Soul Slayers
by Irish_Piper
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I of course own absolutely nothing here.
Joss is the man. He's the genius. I'm just using his
characters to have a little fun. And also the big
companies with the money - Fox, UPN, The WB, Mutant
Enemy, and all those other people. You own a part of
it all.
Spoilers: Set somewhere near the end of season 4, but
'This Year's Girl' and 'Who Are You' never happened.
Author's Notes: Ok, I'm in a weird mood after just
watching 'Soul Survivors', so that's where I got the
name as well. It was freaky, but cool. Best part
being that Eliza was in it of course! Lol. Okay, yes,
that was the only reason I got it out. That Raven
person totally scared me though! So now I'm in a
freaky mood, and this is what has resulted.
Dedication: For my best friends who I've come to know
and love over the years. You think I'm absolutely
insane and obsessed with Buffy – but yeah! I am!
Well, tough shit, girls! And for Eliza, for being
such a bloody brilliant person.
Feedback: Would be much appreciated.
Saturday
It was a quiet, windy evening, and the Scoobies had all reconvened at Giles' house for a meeting. It wasn't because there was some new evil a-brewing; they were just... well... bored! Vamp-action was getting pretty dull thanks to Adam's scientific projects putting the fear of the Sun into them. Riley however wasn't present, as the Initiative were in the lab, looking for ways to stop Adam.
Buffy was glad. She liked Riley, she really did. She was just getting sick of spending every waking moment with him. And he just wasn't that much fun! She thought that's what she wanted. Joe Normal. But she liked them to at least have a personality!
Buffy sighed. She was contemplating breaking up with him. It would be better for them both. She wouldn't have to keep pretending she loved him, and he wouldn't have to have a girlfriend who he thought loved him.
"You ok, Buff?"
Willow was looking at her with concern, as Buffy hadn't been listening to a word anyone was saying.
"Yup! I'm great," the blonde Slayer lied, hoping Willow would just return to flirting some more with Tara, her girlfriend. Thankfully, she did. Suddenly the phone rang, and Buffy answered.
"Hello?"
"Oh, Buffy, hi."
"Mom? Is everything ok? Are you ok? There wasn't an attack or anyt... "
"Buffy, I'm fine." Joyce paused, not wondering if over the phone was the best way to tell her daughter what she had just found out. However, she also knew that if she asked her daughter to return home first, that she would be worried, and besides – she knew how stubborn her daughter could be.
"Well, why do you sound so worried then?"
"I had a call from the hospital earlier." She paused again. "It's about Faith."
"Faith?" the Slayer asked surprised. "Why would they call us about... "
Buffy froze in mid-sentence. Her face paled, and her eyes went wide.
"Buffy, Faith died this morning. There was a brain haemorrhage. There was nothing they could do. I'm sorry Buffy. Do you want me to collect you or something?"
The rest of the gang, had heard Buffy say Faith's name, and had immediately known what had happened when they saw the look on her face. They were also shocked, but not as remorseful and guilty as Buffy was right now.
"Buffy? Hello? Are you there, honey?"
Giles could hear Joyce calling to Buffy down the phone, but her daughter was not responding. He slowly took the phone from her and talked to Joyce, as Willow guided the blonde over to the couch.
"She can't be dead. She was in a coma. She was going to wake up, and we could have sorted everything out."
Buffy was talking to herself more than the group of worried friends converging around her supportively. They knew that this was going to affect Buffy deeply. She had been visiting Faith in the hospital on a weekly basis over the past eight months. Buffy didn't think that they knew, but they did.
She suddenly pushed herself off the seat, and stood before them.
"Maybe if I had been there... God, I should have been there. Maybe I... I could have... "
She couldn't continue. She just collapsed on the carpet, sobbing in convulsions. Willow hugged her shaking friend, and Buffy clung onto her weakly.
"Buffy, there is nothing you, or any doctor could do for her. But I'm sure she knew you came to see her all the time. Buffy, you were always there for her, and she'll remember that. You have to believe me."
Willow knew the Chosen Two had always had a special relationship, but now this confirmed her beliefs – that Buffy loved Faith.
"I never got the chance. To say sorry. To fix everything."
"I know. I know."
Willow had never felt so helpless in her life. There was nothing she could say to help her friend feel any better. She nodded to Xander, and he came over to the two girls.
"Come on, Buff, I'll take you home."
Buffy just continued crying, as Xander reached down and picked her up carefully. He was afraid he would break her, she looked so fragile right now. They decided it would be better for Buffy to be at home with her mother, than in her dormroom.
