Take Me Down
by Lowdeen
Rating: R
Disclaimer: The characters and show all belong to Joss Whedon, Fox,
and Mutant Enemy. The story contains love between two women, so if
such things offend you, don't read it and upset yourself.
Author's Notes: Sequel to the series "Turning the Screw" so as a
recap, The Scooby Gang minus Willow is dead, the LA contingent is
dead, and the slayers are vampires. This story has a whole different
tone than the previous. Not as evil-go-lucky.
"Fuck me!" A booted foot punt kicked an already bruised face.
"Not an option, loserboy."
The hand that grabbed onto his throat jerked upwards almost lifting him off his feet into a standing position. A face swam into view, the devil's own if he didn't already know who she was. But she was close enough and he trembled, more frightened than he'd ever been in his life or his un-life, for that matter.
An unbalanced slayer.
An unbalanced slayer turned vampire.
An unbalanced slayer turned vampire in a piss poor mood. And he just *had* to attract her attention. What did he ever do to deserve this, he desperately wondered as her fist came smashing towards his nose...again. This time, he knew as soon as he got hit that he wouldn't be getting back up again cause, this time, he could feel his brain getting scrambled like a runny egg inside his head. He almost thanked God that the stake finally penetrated his heart just so he wouldn't be used as some jacked up punching bag for some wacked out bitch. And as his body turned to dust, he gathered every last bit of rage and punked out attitude left inside to throw her a last bloody, 'I-ain't-nobody's-bitch' grin.
A leg came rushing to meet his face but by the time it whipped past, there was nothing to hit but so much dust floating to the ground. "Fucking bastard!" Faith hissed, kicking the cement wall instead. She should have kept him alive a little longer, just so she could beat every last shred of will from the undead son of a bitch. She hated not having the "last word" so to speak and hated it even more when some nothing newbie thought he was better than her...thought he could get away with showing her up.
"Fucking bastard," she repeated in a lower tone that held no less anger in it. She punched the wall this time, hard enough to break her hand and hard enough to make her forget for one second at least why she was so pissed off. But it was only that one second and the bones were already starting to mend themselves by the time she pulled her hand back. Shaking herself and feeling her face change back to human form and the fangs recede, she stepped out of the abandoned building and onto the sidewalk. She put the dark sunglasses back on cause even if the sun wasn't going to fry her to a piece of soot, it still irritated her eyes like there was a grain of sand stuck in there or something.
It wasn't enough. Nothing was enough anymore. The fighting, the killing, the blood, nothing. Cause Buffy wasn't there anymore. Where the fuck was she? She'd just disappeared one night over a week ago and left no note, no word, no nothing to say where she'd gone. And from that moment on, Faith's world had gone from a rose tinted paradise to a shithole disguised as a life. She'd fallen so hard for the girl that it was a wonder she could even lift her head up off the pavement. But it wasn't even a recent development cause Buffy "Because It's Wrong" Summers was number one in her life. Had been ever since they'd met each other. Hell, even before that when her first Watcher would tell her about some ballsy chick tough enough to flip destiny the bird. Even when it was foretold she'd die at the hands of the Master Vampire, she walked into it with her head held high. How could you not fall for that?
And just when she'd gotten Buffy, just when she thought they were finally going to be together like it was meant to be...
No, Faith thought wildly. No fucking way this is how it's gonna go down. She couldn't believe Buffy would just leave her like this. Something must have happened to her...or someone. And she knew, she just knew, deep in her gut that it had to be that Willow bitch. Who else would want to break them up...could break them up? It was Red and it was also her own damn fault for not taking care of the problem before leaving Sunnydale. She growled deep in her throat---an animalistic lust for blood. Lust for a certain redhead's blood. Walking towards her green convertible, she had to try really, really hard to stop the demon from showing on her face. Right now, she had places to be and a witch to find.
The first thing Faith noticed when she got back to the motel room even before she stepped through the door, was that all the curtains were drawn. They'd been open last time she'd checked and unless housekeeping had done it...
Buffy. The name popped into her brain as she fumbled with the key, unable to get inside fast enough. It was fucking pathetic how happy she was just thinking the blonde might be in there. She'd always thought vampires weren't capable of emotions like humans, especially something like love. She still wasn't sure they could but *she* certainly felt it...*was* feeling it. And it didn't matter if Buffy had just up and abandoned her, didn't matter if she was left hanging for a week cause the feeling didn't change. She needed the other girl like she needed...blood. And if that was pathetic, then screw it, label her pathetic.
