Nothing Else Matters
by Hose Jockey 20
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I make no money. All hail Joss and his band of mutants. Metallica
and "Nothing Else Matters" are owned by Elektra Records. The lyrics were written
by James Hetfield and Lars Ulrich. Guns 'N Roses and "November Rain" are owned
by Geffen Records.
Spoilers: Somewhere after when Faith takes off.
Author's Notes: This is my first fanfic, and I'm rather proud of it. [ ] Denotes
song lyrics.
Thanks: All the people who read my stuff and gave feedback. You know who you are.
Feedback: Please!
The blonde Slayer and the brunette Slayer patrolled in silence. Faith had come back just a scant week ago, and was barely getting back into the swing of things. This was their first patrol together in months. The duo hadn't spoken a word since the patrol had started, the tension between them so thick you could taste it. Buffy still had to maintain the façade of being unforgiving for what Faith had done, but in all reality she had let Faith off the hook, and-
"Hey B, check out your two o'clock. Four vamps," Faith broke the silence, switching into slayer mode. She hadn't staked a vamp in nearly four months, and was looking forward to this.
"Got 'em. Let's roll," replied Buffy shortly.
The pair silently walked over to the knot of vampires that were standing in the alley. When they got within 10 feet of the little group of the undead, Faith spoke.
"Hey boys! Havin' fun?" The vamps immediately spun around to face the two Slayers, and two got staked for their trouble. The remaining pair attacked without hesitation.
Buffy gave hers a series of quick jabs, immediately followed by a roundhouse kick to the face, ending the fight with a stake to the unbeating heart of her foe.
Faith, meanwhile, was having a little more difficulty with her chosen vampire. After taking a few shots to the head, she finally got a kick to the vamp's face, staggering it. It immediately turned around with a knife, and sliced her forehead. Faith grabbed the stake from her waistband and turned it into a pile of dust. She looked in annoyance at the blood flowing freely from the gash in her head; that had never happened before in a slaying. She was pissed that she had let that happen.
"Oh, Christ, you're bleeding," said Buffy, finally noticing the trouble her fellow slayer was in. "Let's go and get you patched up." She started to move towards Faith, who allowed herself to be examined by the blonde.
"I'm all right, B. Just a little scratch." It certainly didn't feel like a little scratch, Faith noticed as she began to lose consciousness from the blood loss. She passed out in the arms of Buffy seconds later.
When she woke up, she was lying in a bed, with Buffy's eyes fixed firmly on her.
"Shit, what happened? Last thing I remember, I staked that vamp." Faith was confused, not knowing where she was and why she was there.
"Well, I think he nailed you with a knife or some type of blade, because you were bleeding pretty badly," responded the blonde. "You had me pretty scared for a while; you were out for a good three hours. You okay now?"
Faith could see the compassion in her fellow Slayer's eyes, and couldn't bring herself to face them. After all, why should Buffy care about her after what she had done to her?
"Hey now, there'll be none of that!" Buffy exclaimed as she saw the single tear roll down the younger Slayer's cheek. "What's wrong?"
"Buffy," started Faith. "I want to apologize for what I did. I-" she couldn't continue, as a sob escaped her throat. "I'm sorry I hurt you," she finished. She was tired of being the tough one, was tired of having no emotions, and was tired of being so cold and heartless.
The blonde Slayer sat stunned. She had never known Faith to be so... emotional. What the hell had changed?
"Are-" She started to ask Faith "Are you sure you're not delusional?" but held her tongue for fear it would make things worse. "It's okay, Faith, that's in the past. What matters now is that you're okay."
The gratitude that Faith felt and showed overwhelmed the fact that the rest of the Scoobies still didn't trust her. She had made amends with Buffy, and that's all that mattered. She felt... good, but that was too mild a word. It was- there was an emotion she had never really felt before. It was indescribable; all she knew was that she was happy when Buffy was near.
"Are you hungry?" asked Buffy. "'Cause we have some chicken soup if you are." She remembered the younger's desire for food and... that other thing after a good staking. Wish I could help you with that one, too, thought Buffy.
"Yeah, thanks." Faith tried to stand up, but got no further than falling off the bed. "Shit!"
Buffy helped her get back up into the bed, and told her firmly to stay there; she'd be back soon.
Faith slowly gazed around Buffy's room after she left, wondering why she was here instead of at Giles' or Angel's place. She noticed a picture of the Scooby gang on the nightstand. There was a picture of Faith taped to it... there had to be some significance attached to that, but she couldn't figure it out. She looked at the bureau and found another picture of her. Even though she was bedridden, her keen Slayer eyes noticed some lipstick smudges on it.