So Xander and Anya brought the Slayer home, and Joyce eventually got her tucked into bed. She waited by her daughter's bedside, until she finally cried herself to sleep.
Thursday
The window in Buffy's bedroom was slightly open, and the cool night wind was blowing in through it. Buffy awoke to see the curtains flapping slightly. Suddenly she felt another presence in the room. She looked over to her door, but there was nobody there. She turned back to look at the curtains, and nearly screamed. There, resting comfortably, in black leather pants and a white tank top, was Faith. Buffy gaped, open-mouthed for a few seconds.
"But... they said you... that you were... "
"Yeah, I know what they said. That I was dead. And they were right."
Buffy's heart broke, after thinking that she hadn't lost Faith for a second. The dark-haired Slayer moved over to the bed, when she saw the confusion washing over the older girl's face.
"I died, B. Don't worry. It didn't hurt or anything. Was in a coma, remember? It was pretty cool in the end. I mean, I've never felt so free."
Buffy felt tears welling up in her eyes. Faith saw them, and as they rolled down Buffy's cheeks she wiped them away. She looked at her sadly, as Buffy began to speak.
"Faith, I'm so sorry. We never got to sort everything out. We..."
"Shusshhh, B, it's ok. I want you to know, that I am sorry, for it all. I freaked out, after killing Allan. It's ok now, B."
"No, Faith, *I* need to apologise. I'm the one who freaked out. I was afraid. Afraid of having the death of a man on our hands, afraid of letting you in, afraid of what I was feeling."
Faith stood up from the bed.
"Don't worry anymore, B. We're ok now."
"Faith... "
All of a sudden, Buffy could hear her alarm.
"Faith, come back... Wuh!"
Buffy sat upright on her bed, looking around her room frantically. It was only a dream, she thought. Faith was dead, and Buffy had imagined it all. Buffy sighed shakily, and noticed that her cheeks were tear-stained.
She had been crying herself to sleep ever since she heard about Faith. The funeral had been awful for the blonde Slayer. She had kissed Faith on the forehead as the brunette Slayer lay in her coffin. Buffy looked at her alarm, and noticed that it was now eleven o'clock, even though her alarm was set for half past nine.
"Strange... "
Buffy reluctantly crawled out of bed, and got ready for yet another day without Faith.
Friday
The graveyard was empty, as Buffy made her way to Faith's grave. The autumn leaves were blustering all around her, and she pulled her long coat around her. She swallowed hard, to keep the tears back when she saw Faith's headstone. She knelt down next to the grave, gazing at the headstone, before reaching into her pocket. She pulled out a guardian angel brooch, and pinned it into one of the ornamental features on the grave.
"Now, my mother gave this to me when I was smaller... no that isn't an invitation for height jokes Faith. Anyway, it's a guardian angel. To look after you, and remind you that there's always someone out there looking after you. So I want you to have it. And remember that I'm always thinking about you."
Buffy got up again, and dusted down her pants. She remembered that the gang were going out tonight, and they were dragging her to The Bronze with them. She wasn't in the mood, but they figured it was best for her, and she couldn't argue with Willow's resolve face for long. Buffy looked at the headstone once more, before making her way back to her and Willow's dormroom to get ready.
The Bronze was pretty full when the Scoobies arrived. The crowds were dancing, talking drinking, relaxing. The girls found some seats, while Xander went to get the drinks. Buffy had finally broken up with Riley the day after Faith's funeral so he wasn't present. She couldn't string him along anymore, and she felt free when he was gone.
After a while of awkward talking, everyone's attempts at cheering the blonde Slayer up failed, the others went to dance.
"You sure you don't mind? 'Cos I can stay here if you want?"
"Willow, I'm positive. Go dance! Show 'em how it's done!"
Buffy smiled half-heartedly at her friend, and relaxed into the couch when she was finally alone. She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, tired from getting so little sleep the past week. When she opened her eyes, Faith was sitting in the seat opposite to her, watching her and smiling.
"Faith... "
"B, you gotta forgive yourself."
Buffy paused, and looked at the table solemnly.
"I can't. Faith, I miss you... "
But when she looked back up, Faith was gone, and her friends were returning to the table again.
"Phew! That was fun, huh?!"
Willow always loved dancing at the Bronze. Well, it was the only decent club in Sunnydale, but she still enjoyed it. She frowned at the sight of her best friend searching the crowds anxiously with panic-filled eyes.
"Buffy? What is it? Who are you looking for?"
Buffy finally gave up the search, realising that Faith was gone. God, I am going nuts, the Slayer thought to herself.