She finally got the door open. A second more and she would have just kicked it in.
"Buffy?" Yes. It was her. Faith rushed over, kneeling down in front of the seated figure. And she wrapped her hands in that thick blonde hair, pulling the girl's face down until she could reach those lips and kiss her. Faith's tongue entered her mouth, feeling the combination of cool and wet she'd grown to love so much. She didn't know who groaned first and it really didn't matter cause they were one again. But ever so dimly, through the pleasurable haze, she felt a wetness against the palms of her hands where they touched Buffy's cheeks. And as she pulled back in confusion, she felt her spidey senses tingling all over---the same senses that had saved her ass a thousand times before. So before she even thought about what she was doing, her hand was already reaching out and taking a firm grip of the wooden stake, an inch from making its way into her heart.
"What...?" A fist connected with her jaw before she even knew what to ask. Falling back onto the ground, she felt Buffy getting on top of her, wailing away on her face. After a bit more of the same, everything just went black.
"...know this......Faith......back and it's not..........."
"Buffy, I don't...........cause you know........."
Faith wished her ears would just start working again so she could hear what was going on. But then again, maybe it was her brain that wasn't working right cause the last thing she remembered was being hit...alot and that couldn't be good for the gray matter. Then, just when the fog in her head was starting to clear up some, she got kicked in the stomach. At least that's what she thought had happened. Couldn't really see unless she opened her eyes. And when she opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was a pair of sneakers in front of her face.
That's also when she realized she was lying on her side on the floor of her motel room. She tried getting up but something around her wrists and ankles was making that kind of difficult. She turned her head to look up and that's when the second kick came, catching her full on the face. At least it was sneakers and not combat boots, she thought, shaking her head a bit.
"Willow!" That was definitely Buffy's voice and when she shook off the pain, her eyes focused on another pair of shoes that had walked into her field of vision. Buffy was there and she was just standing there, letting...Willow? beat the living crap out of her. No fucking way. Faith couldn't accept that and she growled letting them know she was still alive and very much pissed off. She braced herself for another kick in the face as Willow's foot reared back but the blow never came.
"Willow, don't," Buffy's voice said again.
Faith couldn't help adding, "Why don't you unlock these chains and then we'll see how easy it'll be for you to kick me again Red?" She jangled the reinforced steel cuffs around her wrists and ankles. A short chain connected the two bands together and she doubted she'd be able to run, let alone walk normally trussed up like this. Not like she was going to run though. No way was she running from some half assed witch who thought she could knock her around and get away with it.
Buffy bent down and hauled her up none too gently into a sitting position. "Don't say anything," she said, staring hard into her eyes.
Confusion, frustration, anger, and the slightest tinge of fear crossed Faith's face. Willow might not scare her but Buffy...that was another story. She still didn't know what had happened and it was probably the smartest move just to take the advice and shut the hell up considering the circumstances...Nah. "Don't tell me not to say anything B. You disappear for a week and then when you come back, you chain me up like a fucking animal so Red over there can take potshots at me. I want to know what's going on."
Buffy looked like she was about to say something but Willow beat her to it. "You don't deserve answers Faith. I can't even ...there's nothing I wouldn't give to kill you with my own hands for everything you've done."
"Can't really blame me," Faith said with a smirk, intent on digging where it hurt. "I'm a demon. It's in my nature just like it's in your nature to abandon your so-called friends to save your own ass. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me you didn't run away the last time we met...hell, I don't even know how you can still live with yourself." Buffy's hand grabbed her throat, squeezing tightly and even though it wasn't like she needed air, she still didn't like it.
"I told you to shut up Faith," Buffy said again, giving her an extra squeeze to emphasize the point. They looked at each other and that bond they shared, the same one that let them know even if they were blind, drunk, and deaf that the other was unquestionably nearby, flared up. "Just shut up," the blonde added more quietly.
Willow's expression was a cross between black rage and emotionally numbing despair, partly because of Faith's words and partly because of the way the two former slayers were still looking at each other. "Buffy...there's no other choice..." she said, trying to shift the blonde's attention.
