In the Waiting Line
by meetwickedfaith
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: All courtesy of Mr Whedon et al. Thank you kindly for
the loan – are you sure I can't just keep `em on the end of my bed??
No? Oh alright then.
Notes, Spoilers, Feedback: Set after Season 7 so anything goes up
until there. The first tentative part of my first fic so any
comments would be muchly appreciated (oh and I have no idea how much
drinks cost in America so just take it as meaning that it's a damn
pricey club). // denotes thought.
"That'll be $12" the girl yelled over the thumping bass.
"$12! For one lousy drink?!" the young man yelled back.
"I don't make the rules, I just pour the drinks" she replied still yelling and feeling decidedly pissed off at how sore her throat was getting from working in this place.
"Sheesh, I gotta start hanging out in scummier clubs or I'm gonna go bankrupt" he said as he handed the girl a $20 bill and strode off towards the dancefloor.
Looking down at the note in her hand she wondered why he had bothered to complain about the price of the drink and then leave her an $8 tip.
"Oh well, all the better for me" she thought as she shoved the tip into her jean pocket.
She was just turning back round to face the mass of people that were leaning over the bar in an attempt to get served, when she felt something wash over her so strong that the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end and she had to grasp the edge of the bar in an effort to keep her knees from buckling. There were only two things that could invoke such a powerful physical reaction in her and she was acutely aware of how different the feelings were. She whipped her head round and scanned the packed club looking left and right till her eye fell on the exit door. What she saw disappearing out of the door made her breath catch in her throat.
"HEY ARE YOU DEAF OR JUST STUPID?! I said, can I get a fucking drink around here or what?!"
She was roughly pulled from her trance-like state by a sea of faces looking at her like she had grown an extra head. For a few seconds she just stared back at them until she realised that she had lost her train of thought. Darting her eyes frantically back to the now closed door she felt something stir inside of her.
"WELL?!!!" the man yelled in her face again.
She gave him a slight smile and yelled back "Or what". She placed a hand on the glass bar top and leapt over it, accidentally landing on the already very disgruntled man's foot causing him to scream in pain.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Gotta run" she shouted out to the startled onlookers behind her as she ran to the door pushing and shoving as she went.
Bursting out into the cool night air she turned and scanned up the alley, and for the second time that night her breath caught in her throat. The figure of a girl was walking slowly away, having almost reached the main street at the end of the alley. But as she looked on at the dwindling figure her insides felt like they were being torn in two, with one half of her desperate to call out and the other half wanting to drag her running in the other direction. But just as she had decided to turn and run, the decision was taken out of her hands as the girl in the distance stopped suddenly. Pausing for a moment she then turned round to face back down the alley and stare right into the other girl's eyes. They both stood like that for what felt like forever, just staring at each other with both their respective hearts thundering in their chests. And then in an instant the girl in the distance turned and was gone.
Her head felt like it was going to implode and everything inside of it was telling her not to follow, but something deeper inside of her wouldn't let her not. She took off down the alley, reaching the end quicker than any sprinter, and barrelled out into the street that was busy with late night revellers.
"Fuck, fucking fuck" she muttered to herself as she dodged between the crowds trying to see ahead to where she guessed the person she was pursuing was. And then she saw her.
As the crowds parted for a moment, there she was, running on the other side of the street further ahead and then disappearing again as she dropped down over the breaker wall onto the sand below.
She pushed out onto the road and was vaguely aware of the blaring of horns as she narrowly missed being hit by two cars, her only focus being on the girl she was chasing. Peering along the beach she saw the girl running hard by the shoreline and realised she was going to lose this chase. There was no way she could catch up with her now, she had gained too much distance, unless………She quickly tried to remember her relatively limited knowledge of the area, but no, she was almost certain that the only way off that beach was a set of stairs that led up to near where her apartment was, and if she was lucky with the crowds she could make it there before the other girl. Particularly as she knew running on sand was a definite hindrance to your speed as opposed to nice solid sidewalk.
She took off again, her mind becoming sharp and focused, dodging the oncoming club kids that were spilling out of the buildings lining the street, with a grace and agility that would have amazed anyone who watched, that is if anyone had been bothering to watch.
And as she ran she thought about why in the hell she was actually running at all. About why she was now rapidly running towards the thing that she had tried so hard to run away from for all this time.
