Dark Secret
by Paula
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine. Short, simple, direct... Oh, and the song from the
beginning is "Dark Secret" by Mathew Sweet. I HIGHLY recommend it.
Spoilers: Not much…After "Sanctuary".
"You are sickened by the weakness
Of a heart that's filled with fear
And if the world won't understand you
You can make it disappear
Cause there's a dark secret
You carry with you
Carry with you..."
Faith looked at her reflection in the dirty mirror of her most recent bathroom. She was used to doing that. For about 5 years she had been moving from place to place, never staying in the same spot for more than a couple of months. She couldn't move from LA, but she still enjoyed her (tiny) freedom. She had hit rock bottom. Or maybe even below that. Not that she was back to her crazy homicidal ways, but she just felt no reason to fight anymore. No reason to sigh when she got out of a fight alive and no reason to smile when she was coming back home from "work".
Work.
After she got out of jail 3 years before she was supposed to for good behavior (she found that highly amusing), she was stuck with community service. In a hospital. It wasn't that bad, all she really did was check up on patients, check their vital signs, call the nurses if something went wrong and follow their orders. They had put her with the comatose patients, maybe from fear she'd be a bad influence for those who were...well, awake. It didn't matter. She liked the peace and quiet and the fact that she didn't need to put up with whiny, sick people bitching and moaning in her ear during the 4 hours, 3 times a week she was there.
She brushed her teeth and pulled her hair up in a ponytail. She was wearing light makeup and a sheer lip gloss. She looked almost like a normal girl. But her eyes betrayed her cause they showed an unbelievable lack of emotion.
She got her jacket and keys and as she was locking up she remembered she was supposed to have dinner at Angel's tonight. They did that once a month and talked to each other on the phone weekly. He liked to check up on her and in a way she liked it too. He was the one that helped her when it came to money, and she was very thankful.
15 minutes after walking Faith got to the hospital. She got in, put on her white "ER outfit" (that's how she called it), wich she hated and went upstairs to the 3rd floor. Ms. Mclean greeted her on the hall and walked besides her.
"We have a new patient today."
"Oh, really?" she wasn't even remotely interested in this.
"Yeah, it's a young woman, just about your age. They found her in the cemetery with several broken ribs and a concussion. She had lost a lot of blood and her neck was severely bruised."
Faith stopped walking and looked at the other woman.
*Damn it* she thought *Even with me and Angel slaying...*
"Dr. Evans said you should stay there to check up on her. See if anything different happens. We're all pretty busy around here. But I don't think she'll be any trouble. She's been stable since last night. It's a wonder she's still alive."
"Okay.." Faith continued walking down the hall.
"She's on room 31-b" Ms. Evans shouted as she started to walk on the opposite direction.
Faith opened the door to the room and slowly made her way to the end of the bed to see the name of the patient. She picked it up and frowned, looking at the bed.
She gasped and accidentally dropped the girl's medical record:
NAME: UNKNOWN
But Faith knew pretty well the person's name.
Buffy Anne Summers.
Faith stood in front of the bed, speechless. Buffy was the last person she expected to see there. What the hell was she doing in LA? And why did she have no documents with her? She was probably going somewhere... Maybe she came to warn Angel of some big old evil and how they were in danger. She had to tell someone in Sunnydale...Did they know she was here? More and more unanswered questions filled her mind until Ms. McLean came running down the hall.
"Faith! What's wrong? I heard a noise..."
"I...I...dropped her file."
The woman picked the metal case and the file and looked up at Faith with a weird expression.
"My God, it looks like you just saw a ghost. Do you know this girl?"
"NO!! No way!! I mean....no...I don't. Have no clue who she is," she said shaking her head enthusiastically *Damn it Faith. You have to tell them*
But she didn't.
"Ummm...what will happen to her? Her chances, I mean..." Faith looked back to the bed.
"Well, her bruises are still pretty bad, but she's recovering very fast. I'd say she has very good chances of waking up in a few months. But she'll probably have some brain damage like amnesia or something."
"Amnesia? Like, not remembering stuff?"
"Yeah...but why are you asking the questions? You never really care about the medical part of your job."
Faith was staring at Buffy. She paid no attention to what the other was saying, just nodded her head. Ms. McLean sighed and left the room. When she saw that she was alone with Buffy, she closed the door and walked closer to the bed. Buffy looked pretty much the same she did the last time Faith saw her, 5 years ago. Her hair was shorter and her body was fuller. She was a woman now. But her face held the same innocence and beauty than the first time Faith laid eyes on her. She had dark circles under her eyes, a few cuts and bruises on her cheek and temple, but other than that she looked fine. She looked like she was sleeping peacefully. Faith leaned down and gave her a light kiss in the forehead, unknowingly repeating the same thing Buffy did for her when she was the one in a coma.