"There's always a choice!" Buffy yelled, whipping her head around and pinning the witch with an intense stare. "I just need some time to think and if everybody would just..."
"Even if I give her her soul back, do you think she'll thank me?" Willow ignored the desperate look that Buffy was shooting her. She knew what she was about to say would hurt the blonde but some small part of her felt this was what her best friend deserved for all the things she'd done over the past few weeks. Even though she knew it wasn't Buffy but the demon inside her body that committed those atrocities, she couldn't just forgive everything because it was the slayer's face she saw murdering her friends and killing her lover. "I mean, she'll feel the guilt of everything she's done crashing down on her and we all know what happened the last time a conscience caught up to psycho slayer and that was nothing compared to this...compared to what she's done this time." Left unsaid was the accusation in her voice that roped Buffy into the same category as her partner but it was there nonetheless.
Everything began making sense for Faith. It was all the witch's fault. *She* was the one responsible for Buffy's new 'tude. *She* was the one that gave her girl a soul and ruined Faith's un-life in the process. Oh, she was *so* going to pay for this, Faith thought, trying to break the cuffs around her wrists without looking like she was doing so. While she was struggling with this, Buffy's hand began running slowly through her hair, almost like she wasn't even aware she was doing it and Faith arched into the touch.
"Buffy!" Willow had also noticed and the high-pitched squeal that had come out of her mouth made it clear she didn't approve at all. In fact, she was appalled since it looked like the two vampires weren't falling over themselves to kill each other. Just the opposite. This wasn't supposed to happen. Once Buffy's soul was restored, she was supposed to kill Faith and then everything would be all right again.
Buffy turned her head, acknowledging she'd heard the red head but her hand didn't move from stroking Faith's hair. "I know what you want me to do, Will. It's not going to happen."
Faith's face split into a triumphant grin when she saw the witch's face fall at the words. She knew Buffy would never kill her and she couldn't help but gloat over it but she was also leery about what *would* happen to her now. If Buffy got her way, she'd be burdened with a soul again. Not good. Tortured vampire with a soul? Been done already.
"You're serious?" Willow's voice was approaching the higher end again. "You've had a hand in killing every one of our friends. Xander, Angel, Cordelia, Wesley...Tara. You killed the most important person in my life and you did all that because Faith turned you. Now you stand there telling me you're not going to give me my revenge?"
Faith saw that the words were having an affect on her other half. But before she could put in her two cents as to where exactly Willow could shove it, Buffy spoke up. "I know what I did Will...nobody knows better than me what I did but staking Faith isn't going to bring any of them back. I've had enough of killing." There was weariness in her voice as she said this that made Willow clamp her mouth shut. "So even though I know I don't deserve it, I'm asking you for your help...please."
"I'll think about it," Willow finally said, already turning to walk out of the room.
When the door shut behind her, Faith immediately spoke. "I can't believe you're begging that witch to..." She forced the vile words out of her mouth. "To give me back my soul. Don't do me any fucking favors B." She watched as Buffy ignored her words, sitting down heavily on the bed. "Look at you. Are you happy? Of course you're not. How could you be if you're under that bitch's thumb. If you're thinking of doing the same thing to me, think again. I'd rather you just kill me cause I might not have a soul but at least I'm happy the way I am." Buffy still didn't say anything, her gaze cast downcast and her shoulders slumped. Faith decided to change her strategy, softening her voice as she spoke again. "Look, I know you remember how it was. You and me, B. You and me out to screw the world for everything it's ever done to us. We were happy together... I loved you."
Buffy's eyes finally wandered up to stare straight at the bound vampire. "Do you know what I've spent the last week doing?" Her words sounded hollow, her expression empty. "I've spent every last second crying for what I've done, for being so friggin *happy* at murdering my friends. I cried for every person I've killed until I couldn't find the tears anymore but it still hurts so much that I'd like nothing better than to curl up into a ball and die. Yes, I was happy but I wouldn't want that happiness back, not at the cost of everything else...and I know you'll feel the same way Faith. This is the right thing to do."
"Fuck the right thing. I've never been like you B. I can't go through what you've gone through." Her eyes revealed the strain of desperation running through her mind. "You can't do this to me! You have no right!"
Buffy smiled wanly at her words. "Just add that onto the list of my crimes."