These thoughts were brought to an abrupt halt as she turned a corner and smashed head on into something. A loud crack filled the humid night air as blonde hair tangled with brown, and the last thought that filled her head before she slipped into unconsciousness seemed to echo around her empty mind.
"Faith…….....".
2 years earlier………..
"I don't fucking understand! Why do you have to leave?! Why the fuck do you have to run away?!"
"I'm not running away. I just have to leave. I can't…………....stay. I just can't." Buffy replied, turning away from Faith and looking out at the lights of the city.
She always felt so comforted up here on the roof of the hotel. Even though Los Angeles no longer felt like home for her, she still seemed to be able to draw some strength from all the lights that twinkled beneath them. And strength was what she desperately needed right now. She hadn't wanted it to go this way. She hadn't actually wanted it to go any way at all to be quite honest. She had planned on slipping away without so much as a word to anyone. The letters to each of her friends had been carefully written that night, each one as individual as the person it was intended for. No apologies, just the honest truth. Well, almost. But of course, even the most simple plans can come apart at the seams when you let your guard drop for just a moment. She was just about to leave; her bag was packed, her room empty of all the things that had made it hers. The heels of her boots echoed through the bare space as she made her way to the door. As she bent to pick up her bag, she felt the need to go up to the roof one last time, for one last look, she thought to herself. And that was when her simple plan had started to fray. But in a funny way she wasn't surprised. Faith always seemed to know what her next move was going to be, what she was feeling. Sometimes it felt like she knew even before Buffy did.
So that was how Buffy now found herself in the aching position of having the other slayer shout at her. Faith had gone looking for Buffy and had found the packed bag in the middle of the empty room, and had then somehow knew that she would find her up here. When she had asked Buffy what was going on, why were her things packed, Buffy had replied that she was leaving LA, leaving California.
"But why B? I don't get it. Just outta the blue you decide to up and leave and by the looks of it, without saying a god damn word to any of us?"
The look of pain in Faith's eyes was almost too much for Buffy as she turned to look at her again. She truly was at a loss for what to say.
"I……....I left letters for everyone" she offered, feeling ashamed at how lame it sounded.
"Oh gee B. You left letters?! Fuck me. That's wicked thoughtful of you" Faith shot back sarcastically. "So what exactly did you say in these letters? 'Hey Willow, By the time you read this I'll be long gone. I never said goodbye to you cos I couldn't be bothered. See you around, Buffy'. Do they go something like that huh B?"
"No….....…no they don't. It's nothing to do with not being bothered Faith! I love my friends and it's killing me to leave at all never mind like this. But it's just the way I have to do it so don't stand there and tell me this is easy for me!"
"So where's my letter then? Have you got it there? Were you just gonna slip it under my door on your way out or something cos I haven't seen anything in my room?" Faith asked accusingly, crossing her arms defensively over her chest.
Buffy cast her eyes down to the ground and silently wished she didn't have to have this conversation.
"I didn't write you one" she replied almost inaudibly.
When she looked up again she started to doubt everything about the decision she was making, as what she saw in Faith's face made her heart feel like it was splitting in two. The dark haired slayer's eyes had filled with tears but none had fallen yet. She looked so hurt.
So incredibly hurt, Buffy thought. How ironic that whenever I seem to hurt Faith the most we're on a fucking roof, she mused almost laughing to herself.
"Please listen though Faith, it's not what you think. I wanted to write you one, I wanted to tell you, but I…....I, oh shit I don't know. I didn't have the right words I guess. I was planning on writing you eventually." As the words tumbled out of Buffy's mouth she felt like she was falling because everything she was saying was coming out completely wrong and clearly making things worse.
"Eventually? Eventually B?" Faith closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "I have to go now" she said as she opened her eyes "And I guess so do you" she motioned towards Buffy. "I wouldn't want to hold you up." She started to walk towards the roof door.
"Faith! Faith please! You don't understand. I know you're thinking it's because I don't care but I……...…." Buffy faltered as Faith turned towards her.
"What B? What is it then? Yeah I think you don't give a shit cos if you did, you sure as hell wouldn't be running away without any explanation. And yeah, I'm big enough to admit that it fucking hurts that you've bothered to pen everyone else but me a sweet little parting note. So what is it then?!" she shouted back at Buffy.
