, that she was evil, that she could never be good enough... The utter regret and sorrow it brought her because of those lies ate away at her entire being.
In the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold motel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of an angel may you find some comfort there... you're in the arms of an angel... may you find some comfort here
As the final chords of the song faded away 'The Chosen Two' silently wept. Wept for all the things they realized they could have done to avoid so many things, so many wrongs. Once they accepted these things they felt their 'slayer bond' grow stronger. Even though one slayer was in 'The City Of Angels' and the other was in Sunnydale, they knew all their mistakes could be forgiven.
Buffy began packing her bag for the journey to Los Angeles she'd embark on tonight. She shut her radio off silently thanking whoever was responsible for the song, and making her see the light.
Faith dried her tears and shut the radio off. For she knew now with her second chance, her 'angel', there was hope for her after all.
When Buffy was finished packing her bag she went downstairs and wrote her mother a note. Joyce had gone to an art show and would be gone for a while. Which Buffy felt was good because she knew her mom would protest to this journey.
She took the money she'd saved up for an emergency and shoved it in her bag. Then she fished out a piece of paper with Angel's phone number on it and she dialed it.
"Angel Investigations. We help the hopeless," Cordy's voice droned on the other end. "Cordelia, it's Buffy. Is Angel there?"
"Yeah, sure, hang on a minute."
She heard muffled speaking and then the worried voice of her ex-boyfriend. "Buffy, is everything okay?"
She let out a deep breath, "Yeah. Everything is fine. I'm coming to LA tonight and I need to ask you a favor."
"Anything. But why are you coming here?" he asked.
"I need to see Faith, but I don't have time to explain. I need a place to stay and a ride from the bus station."
"Okay."
"Thanks. I'll call you when I get there," and she hung up before he could say anything else. She didn't want to go into a discussion on the phone so she kept it short.
Then she called Giles and told him she'd be away for a few days, not to worry. He began to protest but she hung up on him. Buffy knew it was rude but she didn't have time to argue.
So after double checking that she had everything she needed, Buffy began her walk towards the bus station. When she got there she got lucky and caught the last bus to LA that night. The bus was almost empty except for her and two others. This was going to be a long ride.
*I have to explain to Angel what I'm doing in LA. But what do I tell him? How about the truth? Well as weird as the truth sounds it's all I've got...The truth it is then.* Once she figured out what to tell the vampire with a soul she had plenty of time to think about what she would say to Faith. But that was going to prove to be much more difficult.
When Buffy finally arrived in LA she found a pay phone and called Angel and told him where to pick her up. She stood outside for fifteen minutes before he came and then she got into his convertible. "Hi," she said awkwardly, not knowing what else to say. "Hi, it's good to see you," he greeted. She smiled at him and nodded and then he drove off.
When they got to the Hyperion they went inside and Angel took a seat on a couch and Buffy followed suit. The blonde slayer looked around, confused, "Where's Wesley and Cordelia?" "I gave them the night off," the brooding vampire replied. "Oh. Well I suppose you want to know why I came to see Faith, huh?" Buffy began. Angel simply nodded. "I don't really know how else to explain it. Earlier I was getting ready for patrol and I turned the radio on. This song caught my attention. And as I listened it described Faith perfectly. And it made me realize a lot of things. But I knew deep down she was hearing it too. And I know that we both understand that our mistakes can be forgiven. Is this making any sense?"
Angel nodded, and motioned for her to continue. The vampire's silence was beginning to freak her out but she continued, "I need to see her. We need to talk, I can't just ignore what happened. And I think I can help her," she said sincerely.
Angel rested his elbows on his knees, "Buffy, do you really think seeing Faith is wise?" The slayer knew he was only looking out for Faith's well-being but she was starting to get annoyed. So she nodded. "Okay, then tomorrow I'll take you to the prison. But know that she's being paroled in three weeks. And I guess that's all you need to know," the vampire with a soul stood up.
"I'm not here to hurt her, Angel, you know that," Buffy stood as well, knowing her ex-boyfriend wasn't happy about this. "I know. But you two have a lot of unresolved issues and I'm worried about the two of you, that's all. But it's not because I don't trust you," he said while locking eyes with Buffy. "How is she?" the slayer asked, rather out of the blue. "She's doing very well. I really think she has a shot. Oh, and you can pick any room to sleep in," he added.
"Thanks, Angel," she grabbed her bag. He smiled, "You're welcome. G'night, Buffy." She smiled back at him and then went to find herself a room.
Once she did she threw her stuff down and collapsed on the bed. Seeing Angel was always hard for her but she knew that seeing Faith was going to be even harder. They hadn't seen each other in over a year, and the last time they did Buffy threatened to beat Faith to death. *This is not going to be easy but there's no backing down now...* The blonde slayer put a pair of pajamas on and slipped into bed.
Tomorrow was going to be very interesting.
When Buffy finally woke up she glanced at the clock. It was 4 p.m! She never slept this late but she guessed it was because she stayed up later than normal. And the gist of it was because she was so stressed out about seeing Faith.
She rubbed her tired eyes and got out of bed to take a shower, a cold shower.
Once she was dressed and ready she went downstairs to the lobby. There she found Wesley and Cordelia working and Angel reading the paper. "Hey..." Buffy greeted them quietly. "Buffy, it's good to see you again," Wes said cheerily. "Yeah, it's been a while," Cordy added with a smile.