She heard Buffy coming and quickly shut her eyes, feigning sleep. The older opened the door, a bowl of steaming chicken soup in her hands.
"Dinner's-oops!" she broke off as she saw Faith's peaceful, sleeping face. She made her way over to the nightstand and placed the bowl of soup on it, next to the picture of the Scoobies. Buffy then leaned over and kissed the brunette ever so softly on the forehead, and whispered "Goodnight, my Faith." She sat down in the chair next to the bed and quickly dozed off, exhausted by the day's events.
Faith, who was still awake, lay perfectly still, contemplating what had just happened. Why had she done all that? Only one possibility went through her mind, and that was impossible. Or was it? She decided she didn't know, and went to sleep. She dreamed of Buffy kissing her.
When the older Slayer woke up the next morning, she found Faith was still sleeping. Buffy still couldn't believe that the person who she loved was lying in her bed. She'd had dreams last night of her and Faith kissing. She grabbed some clothes and made her way over to the bathroom, intending to take a shower. She stalled for just one minute, mischievously wondering whether or not she should ask Faith to join her. But she knew she could never do something like that.
When she emerged, feeling like a new Slayer, she found Faith stirring out of her sleep. Sudden panic gripped her. What if Faith remembered the blonde kissing her and calling her "my Faith?"
"Hey," called Faith.
"Morning. Feeling any better?" asked Buffy.
"Much. But I still got the munchies. I see I didn't eat much last night," she remarked, looking at the bowl of cold chicken soup.
"Yeah, you kinda passed out last night. Let me get you some cereal, then. Corn flakes or raisin bran?"
"Girl, I've got to get you some better taste. No Corn Pops or Lucky Charms?" Buffy shook her head. "Okay, I guess it can't be helped. We'll fix it later, so for now, raisin bran is good."
"Okay then. Listen, about last night," started Buffy.
"Don't worry about it. Next time, just microwave it and that'll be fine."
"Huh?" Buffy was confused.
"You're talking about the soup, right?" asked Faith, knowing that she wasn't.
"Oh, yeah," replied a relieved Buffy.
"You know, all this hospitality is starting to make me wonder.... Do you normally spend 20 minutes cooking soup on a stove?"
"No, I don't."
"Then relax. We aren't all that different, you know. Matter of fact, I think we share a lot more than you think," commented Faith.
"I'll go get your cereal," whispered Buffy after a short silence. She left the room wondering just what in the hell Faith had meant by that one.
She went into the kitchen and was fixing Faith's raisin bran and her own corn flakes when she got a sudden urge to switch the radio on. She heard the ending strains of Metallica's "Nothing Else Matters."
How ironic is that? she thought. At that moment she felt that nothing else mattered but Faith and her being together. Just as she was cleaning up, another song came on.
[When I look into your eyes I can see a love restrained. But darlin' when I hold you Don't you know I feel the same? 'Cause nothin' lasts forever And we both know hearts can change And it's hard to hold a candle In the cold November rain We've been through this such a long long time Just tryin' to kill the pain But lovers always come and lovers always go And no one's really sure who's lettin' go today Walkin' away If we could take the time to lay it on the line I could rest my head just knowin' that you were mine All mine So if you want to love me Then darlin' don't refrain Or I'll just end up walkin In the cold November rain Do you need some time... on your own Do you need some time... all alone Everybody needs some time... on their own Don't you know you need some time... all alone I know hard to keep an open heart When even friends seem out to harm you But if you could heal a broken heart Wouldn't time be out to charm you Sometimes I need some time... on my own Sometimes I need some time... all alone Everybody needs some time... on their own Don't you know you need some time... all alone And when your fears subside And shadows still remain I know that you can love me When there's no one left to blame So never mind the darkness We still can find a way Cause nothing lasts forever Even cold November rain Don't ya think that you need somebody Don't ya think that you need someone Everybody needs somebody You're not the only one You're not the only one]
She sat, stunned at the combination of her feelings and the song lyrics, wondering if this was Fate's way of trying to tell her something. She probably would have sat in her little reverie for some time had she not heard Faith calling to her.
"Oh shit, the cereal!" She rushed over to the counter, but their breakfast was already soggy. Damn, she thought. Still muttering curses to herself, she carried the two bowls to her room. The first thing she saw upon opening the door was her bed empty and the window open.
"Faith?" she called tentatively, setting the bowls down. "You here?" She moved to the window, fearing the worst. "Faith!"
"Over here, B." Faith was behind her, standing in the bathroom doorway. Impulsively, Buffy ran over to her and gave her a large hug.