Faith spent her 4 hours of work in that room, monitoring Buffy and checking her blood pressure and such. She had felt guilty for not apologizing to Buffy for so long and now she felt like she had to help her. The doctor paid her a visit in the middle of the day while Faith went to eat something. She was still in shock from the news, but she didn't call anyone. Not Giles, not Buffy's mother... It was like she was trying to keep Buffy a secret. She knew it was a bad thing to do, but something inside her told her this was right.
She went home around 5 and took a long shower. She changed and went over to Angel's. She didn't know if she was going to tell him or not. It was all so new to her and she didn't how to handle it yet.
"Faith, hi." Angel answered the door with a friendly smile.
She nodded her head and mouthed a "hey" and entered the room.
"I just called to order food. I'm sorry, I couldn't do anything tonight I had some problems today. Is Chinese okay?"
"Sure...Whatever"
"What's wrong? You look worried..." Angel said as he got her coat and put it in the couch.
*Damn it! How does he do that??* She thought.
"It's nothing. Bad day at work today, that's all" she gave him a weak smile.
"What happened?" Angel asked as she sat down and turned on the TV.
She pretended not to hear him and he shrugged it off. If she didn't want to talk about it, he wasn't going to push. So, he headed to the kitchen.
A couple of minutes later the food arrived and they sat down to eat. Faith kept staring at her plate the whole time. Maybe if she didn't look directly at him, they wouldn't have to talk. But ironically, she was the one that made the move.
"Angel?" she asked
He looked up at her and she took a deep breath.
"Have you...heard about Buffy..lately?" she pretended to be asking a casual question but the subject was far too important to be taken lightly. He certainly didn't expect that question and she felt the tension building in the room.
"Well...sometimes I call Giles to check up on her...Why?"
"Nothing..." she looked back down at her plate. She couldn't tell him. She should, but she just didn't have the guts.
"Faith," he dropped his fork and looked at her "I think I know what's happening here"
She froze.
"You do?"
"Yes...You still have unresolved business with Buffy and it bothers you."
She sighed rather loudly and, at his weird expression, tried to fix it.
"Oh, I'm so relieved" she said "Because...I do...have un...unresolved business with B..uffy. Buffy. Whole lotta business. Yep. You're right"
"But I don't think that's such a good idea. If you two meet I have no idea what her reaction might be. You better wait a while...Maybe she'll come after you."
"Yeah...Maybe she will."
Deep inside Faith knew Angel was right. She had no idea how Buffy would react when she saw her and things might get even more complicated. But she couldn't pretend she didn't know. She couldn't leave Buffy behind in that hospital and pretend she didn't care again. After all, what were the chances of her waking up anytime soon? She'd have months to figure out what to do.
Back in the hospital, Buffy's eyes twitched for the first time.
The next few days, Faith tried to go to the hospital whenever possible. People that worked there were starting to wonder what was so special about the coma girl. Nobody asked, though...Faith was a very intimidating person and she didn't have that many friends at "work".
She had grown closer to Buffy (even though Buffy didn't know that) and talked to her, even though she knew she couldn't listen. Most of the time she talked about everyday stuff, about Angel and about how she missed the days when they were friends. She never touched the subject of their problems or how sorry she felt. She had changed so much in these last years and she wasn't sure what their relationship would be like when Buffy woke up.
"...and then I made this wicked new move and he was dead in a second."
Faith laughed as she finished telling the blonde one of her slaying stories. She stopped doing so, when she heard someone coming.
"Faith...hi. Didn't know you were working today."
"Yeah..well. I'm doing extra time, you know?" she smiled nervously and moved out of his way so he could examine Buffy.
"Has she done something different?" he asked while taking her pressures and examining her bruises.
"No. Not while I was here. Which wasn't for long, of course. How...how is she?"
"She seems to be stable. Her bruises are healing and her ribs are better. I'd say she'll recover pretty soon."
"You mean she'll wake up??" Faith's eyes lit up with hope, but other than that her body language and voice tone showed nothing. She was a pro at hiding emotions.
"No. I mean she'll get better. I don't know if she'll ever wake up. We can only hope for the best, right?"
"Yeah...right. Look, I need to get going. Umm...I'll be here Wednesday, I think."
"Okay, Faith. Take care."
She nodded and got out of the room. She went home as usual and took a long, cold shower to relax her muscles. As she got out of it, she felt suddenly tired and decided to rest for a bit before going out on patrol.