Buffy's mind was doing somersaults, screaming in her head what she wanted to say. But she couldn't, not now, not after everything.
"I don't want to leave it like this Faith" she replied calmly "I don't want……...…..I don't want any bad feeling between us."
Faith just stared at her. Not angrily, but with a sort of glazed expression of sadness.
"Hey don't worry, there's no bad feeling here. I've……....…gotta go. I've gotta meet Robin now" Faith spoke almost absentmindedly "He'll be waiting for me. Take care Buffy." Faith turned and walked slowly out the door and as she began to run down the stairs, heard Buffy screaming for her to wait, to come back. But the tears had started pouring down her face and she knew she just had to get away.
As Buffy watched Faith get in her car and speed off down the street, she felt the overwhelming need to drop to her knees and sob her heart out. But she knew if she did that then the little momentum she still had left would disappear and she would never leave. So she forced the lump in her throat back down and went to collect her bag.
Standing outside the house that they had all made a home together, she looked up at it and tried to fill her mind with happy thoughts about all the good times she'd had there. But she knew, deep down she knew, that she wasn't satisfied, wasn't able to be truly happy when the one thing she was good at was no longer the same and the one person she wanted was out of her grasp.
"And that's why I have to leave, Faith" she thought to herself as she put her things in the back of her car. "Cos I want to be happy."
Turning on the ignition Buffy realised she had no idea where she was going to go, but this thought was almost comforting in a way.
"Like endless possibilities" she said outloud to her reflection in the rear-view mirror and was surprised to see tears were streaming down her face.
She drove off, never looking back, trying to look forward to whatever that may be.
2 years later……….....
A loud crack filled the night air as blonde hair tangled with brown………………......
"AAAAHHHHH!" Faith cried as she crashed into something at full speed. As she was knocked backwards by the force of the collision, she knocked her head off a nearby wall and fell to the ground.
"Fucking hell. Arrrggghhh that fucking hurts" she mumbled, rubbing her head and attempting to sit up.
As she focused her vision she saw a blonde girl lying facedown by the kerb a few feet away. Scrambling over to the lifeless body, Faith knew it was Buffy before she even turned her over. Blood was pooling around Buffy's head, spilling from a deep gash at her hairline.
"Oh my god, Buffy! Buffy, wake up!" Faith screamed, shaking Buffy for a response. She pressed her hand to the wound to try and stem the bleeding and pulled Buffy on to her lap.
"C'mon B, wake up, wake up." Faith was starting to panic. She hadn't come all this way to knock Buffy out. Or worse, her mind was saying.
"No no no. Not gonna happen. Come on B! Wake up, please wake up." Tears started streaming down Faith's face "Please wake up Buffy, please."
Just when she was realising that she should try to get Buffy to a hospital she felt her stir slightly in her arms.
"Oh my God Buffy! Are you ok? Try to stay awake Buffy" she said frantically, sobs wracking her body.
As Buffy slowly came to, she saw Faith's face peering down at her and couldn't for the life of her remember what had happened for her to get here.
"Hey, what's with the tears?" she asked Faith groggily, "And why are you calling me Buffy?"
At this Faith started crying even harder and gripping onto Buffy, "Oh my God, you can't remember your name!"
"What? What are you talking about? My name is Buffy Summers. I'm just wondering why you're calling me Buffy and not B."
Faith's eyes widened, "Oh thank fuck. I thought you'd lost your memory or something. And what do you mean why am I calling you Buffy? I was calling you that cos you just happened to be out cold and I was trying to get some response!" she said almost laughing.
"Okaaaaay……...I may have a slight memory loss issue going on cos I have no idea why I was passed out" Buffy replied.
"That would be due to the frickin big hole in your head that you got from this nice sidewalk here Buffy, I mean B" Faith said motioning to the gash on her forehead.
Buffy raised her hand to her head and quickly withdrew it, making a gasping sound. It was as if she hadn't felt the pain before because she hadn't known it was there.
"I think you're gonna need stitches B. It looks pretty bad. I'll go try find a cab to take us to the hospital" Faith made a move to stand up but Buffy grabbed on to her arms.
"No. No hospitals Faith. I just need to get home. My apartment is just around the corner. Help me up and I'll be fine."
Her tone sounded quite desperate and Faith was confused as to why Buffy wouldn't want to go to the hospital.