"I-I thought you'd taken off again. I was scared," said the elder.
"I could never do that to you again, B," replied Faith. "I lo-" she broke off, unsure of what the blonde's reaction would be.
"What?" asked the incredulous Buffy, still unsure of what she had just heard.
"Nothing," replied the younger, slightly embarrassed. The two Slayers had not let go of their embrace.
"Go ahead, you can tell me," coaxed Buffy. She hoped she had heard what she thought she'd heard.
"No, I can't."
"Yes you can. You can tell me anything."
"Fine. I love you, okay? I've fallen head over heels for you, and you're gonna break my heart, and I won't ever be able to look at you again if you do." With that, Faith sat down, the tears streaming down her cheeks from the sudden emotional release.
"Faith, baby, it's okay." Buffy sat down, holding Faith against her chest, feeling the tears wet her shirt.
"No it's not. Who am I to think that a girl like you could love a girl like me?" Faith was sobbing now, and hating herself for it. But she couldn't stop.
Slowly, Buffy began to sing, and it was quite pleasant. It took the rogue a moment to recognize the song.
[When I look into your eyes I can see a love restrained But darlin' when I hold you Don't you know I feel the same?]
"Oh, my God," Faith uttered, the realization of what Buffy had just sang dawning over her.
"I love you, Faith. I could just never get the nerve up to tell you."
Faith reluctantly left her spot on Buffy's chest to look her in the eyes, searching for evidence of a lie. There was none.
"I-I don't know what to say," stammered a flustered Faith. "Except that I love you more than is humanly possible."
"Then don't say anything," replied Buffy. She kissed Faith tentatively on the lips, then more passionately. She was more content than ever. She was in love.
"Shit!" Faith yelled, as the vampire she was fighting landed a blow to the side of her head. She connected with a flurry of jabs to the face of the undead creature, and ended the fight with a stake to the vamp's heart. Buffy was immediately beside her, after dusting her chosen vamp.
"You okay, babe?" she asked. The two Slayers were on their way to the Bronze for a night of relaxing dancing and drinking, but they had been ambushed on the way.
"Yeah, I'm okay, B. Thanks," she added.
"Well, I guess you do know how to show a girl a good time. You do this often on a first date?" joked the older. The two of them had become an item two days before, and this was to be their first date, along with the official announcement to the Scoobies that they were going out together. The Chosen Pair were unsure about how the gang would react, but were confident in their love for each other.
"Naw. I reserve things this special just for the people I love," answered the brunette.
"Why, Faith! I'm touched," Buffy replied. "Do you really love me?"
"You know I do."
"I love you too, Faith." With that, the pair kissed and made their way to the Bronze, walking slowly in the moonlight, holding hands. They reached their destination a short while later.
The pair walked in, to find the Scooby gang in their usual place. Giles, of course, wasn't there. He wasn't a frequenter of the Bronze like the rest of the gang, and spent many a night in his cramped apartment.
"Hey guys," Faith greeted. "What's goin' on?"
"Nothing," answered Xander. "That's the whole problem. Hey, Buffy. How you doing?"
"Not bad. Yourself?"
"Could be better." Cordelia, Willow, Tara and Anya were all absent, so only Xander was there. He was quiet without his girlfriend.
"Where are the girls?" asked the blonde.
"In the bathroom. Ah, here they come," Xander said as he noticed the four coming over to the table.
"Hey Buffy, hey Faith," greeted Tara as she sat down. Her girlfriend sat down next to her. Willow still didn't trust Faith. After all, the crazy bitch had tried to stab her half to death before taking off. But, she was willing to make a truce if Buffy thought she was okay. And apparently she did, Willow noted.
"Hey Tara," answered Buffy. "How are you and Will doing?"
"Pretty good," she replied. And to prove that fact, Willow snuggled her head in Tara's shoulder.
"That's good to hear." Faith looked at the group, who stared back, with the exception of Tara, with open distrust. Who could blame them? she thought. After all, she'd stabbed them all in the back when she pulled her disappearing act.
"Listen up, guys," started Buffy. "I've got something to say. If you don't like it, well, frankly, I don't care. This is how I feel, and no one can change that."
"Okay," replied Xander. "What's up?"
"Faith and I" at this point she put her arm around the younger Slayer "well, we're in love. We're going out together. There, that's our big announcement," she finished.
The group remained silent for a few seconds, and suprisingly, it was Willow who broke the silence first.
"I think that's great, Buffy," she said. "Although Faith and I aren't especially close" she shot her eyes at an embarrassed Faith "I guess I have no problem with it. I just want to see you happy," she concluded.