Faith opened the door to Buffy's room and found Angel besides the bed looking down at Buffy. Faith stood there motionless watching him from the doorway as he kissed her lightly and she woke up. Buffy smiled at him and pulled him closer to her, hugging him and whispering words of love and comfort. They hugged and cried with happiness.
Faith walked in the room and expected them to be surprised, but they didn't even notice her.
"Umm...hello.." she said.
They didn't even blink. Faith walked even closer to them and tapped Angel on the shoulder.
He did not turn. She called his name, then Buffy's. They didn't hear her. Finally she started to scream and yell and all they did was smile at each other and kiss.
Finally they both looked at her with anger and disgust. Buffy got out of bed and walked over to Faith.
"I'll never forgive you" she said in a menacing voice.
Then she lightly touched Faith as she slowly turned to insignificant, unexisting dust.
"BUFFY!!" Faith awoke with a start. She was still naked and sweating. She looked around startled and realized it was a dream. She got up and started dressing.
She couldn't take this anymore. She had to talk to Buffy. And she had to wake up. Living with the torture of not knowing whether or not Buffy would ever forgive her was unbearable. She got outside and didn't even notice the rain that fell on her. She ran to the hospital with tears on her eyes and entered it.
She managed to pretend that she was there to work and got to Buffy's floor. She opened the door harshly and walked over to the bed.
"Okay, Buffy. You're going to wake up. You were always so fucking strong, it was annoying as hell. You have to...I can't live like this" she started crying harder and got Buffy's hand. "Please, I just need to apologize. I never wanted to hurt you. I just wanted... I'm a different person now...WAKE UP DAMNIT!"
She shouted as she collapsed to the floor sobbing. She was tired, wet and a complete mess.
Until she heard a moan. And a groan.
She looked up and saw Buffy's hand moving slightly.
"Oh, shit" she got up and looked at Buffy as she opened her eyes groggily.
"Buffy...you're awake" she hugged Buffy and turned her head a little.
Her lips just inches from Buffy's...She couldn't do that. Take advantage of her like that. But she couldn't help it. She didn't even realize that her lips were now touching Buffy's.
All she could think about was the fact that Buffy was awake.
And kissing her back.
The kiss didn't last much. As soon as Faith acknowledged that they were kissing, that Buffy's tongue was inside her mouth and that she was now fully awake she pulled back.
"B...God...I'm..."she couldn't even think straight. She brushed the tears out of her eyes and looked down.
"Where...am I?" Buffy looked around frowning.
"You're in the hospital in LA. They found you in the cemetery and they brought you here. You were beat up pretty bad. Look, Buffy..."
"Buffy? I'm Buffy..."
*Oh, fuck* Faith thought.
"Yes...Don't you remember?"
"I don't know. I'm a little confused. Everything's blurry. Who are you?" she looked deep into Faith's eyes as if trying to see through her.
"I'm Faith. I'm your..umm...friend."
"Right...Faith. God, this is so weird."
"I have to go call someone. I'll be right back, okay?" she was almost shaking.
Buffy nodded and barely smiled. Faith came back a couple of minutes later with Dr. Evans. He looked at Buffy with awe, since she shouldn't be awake so soon. Or awake at all, for that matter.
"Hello..How are you feeling?"
"I'm alright. My head hurts a little..."
"It's perfectly normal. Anything else?"
"Ummm. My memory. It's a little...funky."
He chuckled as he examined her.
"What's the matter with it?"
"I can't seem to remember some things."
"Like your name, address, history?"
"Exactly."
"Well, you see miss, sometimes after a severe head trauma like the one you suffered you can experience temporary amnesia. But, since you didn't spend that much time in a coma and you're recovering incredibly fast I'd say you'll have your full memory back in a couple of months. Nothing to worry about."
"Well, I know my name is Buffy cause..."
"She remembered!" Faith said quickly "Yeah... She just knew her first name. When she was waking up, I asked her and she told me. She was still a bit groggy."
Buffy looked at her and nodded. She didn't know why but she had to trust Faith right now.
"Yeah, that's right."
"Okay, well...I'll have to do some exams and until you remember your whole name and address you'll have to stay in the hospital, okay? You'll be transferred to a different area of the hospital. Faith can take you there in a couple of days."
"Okay. Thanks doctor."
He smiled and left the room.
Buffy looked at Faith again. She was looking down at the floor. She didn't know what to do or to say.
"How come you lied?" Buffy asked.
"Umm...look, Buffy. They can't know that I am your...friend. It's very complicated. And they can't know who you are."
"Why not?"
"You...you...had a terrible fight. With your family. Back in Sunnydale where you came from. And...you ran away. We did. Together. So, you can't tell them who you are."
"But how else will I get out of here? What about my family? They must be so worried."