"Oh, nothing, just thought I saw someone from our sociology class. But it must have been someone else."
Willow didn't buy it like the rest of the group, and sat next to the blonde.
"Buffy, what's going on? Are you sure you're ok? 'Cos I doubt you got that worked up over seeing someone you know from school."
Buffy sighed. She just wanted Willow to stay out of this.
"I'm fine. Honestly. I'm just a little tired. Think I'll head home."
That night, Buffy lay in bed crying. She still felt so betrayed by the world, having lost her chance to make things up with her fellow Slayer. And she would never get the chance to tell her how she really felt about her.
Willow slowly opened the door, thinking that her roommate would be sound asleep. She sighed quietly when she saw her crying softly. Willow sat on the side of Buffy's bed, and cradled the shaking girl. Buffy just cried harder, and told Willow everything. She couldn't keep it in much longer. She finally fell asleep in Willow's arms after many tears.
The swings in the deserted playground were swaying gently in the autumn breeze. Buffy could now see a figure sitting on one of them. She sat on the swing next to her, and Faith started to swing slowly, keeping her feet on the ground.
"B, you need to tell me why you keep bringing me back. We must both move on. You have your whole life ahead of you."
Buffy looked at the brunette dumbfounded. *She* was the one bringing her back? But how? She thought it was Faith coming to her. Or her imagination. Faith seemed to understand what Buffy was thinking from her facial expressions, and answered for her.
"B, you still believe that I don't forgive you. So you're gonna keep bringing me back to you, until you feel you've gotten my forgiveness. But you're never going to believe that you have, B. You're just gonna keep beating yourself up over it."
Buffy hung her head.
"I know, Faith. But I feel so guilty. I always thought you'd wake up from your coma, and we could sort everything out."
"But B, I'm not gonna wake up, remember? What happened, happened for a reason. It was my time."
Suddenly Buffy realised they weren't on the swings anymore. They were sitting on a bench, looking at Sunnydale from atop a hill.
"You gotta remember, B, that I don't belong here. Besides... I was never wanted here anyway, so it's all the same."
"I wanted you," Buffy replied, wracked with guilt and loss.
Faith stood up, and smiled at Buffy, before walking away once again.
"Faith, don't go, I need you! I want you back, Faith, I *need* you back!"
But Faith faded away out of sight, and Buffy abruptly woke up.
"I love you Faith," she whispered tenderly, before crying again. She felt so helpless. She was keeping Faith from moving on, but she didn't know how to stop it from happening.
Willow, having been in the bathroom down the hall, rushed in when she saw the state of Buffy once more.
"Was it Faith?"
"Yes. Will, I need her back. I can't do this without her."
"Yes, Buffy, you can," the redhead told her, while stroking the Slayer's hair. "And you know that she would want you to."
"I know... "
The dormroom door was still open from when Willow had ran in, and Buffy looked out into the hallway, to see Faith walk past the door. Buffy bolted out of the bed, and ran into the hallway, calling Faith's name frantically. The hallway was empty, and Willow followed the blonde out there. She pulled Buffy back inside reluctantly, and got her ready for the day. The Slayer was in no condition to do it herself. She seemed to be away in another world.
Saturday
The Scoobies had unwillingly agreed with the blonde Slayer, to let her go patrolling alone the next night. She needed some time to clear her head. Unfortunately, the vampires didn't see it that way. Two males jumped her in the cemetery, and she had to struggle to free herself. It took her a while before she staked the first guy. The second vamp was a little stronger however, and he picked her up over his head, and flung her into a headstone. Luckily, she had already staked him, and he fell to a pile of ash, because the Slayer fell unconscious from the knock to her head.
Buffy woke up holding her head. Her vision was slightly blurry but she could make out someone crouching in front of her, looking into her eyes. Buffy wasn't as surprised as before to realise it was Faith.
"Faith... "
"Shush, B, don't try to talk. That's a pretty nasty bump you got there."
Faith brushed Buffy's hair out of her eyes and rubbed her head tenderly, where Buffy had hit it.
"B, I won't be able to come back anymore. They won't let me."
"What? No! I need you Faith!"
Buffy could feel new tears in her eyes.
"Then I'll go with you Faith," the blonde replied, trying to get up, but the wave of dizziness taking over and keeping her down.
"Not your time to go yet, B. Goodbye."
With that, Faith kissed Buffy lovingly on her forehead, but when Buffy opened her eyes Faith was gone. It rapidly started lashing rain, and Buffy, crying her eyes out, stumbled to Faith's grave. She fell to her knees, and started calling to Faith again.
"I'm sorry Faith. I love you."