"Thanks Will," said Buffy. "That means more than you'll ever know."
"Yeah, thanks Red," put in Faith. "I wanna say I'm sorry again. I had no right to do what I did to you."
"It's okay, Faith. What's done is done, and I hope you two will be happy together." What she didn't say was "Do her wrong, and I swear I'll kill you."
"I feel an insatiable urge to put my two cents in here," said Xander. He stood up to address his audience. "First off, congratulations girls. That wasn't easy, I know. Second, I hereby express my support for you two and your relationship. Third, I hope to one day catch you two in the act of making out. That is all." He sat down, and was immediately punched in the arm by Anya. "What?" he asked, feigning innocence.
"Okay, your sentiment is appreciated, I think," responded Buffy. "Anyone else?"
"Well, guess it's my turn," said Tara. "Look, I haven't known you two as long as everyone else has, but I must say this. Looking at you two, I can see happiness and love for each other. So, who am I to disagree with that?"
"Well," started Faith. "Thanks a lot, Blondie. Just for the record, me and B do love each other. At least, I know I love her."
"Don't worry Faith. You know I love you." Buffy pulled the other Slayer into a tight hug to prove just that.
"Well, now that we're done with all that, anyone want a drink?" asked Xander.
"That went well," said Buffy. The two had left the Bronze earlier, after dancing, drinking, and generally being relaxed. "Now comes the hard part. Wonder how Mom is gonna react?"
"Don't think so negatively," said Faith. "What's the worst that could happen?"
"Mom could freak out, disown me, and I'd never speak to her again."
"That's real positive thinking." The two were walking through one of the cemeteries in Sunnydale, on their way to Buffy's house. Her mom had just got back from a vacation to Hawaii last night, and was reasonably well rested. Buffy suspected all that was going to change after she broke the news about her and Faith's relationship.
"You know me," said the blonde. "Always a positive thinker." They passed Giles' new apartment, and briefly considered stopping in to break the news to him. But they were on a mission, and Buffy wasn't about to balk on it. She was sure if she stopped somewhere, her nerve would fail her.
Faith, sensing this, put her arm around Buffy's shoulders. The gesture immediately brought new resolve to the older Slayer.
"Relax, B. It's just another walk in the park." The younger then started humming a song. Buffy recognized it immediately. It was "November Rain," by Guns 'N Roses. The two considered that to be their song, since that was the song that really brought them together. Buffy sang the lyrics in a soft voice, so only Faith could hear her. It electrified them both.
"God, I love you Faith."
"I love you too, B. So let's get this done, okay?"
"Okay."
The two Slayers walked hand in hand until they reached Buffy's house. They stopped outside the door; Buffy was formulating her plan of attack. She decided that the direct, no nonsense approach was the best way to go, so she led the rogue into her house.
"Hi Mom!" Buffy exclaimed upon seeing Joyce Summers.
"Well, hello Buffy. I was starting to wonder if I was ever going to se you again. Oh, hi Faith," she remarked upon seeing the younger Slayer.
"Hey Mrs. S! How are you?"
"Fine, thank you. And yourself?"
"Couldn't be better."
The little party went into the living room at Buffy's insistence. Joyce sat down on her favorite easy chair, and the two girls sat down on the loveseat.
"So, what did you want to talk to me about, Buffy?" asked Joyce.
"Well, I sorta have an announcement to make. We sorta have an announcement to make," Buffy corrected, reminding herself that it was as much Faith's announcement as much as it was her own.
"Okay...?" Joyce was a bit puzzled, but braced herself for the worst.
"Well, me and Faith... that is to say..." Buffy lost track of her thoughts for a second.
"Yes?" prompted Joyce, who was more curious than anything now.
"Me and Faith love each other," Buffy blurted.
"Well, I kinda figured as much," replied Joyce after a brief silence.
"Huh?" The word just fell out of Faith and Buffy's mouths at the same time.
"It was rather plain to see, especially to my old eyes. But I'm glad that you found someone your own age for a change. Really, did you think you could keep this from me forever?" joked Buffy's mom.
"Well, no, but... how did you know? I only figured it out a few days ago. I mean, I knew how I felt, and was pretty sure I knew how Faith felt, but we only just got together a few days ago."
"So who else knows?" asked Joyce.
"The Scoobies. I was going to tell you first, but wasn't sure how you'd take it. Sorry, mom," said an apologetic older Slayer.
"That was sort of a test run, ya know, Mrs. S.?" said Faith.
"Okay, okay, don't be sorry. I guess it went well?"
"Yes it did, Mom. Everybody is supportive as they can be, even Willow."