"Ummm...I already told them. Don't worry." Faith was lying so much to Buffy. She had to keep so many things hidden. So many secrets.
She left Buffy in the room thinking and walked down the hall. What had she just done? Buffy was absolutely right. Her family and friends must be so worried. But...on the other hand. Did she really care about them? All they did was punish her and not believe in her. She figured that it was for the best. Buffy had to stay with her. After all, they were both Slayers. And she always lived alone so now her and Buffy could live alone, together...Before she got crazy with her senseless thoughts she heard the doctor's voice calling her.
"Yeah?" she answered.
"Could you take her medical file to the psychiatric floor? It's extremely important that you do, otherwise they won't know that she's supposed to be going there."
"Okay, sure."
She looked at the file on her hand. She had to deliver this. It contained everything about Buffy's health and the fact that she had amnesia. Other than that she was fine and could just walk away.
She turned back to the direction of Buffy's room and entered it again. Buffy had her eyes closed but she opened them when she heard a noise.
"Hey...Are you okay?" Faith said hesitantly.
"Yeah...I'm good."
"So...you don't remember anything? Not even your age?"
"I'm 25..."
*Oh, *that* she remembers* Faith thought.
"That's all you remember?"
"I guess. Well, you'll have to tell me everything then. From the way you welcomed me when I woke up I take it we're pretty close," she smiled at Faith.
A genuine smile. It had been so long since she last saw that beautiful smile aimed at her.
"What's that?" Buffy asked pointing at the thin sheet of paper in Faith's hand.
"Nothing" she threw it out the window and walked over to Buffy's bed.
This was all she wanted. To be friends with Buffy again. To erase their past.
This was her chance.
*BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP*
Faith reached for the alarm clock and couldn't find the button. So she threw it across the room, breaking it. She was still half asleep and when she opened one eye and looked for it she groaned.
"Oh, no. Not again."
She got up and picked up the completely broken clock off the floor. And its pieces. She sighed and threw it all in the garbage can and wrote "Unbreakable Alarm Clock" in her grocery list. She had already broken about 20 alarm clocks. Well, 21 with that one.
Faith put on a white tank top, black trousers and a boot. She brushed her hair with her fingers, washed her face and then brushed her teeth; completing the routine she did basically every day for the past week. It had been a week since Buffy had woken up and Faith still hadn't told her the truth. How could she? She got her jacket and left for the hospital.
"Thank you. That's better" Buffy said as the nurse adjusted her bed position. She had broken the automatic button available for her last night. Apparently, making the bed go up and down about a 100 times was not a very nice thing to do and would cause breakage. What could she do…She was bored as hell when Faith wasn't there.
"Hey, kid." Faith said as she entered the room.
"Hi…" Buffy gave her a wide grin as the nurse left. She opened her arms and Faith approached the bed and gave Buffy a light kiss on the lips.
"Are you better?" she said gently pushing a hair off the blonde's forehead.
"Uh, huh…much better. You look great today. I like the no make up look."
Faith touched her face and realized she really had left without putting any makeup at all. The only time she remembered doing that was when she was 9 and wasn't allowed to.
"Yeah…I read somewhere that was in again" she chuckled.
"When am I leaving, Faith?"
Faith had told the nurse that she was going to take Buffy to another area of the hospital tonight so she could stay there getting treatment until she got her full memory back when in reality she would take her home. They didn't even know Buffy was supposed to go there since she had thrown out her file.
"The doctor talked to me today. He said you're coming home tonight." Faith said as Buffy smiled happily.
*Fuck, what am I going to do? Welcome to our lovely home, Buffy. It's right here in this crappy hotel. Don't mind the cockroaches…*
Another nurse entered the room and smiled politely at Faith.
"Sponge bath?" Buffy asked.
"Yes…" the nurse looked at Faith expecting her to leave but she just stood there.
"Ummm…Jayne…do you mind if Faith does it?"
Faith looked at Buffy wide-eyed.
"Umm…well, she's doing community service. And a nurse does not necessarily do this so I guess it would be okay for her to do it if she's comfortable with it. Are you?"
Faith nodded.
"Okay, then. The sponge is over there and you have to pick up some water in the bathroom. Buffy knows how it is so she'll guide you. Anything else, call me."
"B! Are you insane?" Faith whispered after the other woman left.
"What? What's the matter? I'd rather you do it than some stranger."
"I know, but…"
"But what? You've never seen me naked before? We never did anything like that?"
"No, we never got that far. Not even close."
"Well, I want to. You're only going to bathe me, Faith. No big deal."
Buffy took off her camisole, pulling it over her head and tossed it aside. Only the white sheet was covering her.
"You wanna do this or not?"
Faith grabbed the sheet and pulled it down revealing Buffy's naked body. Buffy giggled as Faith gasped.
