Caught In the Sun
by KC Hights
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Buffy and Faith belong to Joss.
Note: This is a song fic. It's based on course of
nature's "caught in the sun". It's a good song, and
for some reason I thought it would fit, but I don't think it worked out so well.
Anyway, enjoy. Just don't be too cruel to me.
Dedication: Loyal Buffy/Faith fans.
Feedback: Yeah, that would be nice. I honestly think I suck at
writing. Urghhh.
I closed my eyes and stood alone by her grave as the sun began to fade. Soon, there would be darkness, darkness again.
//What if I missed you? You got caught in the sun. What if I did something, never to be enough?//
I let out a sigh as I battled to contain the tears that were building at the back of my eyes. I missed my only chance of making things right with her. I missed it, I miss her, and now she's really gone.
//You're my distanced destination of choice I'd give anything just to hear your voice//
"B," I whispered, slowly reaching out a hand and tracing my fingers over the grooves of her name on the tombstone. "…I, I'm sorry. I know it's too late to say this to you but…I never meant to hurt you. All those times I was trying so hard to win your love. God, I was so jealous of the way you treated everybody except me. I didn't know what I was thinking. I went mad. Crazed. Mostly cuz I was too scared to tell you that I love you. I love you B, and you never got to hear this. I handled you all wrong B….all wrong."
//What would it take for me to be comfortable? With you, with me you're the chosen one//
I fell forward to my knees, my body too tired to keep up with grief. As I bowed my head down I finally allowed myself to cry. For the first time in my life, I was utterly vulnerable, utterly defeated at a battle I never meant to win.
When there were no more tears left to cry, I find myself greeted by most beautiful sunrise. Time seemed to have gone by quickly, too quickly. And the night, empty and dark as it was, was once again replaced with the warmth of the sun.
For moment, it almost felt like she was still around because when I closed my eyes, I could still see her smile.
//You are there for me this I hope and pray You will wait for me, I won't be too late//
I will find her though, soon enough. That's the life of a slayer, too short to be truly happy and way too long to suffer all these pain. And when I do see her, in heaven or in hell, I'm gonna tell her. I'm gonna tell her that as short-lived as it was, I found happiness with her. More joy, and more pain than I ever thought possible.
As I made my way down the morning streets of Sunnydale, I was aware of how differently everything appeared to be. The once quiet Sunnydale morning was now filled with busy cars and crowded streets.
Then as if fate would have it, I came across a familiar face in the crowd, an all too familiar blond. She stood there across the street as if she was looking right at me, and I literately felt my heart stop.
//People everywhere how could I be sure Is it you that I have been looking for?//
"B…" I mumbled incoherently, never taking my eyes off her. "It can't be…this can't be possible." And yet I watched as the older slayer made her way over until she stopped a few feet in front of me.
"Faith…" she said, and I was struck by the sadness of her voice. There were tears in her eyes, and she looked cold; her skin seemed so pale under the sun.
Is she alive? Or am I hallucinating?
"Buffy…" I opened my mouth and slightly shook my head, barely forming a sentence as I reached my hand out at her.
But before I could touch her, someone in the crowd ran into me and pushed me aside. And when I turned around, B had vanished without a trace, leaving me once again, alone.
And I let her slip away from me this time. But I know I'll see her again. Soon. I'll see her soon.
//I couldn't pass you on the street Without saying a word Most times I missed the voice That goes unheard What if I missed you You got caught in the sun What if I did something Never to be enough//