Faith growled, violently shaking her chains but they refused to even bend.
Faith growled again but it didn't have much impact coming out muffled and indecipherable through the gag they'd stuffed in her mouth. Her eyes were fixated on Willow and all she could think about were the many different ways she'd like to gut the witch, string her up until her eyes bugged out, make her beg to die...
Even when they began in earnest to lay out the hocus pocus stuff, she couldn't concentrate on escape because she was so filled with rage, she couldn't think. And if things had continued in this vein, she'd probably end up a wussed out vampire by the end of the night, just like Angel, just like Buffy...but fortunately for her, things didn't go at all smoothly for the dynamic duo. Midway through the spell, there was a loud banging on the door which nearly buckled the wood right down the middle. Buffy went and threw it open and that's when everything went to hell. What seemed like two dozen demons rushed in, some tackling the blonde slayer to the floor, some rushing right past her.
Willow had stopped reciting the spell the minute the door had opened and Faith immediately took advantage. She'd seen the key to her chains in the redhead's pocket. Getting up as much as she could, she jumped, barreling into the witch and bringing them both crashing to the floor. In addition to struggling with the witch, Faith felt the first blows from up top where a couple of demons were using her as a punching bag. She worked as fast as she could, ripping Willow's jeans, trying to find that damn key before she passed out from the blows. Just when something sharp pierced her side, her hand closed around the key and she forced it into the lock around her hands, freeing them and finally allowing her to backhand a demon close enough to be almost on top of her.
That created some room for her to move around and she kicked out with her legs to get even more space. She felt, more than saw Willow squirming away from her and, looking across the room, she saw that Buffy was more than handling her own. Bringing her knees up to her chest, she unlocked the cuffs around her ankles and, free at last, she kicked into a fighting stance. The demons looked vaguely familiar but she'd pissed so many of their kind off in the past couple of weeks, she didn't really keep track anymore. Pulling the closest one roughly towards her, she relieved him of his long sword before slicing him across the chest and relieving him of his life as well.
Swinging in a wide arc, she made everybody jump back or risk losing their heads. In any other situation, Faith would've stayed and chopped all these wannabe's into bite sized, consumable chunks of demon chow but her left side was starting to throb and she needed to get gone before Buffy got herself free and focused her attention this way. But before she left, she looked around the room, her eyes lighting up when they found Willow cowering in the corner. Giving the witch a taste of what she had planned for her, she strode over, and with a flick of the wrist, left a little momento on the girl's face and throat.
As an afterthought, she hastily pocketed the papers Willow was reading the spell from and the orb that was still lying on the bed. Spearing a demon who came too close, she kicked him away with the sword's hilt still sticking out of his gut and rushed the entrance of the room where the other slayer was still working over a couple of demons. Her momentum was enough to bowl everyone over. Quickly picking herself up off the floor of the hallway, she ran towards the stairs, throwing aside various occupants of the motel who had come out of their rooms to see what all the commotion was about. Faith didn't look back until she reached her car, jumping into the driver's seat and patting her pockets for the keys. Just when she came up with the keys to the ignition, she glanced up to the rearview mirror and noticed that Buffy was just now running down the stairs.
"See you later, B," she shouted after removing the gag from her mouth. Grinning in pure joy, she started the car, making the tires peel rubber as it screeched out of the parking lot, barely missing a slow moving station wagon that was just turning in. Once she was a fair distance away from the motel and cruising down the streets, she reached over and opened up the glove compartment, rooting through the junk until she came out with a pack of Camels. The car shuddered as it plowed through something or somebody but she was too preoccupied with trying to find a lighter to take notice of what exactly it was she'd just hit. In her mind, if it was important enough, the cops would be on her tail soon enough anyway. Good thing too cause she was starting to feel hungry.
The no-neck with the crew cut sitting in the front of the theater turned around in irritation again as another kernel of popcorn bounced off the back of his head. There weren't that many other people watching in the room and as he tried to make out who could possibly be stupid enough to want to piss him off, another kernel came flying at him, this time hitting him right on the nose.
"Shit! That is it!" He yelled, standing straight up. "Whoever the fuck is doing that, I'm going to rip your fucking head off!" His girlfriend tried to calm him down but he just pushed her away as he glared around. "Stand up. C'mon. Stand the fuck up!" He yelled again. Not having a clue as to who he should be addressing his anger towards just made him all the more mad.