"Guess that means `yeah, B!' Okay, here's what you do. You wet the sponge a little on the water, not too much or you'll wet the bed. Just gently rub it on my skin. You can use a little soap and then rinse it. I can turn to both sides and even get up a little."
"Okay…where do I start?"
"This is the order the nurse follows: neck, shoulders, arms, breasts,stomach, legs and private..umm…areas." she said blushing.
Faith got some water and gently moistened the sponge. She lifted it and brushed it across Buffy's shoulders and arms. She lifted her left arm and gently massaged it as she moved the sponge in circles. She lightly touched her breast, making Buffy hiss and then proceeded to the other arm. She noticed that Buffy had closed her eyes and grinned. She let go of the sponge and wetted her hand. She rubbed it in the soap making it lather.
She touched Buffy's shoulders again and Buffy opened her eyes to see that Faith had discarded the sponge. Faith glided her soapy hand down to Buffy's breast, stroking the soft flesh and she couldn't help but purr.
"You're enjoying this aren't you?"
"You're the one that did this to me…it's a sponge bath, Faith."
"If you want I can use the sponge again…" she said as she concentrated on Buffy's nipples.
Buffy moaned and shook her head closing her eyes again. Faith smirked and proceeded to Buffy's stomach and her navel. She soaped her hand again and started to move her hand in circles soothing her tight muscles that were still a little sore. She stopped just above Buffy's curls and moved down to her foot, making Buffy groan.
"I'm following the right order…"
"You're being evil."
Faith massaged Buffy's toes one by one, then her legs, going up to her thighs. She was starting to pant just like Buffy. She stroked her inner thigh and leaned down to kiss Buffy. She wrapped her arms around the brunette pulling her closer as Faith found her wet center. Buffy moaned louder into Faith's mouth and bucked her hips up.
Faith started to finger her clit and she glided her other hand up to Buffy's breast. Buffy was wet all over but her sex was literally dripping with need. She inserted one digit into Buffy and started to massage her clit with her palm. She pulled back from the kiss breathless and concentrated on her motions.
Soon Buffy was trashing her head on the pillow and whispering the other girl's name as she came. Her breathing was erratic and Faith pulled out of her and proceeded to rinse her off as she came down of her high.
When Buffy opened her lids, she was done. She sighed and stretched her arms above her head.
"That was the best sponge bath ever…" Buffy said giggling.
"Yeah, yeah….You owe me one," Faith said as she leaned down and kissed Buffy again.
"Oh, oh!" Buffy said.
"What?" Faith asked frowning.
"You forgot the back." She said smirking.
Faith pulled back and smiled.
"Here, let me help you."
"Faith, I'm strong enough to walk, you know? Faith! Will you just let go of my arm?"
Faith looked at Buffy annoyed. She sure was stubborn. She wanted to practically run down the hall to the elevator. She was weak, damn it. She still had bruises over her body and it obviously hurt a little to get up and out of bed.
"Fine...Do it your way, then" she let go of Buffy and walked out of the room and down the hall quickly. Her boots making loud, mad noises on the floor. She tossed her hair to the side and walked, her nose high up.
"Hi, Linda. Could you give me Buffy's stuff? We're transferring her to another floor and she wants it to be there."
"Well..There's nothing much. Only this backpack. No documents there. Just some sports clothes and money. Is her file there already?"
"Yeah, thanks… " she got the bag from the other woman and looked back to find Buffy coming. Not exactly *coming*.
She was actually moving ever so slowly. Faith pretended she didn't notice, handed Buffy her bag and continued to walk towards the elevator.
"Ummm...Faith? Hun?" Buffy called softly.
Faith turned slowly and stopped with her hands on her waist.
"Yes?" she said, the word lingering in her tongue.
"Could you help me for a bit?" she gave her a puppy smile.
Faith pretended to be annoyed but she really wanted to help Buffy. She put one of Buffy's arms over her shoulder and together they walked into the elevator.
"Okay, remember how I told you that we have been here for a short time?"
"Yes...We're in a hotel. You told me."
"Ummm...hotel is not quite right. We're in a motel. And not a very good one."
"I don't care...As long as it has a bed and a bathroom I'm fine. Really, Faith. I don't care."
Faith turned back to the window looking outside the cab they were in. There was no way Buffy wouldn't care. She knew her. B cared about those stuff. She liked clean, girly, cute bedrooms. Faith didn't. She didn't care. But then again, she could have changed...The car stopped and she looked back inside.
"Thanks" she handed the driver some money. No tips of course. Faith never tipped anyone.
They walked towards the door of the room. Buffy didn't seemed that freaked out yet. She mainly looked tired or curious. Faith turned the key and opened the door.