"But you need stitches. It looks really deep. Plus you were out for quite a while, you could have concussion or something."
"I've been out for a lot longer than that before Faith, I'll be fine. But if it really does need stitches then I'll do them myself. I've got the stuff at home to do the job, just help me up."
"Uhh…....if you're sure B. Come on then."
Faith gently lifted Buffy's small frame to her feet and found herself face to face with the other slayer. A strange but comfortable silence fell between the two as they just looked at each other, studying each other.
Buffy broke the silence "Ok, actually, I knew I was missing something. Like some fucking huge, gaping mother fucking hole in the proceedings! What the hell are you doing here?!" she sort of cried through laughter.
Dizziness then washed over her and her knees went beneath her. Faith caught her round the waist before she could fall.
"I think explanations can wait till we get you back home B."
"I'm thinking you could be right. It's this way. Just give me a minute" Buffy said trying to gain her balance again.
"Ummm B? I could carry you, you know. I don't think you're in any fit state to walk right now" Faith ventured.
Buffy looked up at Faith and saw apprehension in her eyes.
"Could you manage it?" she asked.
"Hello? Slayer? Kinda like an elephant carrying an ant" Faith answered with a laugh. And with that she scooped Buffy up and started off in the direction of the apartment.
"Just keep me right ok B."
"Uh yeah, just head up here and turn left" Buffy replied with some difficulty. She felt so tired and her head was throbbing, but she felt so safe and comfortable in Faith's arms. Her head was resting on Faith's shoulder and she felt like her senses were being overwhelmed by how good the brunette smelled.
"So when did you learn language like that B?" Faith asked teasingly whilst walking.
"Like what?" Buffy asked trying to focus on her face.
"Like back there when you said fucking, then mother fucking, rounded off with a nice hell at the end!"
"Yeah well, pretty momentous event calls for extreme language" Buffy laughed softly,"I've probably picked up a few bad habits since you saw me last" she said more seriously.
Faith didn't say anything but just continued walking, shifting Buffy's weight slightly.
"What number is it B?"
"Huh?" Buffy felt like she was dropping off to sleep.
"What street number?" Faith asked again gently.
"Oh right. It's 125. Top floor…....sorry. I can probably just walk up the stairs."
"Haven't even broken a sweat yet B so you're not gonna be walking anywhere" Faith replied striding up to the main entry door and kicking it open.
When she started taking the stairs two at a time Buffy whispered in her ear "Still such a show off."
"Yeah well some things never change" Faith replied keeping her composure, "Can you pass me your keys out?" she asked as they reached the top floor.
Faith would have described it as a kind of warehouse type place. Pretty raw looking, but somewhere that would probably be inhabited by trendy arty types. Not really B's style at all, she thought to herself. But as she pushed the door open and got a look at the inside there was no mistaking it was Buffy's place. It just fitted her. Everything was intrinsically B. It was pretty small and there appeared to only be one room, besides the bathroom which Faith assumed was through the door to the right. There was a double bed over to the left and a couch on the other wall. All Faith could see of a kitchen area was a microwave and a small fridge. It was pretty basic but had a nice feel to it. Of course it does, Faith thought to herself, B lives here. There was a nice throw over the couch and some cushions on the bed. Buffy had obviously tried her best to make it as homely as possible.
"Umm Faith? Are you ok? You can put me down now."
Faith realised that she'd been standing in the doorway, staring into Buffy's apartment and completely forgetting that she was still holding her.
"Uh yeah, shit. Sorry B, just kinda spaced there" she said placing Buffy gently down on her feet.
"I know it's not much to look at but considering the wages I get, this is like the Hilton compared with some of the places I saw" Buffy said, slowly making her way over to the bathroom door.
"No. I mean no, that wasn't what I was thinking. It's a pretty cool little place actually B. You've made it look nice" Faith replied quickly, realising that her staring must have seemed rude.
"Hey, what you doing in there B?" Faith could see Buffy wincing in pain as she attempted to bend down.
"Just getting the stitchy stuff" Buffy replied grabbing the side of the sink as a wave of nausea took hold. "Jesus, I really did a number on myself. Haven't felt this pain for a long time."
Faith entered the small bathroom. "Here, let me. Sit down before you fall down" she said to Buffy in a commanding tone as she put the toilet seat down and gently guided Buffy to sit on it. The older girl leant back and closed her eyes trying to focus on the cool tile against the back of her head.