"I love you too, B."
Buffy's eyes shot open, and she swung around to search the graveyard for Faith, but she wasn't there. Then Buffy heard someone say, "Oh, screw the rules", before Faith appeared yet again, this time sitting on her headstone.
Buffy knelt upright, and moved over to Faith so she was looking into her face. She rested her hands on Faith's knees, and Faith lay hers on Buffy's shoulders.
"B, it doesn't matter if we love each other."
"Yes, it does. I can't go on without you."
"You have to, B."
"No."
Buffy leaned up and kissed Faith. She wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist, and could feel the love and passion between them.
Faith pulled away reluctantly, telling her "we can't", before disappearing. Buffy cried, realising finally that Faith was dead. She looked at the guardian angel brooch before she slogged home.
Sunday
The next morning Buffy woke with a thumping headache from her near defeat by the vampire. Willow had had to comfort her again, and wasn't at all surprised when Buffy told her that she loved Faith. She *was* worried, however, about the fact that Buffy was 'seeing' Faith. She knew that her friend was afraid to let her fellow Slayer go.
That night, all the gang went on patrol. They didn't think Buffy should be left alone anymore in her state of mind. In the same cemetery as the night before, they encountered a group of large vampires.
"Ah. Slayer. You're gonna pay for killing Hank and Dimitri last night."
"Oh, you should be thanking me, guys! Did you *really* want to be seen with guys with names like that? Could totally ruin your popularity."
As expected, this pissed the vamps off, and a battle ensued. The Wiccans used their magic to fend off some of them, while Xander and Anya, tried to stake them. Giles was using a crossbow, and his aim was surprisingly good. After about fifteen minutes, seven out of the eight vamps had been dusted.
"Where's the big-mouth one?" Buffy asked, out of breath from the fight.
"Over here, darlin'," he snarled, holding up a gun. Shit, Buffy thought. Most vampires didn't go for the loaded weapon thing, sticking to using their fists. Buffy's instant reaction was to go and guard her friends, so she stood protectively in front of them.
"Ah, my first Slayer. This is gonna be good."
He grinned wickedly, showing his fangs, before firing the gun. Buffy could do nothing, as she felt the bullet enter her stomach, near her left ribs. The vampire was laughing now, but he soon shut up when an arrow staked him. Giles dropped the crossbow when the vamp turned to dust, and they all ran to Buffy.
"Oh, my God, Buffy! Whadowe do?! Whadowe do?!"
Willow was getting hysterical, and Tara was trying to calm her. Xander rang for an ambulance on his mobile, and Anya and Giles looked on, dazed and horrified. They were in complete shock.
Buffy could hear and see the panic in her friends around her, but she couldn't find the energy to respond to them. She sighed with relief when she saw Faith walk up and kneel next to her, caressing her forehead.
"I knew you'd come for me."
"No, B, I came to tell you that it's *not* your time. You gotta hang in there, ok?"
"No, Faith, I want to be with you!"
"You have to stay with your friends, B. You need them."
Faith crouched up, and was about to leave, when Buffy grabbed the sleeve of her dark jacket.
"You can't leave me again, Faith. It's *you* I need. We both know a new Slayer will be called."
Faith looked at Buffy's pleading eyes, and took her hands in her own.
"Buffy." The blonde Slayer had never heard Faith sound more serious in her life. "You know that if you came with me there would be no going back? That you would be leaving everything behind? Your mom, your friends... "
Buffy cut Faith off; feeling hopeful that she was getting through to her.
"Faith, I know I'm being selfish here, but it's our chance to be together."
Faith stood up, and Buffy did the same. Her body was really weak, and so she would have fallen, if Faith hadn't caught her.
"Woah, there!"
Faith looked into Buffy's eyes, but she closed them when Buffy reached up and kissed her. They stayed like that for a few minutes; kissing, while Faith supported Buffy. They broke apart, gasping for air, and Buffy noticed something on Faith's jacket. The brunette was wearing the brooch. Buffy smiled warmly at her, and kissed her again.
"I love you, Faith."
"I love you, B."
Buffy looked like she was going to pass out now, so Faith picked her up, and carried her away with her.
The Scoobies were all distraught, as the paramedics told them that Buffy was gone. Willow felt her heart break at having lost her best friend. She knew though. She knew that Buffy was finally happy, and with Faith. The Wiccan darted towards Faith's grave, and looked for the guardian angel she knew Buffy had left there. Willow smiled when she saw that it was gone.
"Take care of each other."
She looked up at the starry sky, and smiled sadly, before making her way back to the rest of the Scoobies.