"Here we are. Don't mind the decoration...or the underwear thrown around" Faith smiled nervously.
Buffy got in and put her bag in the little chair by the door. She sat on the bed and moved a bit to check how soft it was. Faith fidgeted from foot to foot expecting her to run out of there at any time. The blonde walked over to the TV and turned it on. The image wasn't perfect but the sound was...and she could clearly see what was on.
"Perfect" she said laying back in the bed. It made those terrible horror movie squeaky sounds. She looked up at the ceiling. The paint looked really old. Like, turn of the century old. Okay, maybe it wasn't that perfect.
"So....what do you wanna do?"
"I don't know...I need some clean clothes. Do I have some here?" she looked around for any sign she had been there before. Of course, she found none. Just Faith's stuff were scattered everywhere.
"No..not really. There's nothing of yours here."
"We'll have to buy it, then... Do we have any money? I found some in my bag."
"Yes. We have some."
"Okay, then...We'll go shopping tomorrow."
Buffy got up again and walked over to the bathroom, turning the light on. It was probably the only nice thing about their room. It had a tub, a shower and a sink. It all looked really clean and the room smelled so very much like Faith's skin. Buffy instinctively smiled.
"I think I'll take a bath."
"Okay."
Faith opened the closet and took out a clean towel. She threw it to Buffy and sat down on the bed taking her boots off.
"Wanna join me?"
Faith looked up and smiled. Buffy sure was very much the nympho these days...
She entered the bathroom and stepped out of her pants. Buffy was already entering the tub and turning the water on. Faith seemed to forget the fact that it was the first time they both would be naked together.
"You are so beautiful," Buffy said as she looked at Faith's naked body.
Faith looked down and blushed. Faith fucking *blushed*. When was the last time that happened? She walked over to the tub and sat across Buffy, their legs tangling in the middle. Faith moved a little closer and kissed Buffy lightly.
Soon the intensity of it grew bigger and bigger and Buffy ended up straddling Faith's lap, her legs wrapped around the other brunette's waist. Their breasts were moving against each other, massaging each other in ways that regular hands couldn't possibly do.
Faith started to undulate her hips onto Buffy's. Their clits met and together they rocked towards ecstasy, water splashing everywhere. They moaned and sighed and purred. Pleasure filled their bodies and together they came yelling each other's name.
After their bath, they sat there in the tub for a long time quietly. Faith was leaning back on the tub and Buffy was enveloped in her arms. Faith lazily traced circles around Buffy's nipples.
"Faith..."
"Hum?" Faith was almost close to sleeping there.
"Tell me more about us."
"Us? Like, Buffy and Faith the couple. Okay...Well, at first we got along pretty well. Then things started to get pretty bad. Like, wicked bad actually. We hated each other for a long time."
"What for? Is it because we were both slayers?"
Buffy remembered that little fact all along. She didn't know about Faith being the Chosen One but as soon as she touched the other girl she found a weird connection that only slayers could possibly have.
"You can say that...I had a different way of dealing with my slayer powers. We didn't understand each other very well. But, let's not talk about that anymore...you'll remember it all soon, right? Like the doctor said. Soon you won't need me to tell you stories."
"Right, soon…" Buffy smiled and kissed Faith gently.
Faith could only hope that it would not happen that soon.
"This is weird...I look like mini-you."
Buffy eyed her reflection up and down in the mirror. She was wearing one of Faith's leather pants and a cleavagey red top. She had let her hair air dry naturally and Faith had put lots of make up on her.
"You look wicked hot, B" Faith said while she came back to flipping through one of Buffy's magazines she had found in her bag.
"Umm..Don't you think I look kinda...I don't know...slutty?"
"I wear these clothes, babe."
"Yeah, I know. But they go well with your personality."
Faith dropped the magazine and looked at Buffy annoyed.
"Not that you're a slut!! Or slutty...you are very non-sluttish...I mean...ummm."
"I know what you mean..." she got up and encircled Buffy's waist from behind.
"I'm sorry, Faith. I didn't mean to hurt you..."
Faith whispered an "it's okay" in Buffy's ear and proceeded to kiss her neck and shoulders. Buffy suddenly relaxed and sighed, holding the back of Faith's head urging her closer.
"I do look kinda hot" Faith chuckled at this "This feels amazing...but you keep that up and we'll never go out to eat."
Faith pulled back and nodded.
"You're right..Let me just get dressed and we'll go."
"On second thought" she got Faith's hand and pulled her back smirking "I'm not that hungry.."
Faith looked at her seriously, her eyes dark with lust and pushed her up against the wall. She forcefully kissed her, her tongue raping Buffy's mouth and swallowing her scream of shock and pleasure.