"There should be a first aid box of sorts in the cabinet under the sink" she said almost dreamily, still with her eyes closed.
"Yeah I got it B."
Buffy was startled at how close Faith's voice was, and was surprised to see her kneeling in front of her when she opened her eyes.
"How's your stitching cos I don't think double vision is compatible with minor surgical procedures on your own face" Buffy asked with a smile.
"You're the one that didn't wanna go to the hospital so you'll just have to make do with me. Don't worry, I won't make you look like the Bride of Frankenstein or anything" Faith replied smiling up into Buffy's eyes despite herself.
The wound had stopped gushing and the blood had caked in places, so Faith cleaned it the best she could with some antiseptic liquid before she got to work on the stitches.
She was trying her very best to concentrate on the work at hand and not look at Buffy. Well that's a lie because she was looking at Buffy's head the whole time, but she was avoiding anything below the eyebrows.
"You've changed your hair" Buffy said softly.
Faith jumped a little as she had actually thought Buffy had maybe been sleeping because she'd been so quiet. She adjusted the needle in her hand and continued.
"Uh yeah. I just got some highlights put through it" Faith replied staying composed.
"It looks nice" Buffy said and closed her eyes again. She had to close her eyes because not only did her head hurt like hell, but she was having a hard time being this close to Faith after two years and keeping her cool.
"Thanks" said Faith softly as she briefly stopped to look at Buffy with her eyes closed before shaking her head slightly and continuing with the task.
All both slayers could think was how in the hell did they start the conversation that was inevitably to come. So many questions and explanations would be wanted, thought Buffy.
Two years had passed. What had Buffy been doing in all this time, thought Faith. Would she still be the same person? Would she even want to talk to her, the person that she wasn't even going to bother saying goodbye to?
As Faith tied off the last stitch she realised that Buffy had drifted off to sleep with her head against the wall. She knew that it wasn't a good idea to let her sleep after such a heavy knock to the head but decided to lift her through to the bed anyway.
As she lay her down she whispered in Buffy's ear "B, I don't know whether you should sleep or not. I'm scared that it's the wrong thing to do."
Buffy stirred and opened her eyes "I'll be ok Faith, I promise. I just have to sleep for a while, I'm so tired."
"Ok. But maybe I should stay. Then that way I could keep an eye on you while you sleep. Don't want you running off again after I've come all this way" Faith replied smiling.
"I seem to remember it was you running last night" said Buffy returning the smile.
"We'll talk about it in the morning B. You should get some rest now. I'll be right over here on the couch."
"Sorry, can't keep my eyes open. Need to sleep……." And with that Buffy had drifted off into a deep sleep.
Faith turned off the overhead light leaving the room in darkness and sat herself on the small couch. She made a decision to stay awake as she was still weary of whether Buffy should be sleeping or not. In the quietness of the room she could hear the steady breathing of the other girl and was comforted. As her mind wondered to past times with the other slayer, her eyes eventually became heavy, until finally she succumbed to sleep.
The only sound that could be heard was the occasional passing car, and that of the two slayers breathing quietly in perfect unison.
"Uh huh...pfffft...mmrrpph.....nooo.....whaa.....BUFFYY!!!!!!!!"
"Huh? What? What is it?" Buffy leapt out of bed and into a fighting stance ready to pummel whatever had woken her from her deep sleep. Instead her eyes fell on a startled looking Faith sitting bolt up- right on the couch. Buffy noticed the sweat that glistened on her face and chest and the panicked look in her eyes.
"Are you alright? What happened Faith?" she asked, lowering her fists and moving to stand in front of the other girl.
Faith slowly raised her eyes up to Buffy and gradually began to relax herself again, sinking back into the couch.
Rubbing her forehead, she replied, "Just a bad dream....aarghh I hate those. Too fucking real."
"You nearly gave me a heart attack. Being woken up by someone screaming my name isn't something I'm used to" Buffy said, and then quickly started babbling that she didn't mean it in that way, and that it hadn't sounded like that in her head, as Faith gave her a mischievous grin.
"Don't sweat it B. I said bad dream, not good." As soon as she'd spoken the words she wished she could take them back. She didn't want to start off that way, didn't want to slip back into that old, innuendo-steeped banter. Those days were gone and after all, she was majorly pissed at B! //No flirting, goddammit Faith. She's not getting off that easily.//
Buffy looked away trying not to smile. Sitting down beside Faith, she turned to face her.