The slayer smiled back and looked to Angel. "So when are visiting hours?" she asked with a hint of nervousness in her tone. "Today they're from three o'clock to eight." Buffy took a deep breath, "Then let's go."
"Um, Buffy, take a look outside," Cordelia pointed out. The sun had yet to go down. "Oops. Sorry 'bout that..." the blonde slayer mumbled.
"You okay?" Angel asked her, concerned. "Oh, yeah, why would I not be?" Buffy fumbled, fiddling with her hands. "You seem kind of tense. Are you scared about seeing Faith?" She only nodded and sat down next to her ex. "I'm sure if you're honest with her and just tell you how you feel, everything will be okay," he tried to assure her.
Buffy was extremely confused. *What does he mean by tell her how you feel?* She was just about to say something when the phone rang. "Angel, the phone's for you," Cordelia interrupted her. He got up and answered it.
When he hung up he grabbed his coat, "Sorry, Buffy, it's an emergency," he looked to Wesley, "Gunn's in trouble. You have to drive," he put the coat over his head so he wouldn't get burned by the setting sun. Wesley nodded and grabbed the keys and they headed for the door.
"Hey, wait, what about me?" Buffy asked. Angel stopped just before they left, "Cordy can give you the directions. And you can take my car," he tossed her the keys and left.
Buffy turned to look at Cordelia. The actress held up a piece of paper, "Here's the directions. And if you wanted to know they took Wesley's motorcycle so you could take the car," she spoke without even looking up from her computer. "Oookay, but isn't he going to get burned?" Buffy get up and took the directions from Cordy. "No, the sun's almost set anyway, besides he's got a blanket to cover himself."
Buffy couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Angel riding on a motorcycle behind Wesley with a blanket over him, it was just too weird. "Thanks. I'm gonna get going then," the blonde slayer stated and left to go to the prison.
It took her almost a half an hour to reach the penitentiary and when she went inside she was checked in as a visitor and taken to a room full of booths. She was sat down at number seventeen and was told to wait.
She was really nervous, but she didn't exactly know why. She felt hours went by while she waited for Faith to appear. But when she did, Faith's eyes went wide. *God, I thought Dead Boy was gonna be here...oh shit...*
Buffy hesitantly picked up the phone and Faith did the same. "Hi," the blonde said meekly as she watched her sister-in-slayage through the thick glass. "Hey...so what brings you here?"
"I think you know, Faith."
The brunette gulped, she wasn't ready for this. She wasn't ready to be let out, she didn't want to be let out. She wasn't ready to face the world after all she'd done. *Fuck, I can't do this*
"I forgive you," Buffy said as she locked eyes with her counter part. Faith's jaw hit the floor then. "Why, B? Why forgive me?" she asked looking away from the blonde's penetrating gaze. "I know you heard that song last night. The better question is, will you forgive me?" Faith knew she couldn't play dumb anymore and it was futile to fight with Buffy. Besides, she was done fighting with her.
Faith let out a breath she was holding, "B, I can't. I can't do this. You don't need to be forgiven. I made the mistakes, I brought it all upon myself. I'm being let out in less than two weeks and I don't want to. I'm not ready..." she trailed off, trying to hide the tears that threatened to spill.
Buffy felt her heart break when she heard what the brunette was saying. "Faith, yes you can. I know it, you're strong. And we both made mistakes, mistakes that can be forgiven. Let me help you, let me in." The blonde slayer just wanted to hold Faith right now and make it all okay. But with the damn glass wall it was impossible.
"Wait, did you say you get out in less than two weeks?" Buffy asked, perplexed. Faith brought up her tear filled eyes to Buffy and nodded. "Angel told me three weeks," the blonde slayer said. The brunette chuckled a little, "Soul-boy was never good with dates," she wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Will you come back to Sunnydale with me?" the blonde slayer asked. Faith then got a panicked look on her face, "I-I dunno about that, B. The whole gang...they hate me. And I don't blame them..." she looked away from Buffy again. "I'll talk to them, I'm sure they'll give you another chance. And I'm not gonna lie to you and say that it's going to be easy because it's not. Far from it. But don't you think it's something you need to do?"
"Yeah, of course. I hurt them a lot. I've worked it out with Queen C and Wes. But Red, Xander, Giles...Shit, Buffy, I don't think I can do it. Hell, I know I can't do it."
Buffy then put her hand up to the glass and locked eyes with the brunette. "Yes you can. And I'll help you, so will Angel. I believe in you..." Faith put her hand where Buffy's was so that if there wasn't a thick pane of glass they'd be touching. The brunette let a tear slip down her face and a small smile to appear. "Thank you."
Buffy smiled back at her, overjoyed that she had gotten through to Faith. Then a big guard came up behind the brunette and pulled her up harshly. "Times up," he boomed. The slayers hung up their receivers and before Faith was led away Buffy mouthed 'I'll come back'. And they smiled at each other one last time before they could no longer see each other.
For once Buffy felt truly happy about something. She couldn't wait until Faith was let out and they could start their friendship over. But first she'd have to convince the Scoobs that Faith had changed.
She pushed those unpleasant thoughts out of her head for the moment. She couldn't keep the grin off her face as she walked out and headed back to the Hyperion. Things were really looking up.
...to be continued...