"Hey knuckle dragger, why don't you sit the fuck down before I come down there and tear you a new asshole?" A woman's voice drawled from a few seats up.
If the theater wasn't so dark, everybody would've been able to see the nice bright red color his face was turning. It didn't help that a few seconds later, the whole container of popcorn came flying straight at him, coating him in grease and butter. He knew who did it cause he was staring right at the dark outline when she threw it. It was the same woman who'd just spoke up. And woman or not, nobody disrespected him without getting knocked down...nobody. He stumblingly navigated the narrow space between seats to get to the aisle and was taken aback when he finally got there cause he saw that the woman was already standing there waiting for him.
Her head just came up to his broad shoulders. Her facial features hard to make out in the play of light and dark coming off the movie screen. And she waited there like she expected him to make a move. He hesitated, not sure what to do in this unfamiliar situation. Suddenly, his head snapped back as a fist connected with his face. He stumbled back a step, already feeling the rush of blood pouring down his nose, making it difficult to breathe. He swung his right arm around in a wild swing which was easily blocked as the woman grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in close. She began licking the blood slowly off his face.
Trying to push away didn't help at all because it was like he was suddenly powerless against the strength of this woman. "Please..." he sputtered, choking on his own blood. He hadn't begged since he was eight years old but he was definitely pleading now.
"Since you asked so nicely." The woman's breath fluttered across the bottom of his chin before a sharp pain like nothing he'd ever felt before ripped into his neck and then, he felt nothing.
Faith had the full intention of watching a movie when she'd first snuck into the movie theater but before the film even began rolling, she'd fixated on some clown sitting near the front with his girlfriend. She didn't know why the mere sight of the back of his head made her mad. She didn't really question it. What she did do was throw popcorn at him until he stood up, screaming bloody murder. She smirked in her seat as she shouted back some wiseass comment which made him tense up like he had a stick rammed up his ass.
And as he made his way awkwardly towards the aisle, she moved faster than the human eye could see just so she could see the shock on his face when he saw her waiting for him. She hit him before he could make up his mind on what to do, shivering at the sight of his blood pouring out of his nose like a fountain. She was only halfway done draining him before his girlfriend's screams made it just too damn annoying to continue with her meal. So before she tossed him away, she rooted through his pockets and grabbed his wallet then walked off towards the exit door to emerge into overcast skies.
She really hoped it wouldn't rain cause she didn't feel like getting any more depressed than she already was. And even though her spirits had lifted somewhat after leaving the movie theater, she wasn't what you'd call real happy right now. Tossing the wallet onto the passenger seat, she got in her car and just sat there, absentmindedly running her hands up and down the steering wheel. Her mind inevitably wandered to the one thing that was always in her waking thoughts and since she didn't need to sleep, that was pretty much all the time.
Buffy.
Sometimes, when she was starting to get sick of it, she thought about finding the other slayer and letting Buffy kill her. Most times though, she just wanted to find the other slayer and have it out already instead of playing this cat and mouse game which was getting tired fast. It had been two weeks and four days since Faith had escaped and since she still went about killing anybody and everybody she wanted with no more remorse than swatting a fly, she assumed that Willow hadn't been able to do her spell...or else the little witch *wouldn't* do it.
Hearing the sound of sirens off in the distance, she finally started the car and drove out of there, right past the first of the police cars that came roaring in from the opposite direction.
Faith stood peering down the side of the building. She was standing on the roof of a twenty story building, the wind playing havoc with her hair, the lights of the cars below looking like twinkling red and orange pinpricks, running together and forming a narrow stream of colorful ribbon. She'd sent out the word to every demon and vampire in this damn city that she would be here, waiting. If Buffy *were* trying to hunt her down like she thought, then the blonde would be here. Faith closed her eyes, feeling the stiff breeze trying to blow her back off the ledge a second before another breeze tried to blow her down.
She smirked as the heavy door behind her opened because she knew who it was without looking.
"Faith."
She loved how her name rolled off that tongue even when that word was said with so much disgust, it made her shiver. She twirled around and hopped nimbly off the edge, getting her first good look at Buffy since far too long. "I missed you," she said with a fond smile.
Buffy scowled, stating that "I didn't."