"So what was it about then?" she asked, absentmindedly rubbing at her sleepy eyes.
//Stop looking so fucking adorable Buffy. You know you're doing it. Actually you probably don't know at all. Just makes it more adorable. Fuck! Stop it.//
"Just you not waking up. You know.....concussion, shouldn't be sleeping, me trying to get you to wake up in that slow-mo dreamy kinda way. But you were dead."
"Gee, that's cheery" Buffy said, exhaling loudly.
"That was like Christmas Day with cherries on top compared with the shit I usually dream about" Faith replied, trying to make her tone sound light.
"Yeah well, tell your sub conscience it has nothing to worry about cos your screaming has clearly stopped me from dying" Buffy said smiling at Faith.
Faith was giving Buffy an anxious look, glancing at her head wound.
"Faith....? I'm fine" Buffy said nudging her with her elbow "See, alive and kicking. No need to worry. Maybe I should be worrying about you though......you're drenched in sweat and you're about 10 shades paler than your usual heroin chic colour."
"Hey! I'm not that pale. Don't get out in the sun much in this line of work ya know. And seeing as I'm not really partial to St. Tropez......unlike some of us" she mumbled under her breath.
"Whaaat! I DO NOT use St. Tropez! Where did you get that idea from?" Buffy said in a half hearted outraged tone.
Faith burst out laughing at the look on Buffy's face and couldn't believe she had had the nerve to say that to the almighty B.
"Awww, come off it B! You're trying to tell me that whole time in Sunnydale that was just a 'natural glow' you had?! You hardly ever went outside in the day.....ever!"
"That is so not true. And yes, this is my natural glow actually. And I try and spend a lot more time in the sun now. Look….I'll prove it" Buffy replied standing up and pushing her pants down a bit.
"Woah there B. What you doing?!" Faith said leaning back in her seat unsure of what Buffy was up to.
"Chill F" Buffy replied with narrowed eyes, "Don't get all excited, just showing you my TAN lines. NATURAL tan lines."
Faith took a quick glance at Buffy's exposed hip before looking away. //Fuck, I missed this. Giving B a hard time. I forgot how much fun all the verbal sparring was.//
"Yeah yeah. I see Smarty Pants. Just yanking your chain B. Can't resist seeing that look on your face and hearing your voice go all high and screechy" Faith said smirking.
"Whatever" Buffy said in mock meanness, sitting back down. After a few moments she said, "I missed you Faith."
Silence. Faith was looking straight ahead, seemingly at nothing.
//Ok. Obviously not what she wants to hear. Shit Buffy, think of something else to say.//
Buffy was starting to feel really awkward when Faith said, "What time is it?"
"Uhh….." Buffy glanced over at the microwave clock, "4:23."
"I really need a smoke. I'm just gonna go downstairs" Faith said starting to get up.
"Oh, you don't have to do that. Just go out on the balcony."
Faith turned to look at the only window, "Balcony?" she asked raising her eyebrow.
"Well that could be a tad too fancy a word for it, but yeah, come see" Buffy replied, getting up and walking past Faith to the window.
She drew back the curtain and lifted the window open, stepping over the frame and disappearing through the small space.
"Very nice B" Faith said as she came out after Buffy. "Pretty good view you've got too."
It was just a small space really, that led to the brick fire escape but it looked directly onto the beach over the street.
"Yeah it's my favourite thing about living here. Just don't stand on that corner there cos I think it's about to give way" Buffy said smiling, "It's hardly five star living."
"Never was one for fancy shit B, you know that" Faith replied, lighting a cigarette between her teeth, "Speaking of stars....man, that's some sky you've got up there....almost forgot what it looks like after living in LA for so long."
Looking up, Buffy asked "Can I get one of those?"
She felt Faith's eyes on her and waited for the inevitable incredulous remarks. But they never came. Instead Faith just reached in her jacket and passed Buffy the pack. And they stood like that; leaning against the railing, smoking a cigarette for the first time in front of each other and listening to the sound of the ocean beneath them. It was weird, but it was nice, they both thought to themselves.
"I didn't know you smoked" Buffy said, looking at Faith as she stubbed out her cigarette.