She put her hand on Buffy's leg and slowly moved up, touching lightly with her fingers and she stopped just under her breasts.
"Please...Faith..Touch me."
Faith looked at her and cupped both of her breasts roughly. Buffy hissed with pleasure and bucked her hips to get more friction with Faith's thigh. Faith held her and walked back to the bed falling. Buffy followed, giggling. Buffy straddled the brunette and pulled her top over her head. When her breasts were finally free she leaned down and Faith captured one nipple with her tongue while the blonde worked on opening Faith's shirt. Faith sat up a little and took her shirt off. She wasn't wearing anything else so Buffy felt like she had to get naked too.
But Faith's leather pants were tight on her. And not collaborating.
"Damn...These pants" Buffy started to laugh and Faith helped her take it off.
Faith had to get up in the bed and pull the pants upward...Buffy couldn't stop laughing and with her stomach and body shaking it got even more difficult. Finally the pants came off but Faith lost her balance and fell from the bed. Wich caused more laughter from Buffy.
"Yeah, you're laughing cause it's not your ass that just went numb."
Buffy pouted and walked over to Faith helping her to get up. She pushed the girl to the bed and climbed up her body.
"Let me see if I can make you feel something" she said seductively.
She kissed Faith again and soon she had 3 fingers up her sex, pumping in and out. Buffy was trying desperatly to find some friction in Buffy's thigh a look of concentration in her face. After a few more minutes of this they came and Buffy collapsed on top of Faith. The brunette kissed her sweaty forehead.
"Wow..." Faith said.
"First time we had dry sex" Buffy giggled.
"Huh?"
"You know? Without the whole water scenario. First the sponge bath, then the tub. This was the first time we had sex in a regular bed without getting ourselves wet. Well, not with water anyway" Buffy grinned wickedly.
"Oh yeah..." Faith laughed at Buffy's logic.
Faith got up and started to dress again.
"Damn...You ruined my makeup."
Faith looked back at Buffy and smiled.
"I'm never having sex with you again, Faith."
"Yeah right, Summers...Like you could take it."
When they finally arrived at the restaurant Buffy picked Faith looked around nervously.
"What's the matter?" Buffy said worried.
"Nothing..I'm just not feeling well."
"We'll eat quickly and go home soon, okay? Don't worry" she took Faith's hand in her lovingly.
Faith smiled at Buffy's attitude of worriness. She wasn't used to getting that from girls. Well, from anyone actually.
The thing that Faith couldn't tell Buffy was that she had ironically picked Angel's favorite restaurant, hence the nervous attitude.
Apparently not only Angel's favourite. A few tables behind them sat a very stunned and confused Cordelia.
That night after Faith and Buffy had dinner in the restaurant they headed home as usual. And made love, as usual. Things were starting to get "normal". They were both getting used to the idea of being with each other constantly and Faith didn't act weirded out when they were having sex anymore. It was not a very usual thing to her, having sex with a person you always considered to be your enemy. Buffy of course found everything natural.
They were lying down on the bed and Buffy had fallen asleep. Faith was holding her from behind and tracing the outlines of her body softly. It was raining outside and the lightning was the only thing that illuminated their bodies.
Faith had decided to stop working at the hospital. It was far too dangerous for her to be there since the truth about Buffy and the fact that she wasn't where she was supposed to be could be discovered at any minute. She would figure something else to do tomorrow.
"But, Faith....I want to."
"I know you do. But don't you think it'll be a little hard for you to get a job without any ID or documents. Get real, Buffy." Faith said as she put some clean clothes on.
Buffy pouted sat up on the bed and turned on the TV. Faith sighed and kneeled down in front of her.
"Look...I know you want to get out of this place. I do too. And I'm sure that once we figure out a way to get your ID's and everything you'll get a wonderful job and help me, okay? I just want you to stay put for a while. I don't want to see you hurt." She got up and kissed Buffy lightly on the lips.
"Okay..." Buffy said sighing "I think I'll take a bath now. My hair reeks of cigarette from the restaurant. Unless you find that a turn on..."
Faith chuckled and sat on the bed, deciding to watch some TV herself. She heard a knock on the door and frowned. Who could it possibly be. She got up and opened the door.
"Cordelia" she said as her mind panicked. She tried to look relaxed but she quickly got out and closed the door.
The other woman looked at her seriously. They stood like that in silence until Faith said something.
"Is there something wrong? Does Angel need me?"
"Look...Faith. I don't know what sort of sick game you are playing here but I just cannot sit back and watch Angel get hurt."
"What do you mean?"
"I saw you and Buffy at the restaurant last night..."