"Is that the way you want to play it?" Faith's smile had all but disappeared as a hurt expression replaced it. Whether it was genuine or not, only she would know. "Do you want to play around with lies? Cause I can do that just fine. Probably better than you can."
The blonde remained silent, her fists balled and her eyes glued to every move the other girl made.
Faith hated the silent routine. It made her feel like what she had to say wasn't even important enough for a reply. She hated it when she was alive and she hated it just as much now. "Don't tell me you're not lying cause I know it went both ways. You *did* love me. You *do*. I can feel it and nothing you can say will make it any different." She shouted, trying to make her voice heard above the howling of the wind.
Buffy walked with a purpose towards the brunette and when she got close enough, ran one hand into the other girl's dark locks, pulling gently on her head so that Faith's ear was next to her mouth before whispering, "You don't know shit, Faith." Her other hand had already drawn a knife and she slashed the steel across the other girl's throat, allowing the squirt of blood to spray her own face.
Faith backed up, her mouth gaping open and her hand immediately clamping down on her bloodied throat. The wound healed within a few seconds but it hurt like shit.
Buffy smiled for the first time that night. "That was for Willow," she said, shaking off the blood from her knife.
As soon as the gaping slash on her throat had healed, Faith spat out, "And how is the pagan bitch? I hope she liked my parting gift as much as I liked giving it." She started grinning again as Buffy's eyes immediately narrowed. "Does this remind you of something?" She asked, looking around. "You with a knife? Us on a roof? Are you going to push me off again and call it justified?"
"Guess what Faith? It *was* justified. And, no, I'm not going to do that again." She threw the knife away, taking out a stake from inside her jacket. "I'm going to stake you and watch you turn to dust. This is going to end tonight."
They both knew the truth of it. One of them would have to die on that roof because as big as the world was, it wasn't big enough for the both of them, not if they weren't on the same page, not if they weren't even in the same book.
"Well, then take me down!" Faith yelled, spreading her arms wide as if to say 'here I am'.
Buffy didn't wait for a second invitation as she rushed in with her stake leading the way which was easily blocked but she quickly followed up with a kick to the other girl's stomach which sent Faith stumbling back. She tried pressing her advantage even more with a flying kick at the head but Faith sidestepped, grabbing onto the hem of her shirt as she flew past and pulling down hard. Buffy landed on her back and rolled to the side just as a foot came stomping down where her head had just been. She rolled into a crouched position, springing backwards to avoid a spin kick. They both paused, looking at each other. A feral grin spread across Faith's face as she watched Buffy carefully take off her shirt which was torn up in the back to reveal the black tanktop she had underneath. Buffy didn't return the smile, only throwing the shirt to the side and resuming a fighting stance.
"Face it, B. You don't want to kill me. If you did, you could've done it a long time ago. But I'm still here."
"You're here now because I felt sorry for you Faith," Buffy spit out. "That was all it was. Pity. You were a charity case to me before and you're less than nothing to me now."
Faith got that expression on her face, the same one she'd gotten when Buffy had told her that the reason why everybody had forgotten about her while she was in that eight month coma was because they had *wanted* to. Her blank expression was made all the more bleak by her eyes which had grown almost black as the pupils grew larger, blocking out nearly all the white.
Then without notice, Faith charged in with a lightning fast series of jabs which drove the blonde back with the sheer force of them. But one of her jabs was caught in Buffy's hands and before she could wrench free, her face came into crushing contact with an elbow several times. Her captive hand was finally released so she could stumble backwards, almost falling onto her knees in the process. Her legs were suddenly not supporting her anymore as Buffy swept them out from underneath her and she found herself on her back, staring straight up into the night sky. For a brief moment, she wished she could see the stars. And for a brief moment, she thought she could.
She almost wanted Buffy to kill her then. She almost welcomed the release but there was something in her that just wouldn't give up, that wouldn't lie there and accept death. Her hand came up, grabbing onto the sharp end of the stake that was making its way to her heart. Buffy's face came swam into view above her, a grimace of determination lighting up those hazel eyes as she pushed down harder on the stake.
"I always knew you liked it on top," Faith smirked with a grunt as the stake started to dig painfully into her flesh. "I just wish we had more time B. I thought we had forever. Turns out we barely had a month."