"Well how could you. I only started this year" Faith replied in a slightly bitter tone.
"Oh" Buffy mentally kicked herself. This had all been a bit easy so far and she had stupidly let herself think that they could avoid any confrontational talks.
Faith noticed the look that passed over Buffy's face and realised that she must have sounded bitchy. She didn't want to go down that road particularly. Well that wasn't entirely true. In a lot of ways she wanted to scream and shout at Buffy until she couldn't scream any longer. But she knew there was no point in that. She hadn't come all this way just for that.
"I'm sure you'll realise it's far more of a shocker for me to find out that you smoke B" Faith ventured in a light voice, attempting to make her fellow slayer feel better.
Buffy's eyes twinkled in the moonlight as she looked at Faith. "I don't. I just felt like it there. Seemed like the thing to do."
"Yeah it did" Faith said, looking back at Buffy. "How's your head feeling?" she asked, nodding towards it.
"A lot better thanks. That sleep really helped. And speaking of…......" Buffy trailed off.
"Yeah, must be about 5 by now. I should probably go and get my car, get checked into a motel" Faith said, stifling a yawn.
"Just stay" Buffy said quietly.
"You want me to stay?" Faith asked, turning her head to look at the sky again.
"Yeah, I do. Come inside" Buffy swung her leg over the frame and went back inside.
"Did you sleep alright?" Buffy asked, taking a sip of her coffee.
"I guess so" Faith replied, her eyes following a passing rollerblader.
They were sitting outside a beachfront café where they'd come for breakfast on Buffy's suggestion. Faith was now growing impatient to hear some answers but knew that Buffy was deliberately procrastinating.
"So are we gonna do this or what? Cos I didn't come here for tea" Faith said, a slight edge to her voice.
"It's coffee, not tea" Buffy replied.
"Whatever. Don't be fucking trite Buffy, I really ain't in the mood."
"God things do change. You're saying things like "trite"" Buffy said, smiling slightly.
This however, did not raise a smile from the dark haired girl, who instead fixed her counterpart with a steely glare. Sighing, Buffy pushed her sunglasses back onto her head, carefully avoiding her stitches, and sat back in her chair. A feeling of mild dread descended on her.
"I think I'll start with the easier stuff for now. You know, to get the ball rolling."
Faith simply nodded, indicating for Buffy to continue.
"Ok, so…….this is where I live…….obviously. I've been living here for about six months, which is pretty much the longest I've stayed in the one place since I left LA. You saw last night where I work. It's nothing amazing but the tips can be good and it suits me to work at night. I'm sure you can relate."
Faith smiled at this, giving Buffy some encouragement to go on.
"So I work, I swim in the sea, I eat when I have to and I sleep when my brain lets me. That's my life. Simple because that's the way I want it."
"And slaying? Does that fit into this simple lifestyle that defies what you are?" Faith asked, her voice laced with derision.
Casting her eyes to the table, Buffy hesitated in her response, "There's two other slayers in town…….they seem to be handling things."
Faith snorted, "Oh give me a break B. You are the slayer, it's about who you are, not how much you are or aren't needed in the fight."
"No Faith" Buffy responded tersely, "That's the whole point, I am not the slayer anymore, I'm just one of many."
"So what, you've just turned your back on your calling? On what you were built for? On everything you've, we've worked for?" Faith shot back, incredulous that this girl in front of her was the same Buffy Summers that defeated the First Evil and saved the world time and time again.
Buffy looked up at Faith, "You don't think I deserve a break, a normal life? I think I've paid my dues and I'm damn well entitled to pass the baton if that's what I want."
The conversation had quickly changed to a subject that was making Buffy increasingly agitated and as she reached for her coffee she knocked over the glass sugar dispenser, sending it crashing to the ground.
"Damn," she mumbled, bending down to pick up the larger shards of glass.
"That's alright miss, I'll get that" said a passing waitress who quickly returned with a brush to clean up the mess.
"If I really believed that's what you wanted, that you were happy right now….then I wouldn't be here B. If you can tell me that all the decisions you've made over these past few years have been the right ones, and have led you to a life you truly want….then I'll walk away from here right now" Faith offered, looking Buffy straight in the eye.