"Yeah, after what I did to Red, she's the last one I would have expected to give us a thumbs-up, ya know?" commented Faith. This earned her a caustic look by her girlfriend. "What'd I say?" she asked innocently.
"You know what?" said Buffy. "I'm dead tired, so I think I'll go to sleep. Mom, it okay if Faith crashes here?"
"Sure, just no fooling around," cracked Buffy's mom. "And don't wake me up with any 'noises,' if you know what I mean."
"Gee thanks Mrs. S," said Faith. "And rest assured that we won't wake you up." She said it with a small smile on her lips, thinking bad things.
"That's reassuring, Faith," commented Joyce. "I guess I'll go to bed, too. Don't stay up too late."
"No way, Mom. C'mon Faith, you can sleep in my room."
"Sounds good to me," replied the younger.
The two Slayers left the living room, with Joyce on their tails. The girls went to Buffy's room, and Joyce went to her own, for some much-needed slumber.
"Good night Mom," said Buffy before they parted.
"Yeah, g'night, Mrs. S.," echoed Faith.
"Good night, girls. And I'm warning you. Any sounds that wake me up..." she trailed off, with a smile.
"You've got nothing to worry about, Mom. Does she, Faith?"
"Not at all," replied the brunette.
"Okay, then." Joyce went into her room, and the girls entered Buffy's. Faith was immediately hit with memories of the last time they were here together, when Faith was injured. The two climbed into Buffy's bed, and snuggled with each other. They kissed good night, and went to sleep almost immediately, exhausted after the day's events.
The alarm clock woke them at seven o' clock, sharp. Buffy had to stop Faith from throwing it through the window.
"Jeez, B, why in the hell are we getting up so damn early?" Faith asked. She was accustomed to waking up at 10 am or later. "Especially on a Saturday. You know, the weekend is meant for sleeping in." With that, she rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.
"Uh uh, I don't think so," said the older. "We have some stuff to do, like shopping. Wake up, sleepy head." Buffy yanked the covers off of Faith, and a brief struggle ensued, which Buffy quickly won.
"Shopping? I don't think so," replied Faith, sitting in her shorts and sports bra on Buffy's bed. She noticed the older staring with unconcealed pleasure. "You like?" she asked provocatively.
"Oh yeah," answered Buffy. She couldn't resist looking at the younger's beautiful figure, marred here and there by old scars. She winced when she saw the scar on Faith's stomach, remembering what caused it.
"Well, as long as I'm up, you got any coffee?" Faith asked.
"Since when do you drink coffee?"
"Since I'm up at seven o' clock on a Saturday, that's when."
"Yeah, okay. Let me go make some, then." The older Slayer left the room to go make her girlfriend's coffee. It took about ten minutes, and by the time she returned, Faith was already in the shower.
"Okay, so now what do I do?" She thought for a second or two, then turned on the radio. Buffy popped her favorite CD in the player, and was jammin' to the music by the time the younger Slayer came out of the bathroom.
"Hey, is that Metallica I hear?" she asked. Upon the reply of "Yeah," she sat down and drowned herself into the music. Buffy got up and made her way into the shower, as she still had some stuff on her from last night. Faith sat there, listening to James Hetfield sing his heart out on "The Unforgiven" and it was all she could do not to get up and start headbanging. She was listening to the final chords of "Through the Never" when Buffy came out, looking much better. The song changed.
[So close, no matter how far Couldn't be much more from the heart Forever trusting who we are And nothing else matters Never opened myself this way Life is ours, we live it our way All these words I don't just say And nothing else matters Trust I seek and I find in you Every day for us something new Open mind for a different view And nothing else matters Never cared for what they do Never cared for what they know But I know So close no matter how far Couldn't be much more from the heart Forever trusting who we are And nothing else matters Never cared for what they do Never cared for what they know But I know Never opened myself this way Life is ours, we live it our way All these words I don't just say Trust I seek and I find in you Every day for us something new Open mind for a different view And nothing else maters Never cared for what they say Never cared for games they play Never cared for what they do Never cared for what they know And I know So close no matter how far Couldn't be much more from the heart Forever trusting who we are And nothing else matters]
The two sat there, hand in hand while the song played, almost in a trance.
"Wow." Buffy finally broke the silence.
"Yeah." They finally roused themselves when "Of Wolf and Man" finished playing, and Faith drank her coffee. Cold or not, she didn't care; she was feeling weird. The two Slayers got up, ate breakfast, and left the house, on their way to bigger and better things. Like shopping. And they both felt good because they were together. They were in love, so nothing else mattered.