Buffy's eyes never changed as more pressure was applied to the weapon. But right before the point when Faith would have burst into a pile of dust, she pulled abruptly back and got up. "Fuck! Why does it always have to be this way? I know you feel, Faith. I know you hurt. I know you love. You're different from other vampires, don't you see that?" She threw her stake away in frustration. "You don't need me to give you a soul. You already have one."
Faith laid still, allowing the words to sink in before she burst out laughing. She rolled onto her side, clutching the wound on her chest as her eyes began tearing up. "You've got to be fucking kidding me," she finally wheezed out as the laughter subsided and she turned to look at Buffy who had stood there the whole time with a freaking serious expression on her face. "B, you've seen me. If I had a soul, I wouldn't be out there doing what I'm doing and I wouldn't be loving every second of it."
"I'm not so sure Faith. Do you really love it or are you just lying to yourself?"
"Hell no. Of course I love it." The brunette stood up as she stepped a little closer to Buffy. "You've been there. You know how it is, the rush, the mind-blowing feeling of freedom, nothing holding us down, nothing stopping us--I know you miss it."
"All I miss is my life Faith. Instead of being grateful for what I had, I treated it like it was some kind of chore and now..."
"Now you're screwed."
"No," Buffy said immediately. "Not if I don't want it to be that way. Faith, we make our own choices, we create our own destinies."
"Yeah," Faith replied scoffing. "Just like you right? As I remember it, you had no choice in the matter when Red grabbed your soul and shoved it down your throat. As I remember it, you were pretty damn happy just the way you were, a killer, like me."
Buffy was silent for a few moments and Faith took that to mean she was right and the blonde didn't have an argument against her logic. However, that particular state of ignorance didn't last too long. "You're right about one thing. Willow *did* give me back my soul but it didn't take." Buffy looked thoughtful as her mind went back to the incident. "For a couple of days, at least, I had it back. And it was...so miserable. I felt everything I'd done coming back at me and it hurt. I can't tell you how much it hurt. But then, just like that, it was gone again. And I had to make a choice. Do I kill Willow like I really, really wanted to for making me feel like total shit? Or do I try to make up for what I'd done, for what I let myself do?"
Faith was struck speechless as she tried to make sense of what Buffy was saying. "You're shitting me," she sputtered out, walking over and grabbing the blonde's arms in a tight grip. "Red's spell didn't work? You don't have a soul? Then what the fuck were you doing trying to kill me and acting like Captain Good Girl?"
"If I were trying to kill you," Buffy replied blandly. "You'd already be dead. But that's not the point. The point is that you do have a choice. You've always had a choice because you're not just a mindless killing machine. You just need someone to remind you of that once in awhile. We don't need to let the demon control us, Faith. We're stronger than that."
"You're a fucking lunatic Buff. What are you playing at?"
"You can do two things. You can go on killing and murdering everyone that you don't like, who looks at you funny, or just cause you feel like it. Or you can stop."
"Stop?" Faith scrunched up her face in disbelief. "I can't just stop. I like it too much."
"If I can stop, you can stop. And I don't mean stop completely. Of course not. What do you think I am? Mother Teresa? You can still kill the people who deserve it and of course, you can do whatever you want with demons and vampires. They don't count anyway."
Now it was Faith's turn to look thoughtful. She only really had one question on her mind. "So, if I do all this...you're gonna have sex with me, right?"
Buffy laughed, a light, airy sound which caused a shiver to start running up and down Faith's spine. The blonde closed the distance between them again, rubbing her body against the other girl's. "Riiiight," she said, sensuously drawing out the word and pulling the other girl down for a kiss.
EPILOGUE
It wasn't like she suddenly woke up and became a Girl Scout. Faith still did what she'd been doing but she only did it to the people who deserved it. The only problem was that Faith's idea of deserving it and Buffy's idea of deserving it and Willow's idea of deserving it rarely, if ever matched. And there was also the fact that Faith and Willow couldn't stand to be in the same room with each other which kinda made it hard for Buffy's 'let's go team' concept to work out.
It was still hard for the two former slayers to control their demons. Maybe they were never meant to act like this, to go against their nature. But unless something drastic happened to change things, they would stay the course because Buffy wanted it and Faith wanted whatever Buffy wanted. Whether that was to destroy the world or to protect it, didn't really matter to her all that much.