Buffy was so overwhelmed at how much Faith had grown up and matured since she had last seen her. She had changed a lot when she'd turned up in Sunnydale after her stint in jail, but the change in her now was even more apparent. She seemed so grounded and mellow, without a trace of the false bravado from her younger years. That cocky teenager had all but disappeared and been replaced with a really exceptional young woman. As Buffy mused over these changes she let her eyes roam over her fellow slayer and noted the physical differences too. She wouldn't have thought it would be possible but Faith had become even more beautiful. The bone structure of her face was more defined and she exuded a sort of effortless elegance. And her body…….well it looked to Buffy like she was in the best physical condition she'd ever seen her in, to say the least. She realised she was now blatantly staring at Faith and was dragged from her stupor by Faith saying her name.
"B? Earth to B? Have I lost you?"
Shaking her had slightly to clear her thoughts, Buffy answered, "Sorry, I just kinda zoned out there. And no, you haven't lost me Faith, evidently you've found me."
At this, she reached out and took Faith's hand, but only for a moment, because suddenly everything felt very strange and overwhelming. Faith could feel her withdrawing, the shift in her demeanour almost palpable.
"B?" she said softly.
Buffy did not look at her.
"B" she tried again, "Please look at me."
Buffy raised her eyes very slowly to meet hers and what Faith saw there almost made her reach over and take her in her arms. Her beautiful, soft, pure girl was in pain. So much pain was shining out from those green eyes. This answered Faith's question from before; Buffy was most definitely not happy, but all the reasons why, Faith was yet to find out.
"Let's go find a quiet spot on the beach" Faith said, throwing a twenty on the table as she stood.
As they walked near the shore, both slayers were quiet, listening to the sound of the surf and the gulls overhead. A little further along Faith took Buffy's hand and led them up the beach slightly where she placed her jacket on the sand for them to sit on. Turning to face her, taking her other hand as well, Faith began, "Ok, so here's the thing. I'm not gonna push you to talk to me or say anything you don't wanna say cos I know you must have your reasons. I mean, yeah…..two years of reasons. But at the same time this is hard for me. I'm really angry with you."
At this Buffy's face flushed and she looked away.
"But not in the way that I want to fight B" Faith continued, squeezing Buffy's hands slightly. "You have to understand though…..I haven't heard a word from you for two years. You leaving was so fucking confusing for me cos as far as I was concerned we were getting on better than we ever had. The only reason I knew you were dead or alive was through Dawnie."
"Did she tell you I was here?" Buffy interjected.
Faith let go of Buffy's hands to take a cigarette from the box in her jacket pocket.
"No, don't worry B, your little sis was loyal to you to the very last" she responded, lighting the cigarette and taking a long draw on it. "She only ever let me know you were ok and I never asked any more of her."
Buffy was gazing at the profile of Faith's mouth as she exhaled.
"Oh" she managed, "So how did you find me then?"
Faith let out a small laugh, "Bizarrely enough by chance. After trekking around this entire country for all this time it's pure fucking luck in the end that brought me into that club last night."
"Or maybe not" Buffy said.
"Yeah well I can't believe in anything but luck and chance anymore Buffy, cos I can't believe that fate would've put me through all this."
Buffy was so taken aback by Faith's honest tack that she found herself quite lost for words. She could only stare at the brunette as she kept her gaze fixed on the waves in front of them.
"I was ready to give up last night" Faith continued, "I decided I was never gonna find you and that maybe I wasn't meant to. So I went into that club with the sole intention of getting wasted before I headed back to LA."
Buffy laughed at this, breaking the tension slightly.
Faith laughed too, "Yup, I was getting off the Buffy train and going for some R&R…...or probably some J&D" she smirked, "I was getting bored of lookin for your sorry ass anyhow blondie" she finished, punching Buffy playfully on the arm.
Buffy's heart swelled a little at Faith's brighter tone and she felt a little hope.
"So why did you run out of there when you saw me then?" she asked.
"Cos I just about shit my pants" Faith replied, making Buffy smile, "I told you, I had given up, that was it, I was through……and then there you are, standing right in front of me. I dunno, I just panicked and before I knew it I was running away from you like it had been me running all along."
"So you didn't even know I worked there?" Buffy asked, surprised.
"Nope, no idea" Faith replied, "Some detective I make huh?"
Buffy smiled. "It's fairly ironic if you think about it."
"Yeah, ironic chance" said Faith, turning to look into the eyes that she'd dreamt about every night for two years.
...to be continued...