Faith felt her jaw clench and her heart beat faster.
"...and I thought I'd warn you that I know. Buffy's missing. At least we all thought she were. Giles and the gang are worried, they have no idea where she went or why. Angel has been desperately looking for her, you know?"
"Look, Cordy.."
"Don't "look, cordy" me. I don't know who you think you are, but to me you were always a self-centered psycho bitch."
She took a step closer to Faith. Faith said nothing. She was fighting the urge to slap or pound on the tall brunette but that would only make things worse. She just listened to the other girl's harsh words. She was taking it all.
"Angel may like you, God knows why, and he helped you. And what do you do? You betray him. I guess some people really never change, Faith. You should still be behind bars. Or better yet, in a cage."
"Don't talk to me like that? How do you think *I* feel, huh? Do you think I like lying to Buffy just so I can get a small fraction of friendship? Just so I can get a person to like and worry about me?"
"Then end this misery Faith. Tell her. And tell Angel."
"I'll tell Angel...I really am going to"
"You better. Because if you don't tell him in a week, I'll make sure he finds out."
She turned away and left. Faith sighed and entered the room again. Buffy was getting out of the bathroom with a towel around her body.
"Let's go shopping?" Buffy said smiling.
"Do you like this one?" Buffy said as she lifted up a navy blue shirt.
"Yeah...It's okay."
"What's wrong? You've been weird today."
"Nothing...it's nothing."
"I think I'll try it on."
Faith followed Buffy and she entered one of the little booths to change. The brunette sat in a chair nearby and looked down worriedly.
"Faith, could you help me for a bit?"
Faith sighed and got up. She opened the little door and Buffy pulled her in quickly.
"What the fu..." she was silenced with a kiss.
Buffy wrapped her arms around her neck and pushed her up against the wall. She pulled back and a breathless Faith smiled at her.
"What was that for?"
"A cheer up kiss. Did it work?"
Faith looked up frowning.
"Why dont you try some more?" Faith grinned wickedly.
Faith kissed her again and Buffy opened the button to the other girl's pants. She pushed them down and kissed her way down Faith's body stoping to suckle her breasts through the shirt, Faith hissed and held Buffy's head in place.
"God, Buffy..."
Buffy kissed further down and stopped just above her panties. She pushed them down and placed a small kiss above her curls. Faith closed her eyes in anticipation and felt Buffy's soft tongue opening her slits. She opened her legs a little and put one above Buffy's shoulder giving her better access.
The blonde slayer nipped and licked eagerly and thrust two digits in Faith's passage. The other girl muffled a loud moan and bit her wrist so she wouldn't cry out in pleasure. Buffy increased her tempo and added another finger. She applied extra pressure to her clit and rotated her tongue, one, two, three times until she felt Faith's walls clamping down on her fingers and her whole body shook with release. She kissed her way up Faith's body and kissed her fully on the lips. She pulled back and smiled seductevely.
"Was that better?"
Faith was speechless and Buffy started giggling.
"I love you." Buffy said innocently
Faith looked at her wide-eyed. She never expected Buffy to love her.
"I...I love you too."
Buffy stopped giggling and looked deeply in her eyes.
"You know what the worse part of amnesia is for me? Not remembering our past. You're the most caring, giving person, Faith...and I wish I could know more than that."
Faith nodded and they got out. Buffy walked to the line handing Faith a bunch of clothes. She sure was a shopaholic. And her money would probably vanish as soon as they reached the end of the line.
Faith had decided to tell Buffy everything when they got back home. She was rehearsing what she would say in her mind earlier, that's why she was acting weird.
"Thank you," Buffy said politely to the girl
They walked back home and Faith decided to stop by the grocery store and buy some junk food. Buffy of course, was more than eager to get them but she was tired so she decided to go home by herself and Faith would go after she got the food.
Buffy entered the room and after cleaning and fixing her part of the closet, she heard a knock in the door. She walked over to it and opened the door.
"Hi. Are you looking for Faith? She'll be back in a few...Hey, are you all right? You look like you're about to pass out."
Angel stood on the doorway, speechless.
"Do you want to wait for Faith inside?" Buffy said eyeing the man up and down. What was he doing staring at her and standing there like a freak? His face looked familiar but she couldn't quite remember him. She motioned for him to come in and before she knew it he was hugging her tight.
"Get off of me!" she said as she tried to push him away.
"Buffy!! Oh, God! I thought you were dead!" he pulled back and looked at her confused expression. He let go of her and she fixed herself. Her head started to hurt a little.
"Do I know you?" she looked back up at him and put her hand on her waist.
Angel looked at her frowning. What the hell was going on? Why was she here at Faith's? Why didn't she remember him?
"Buffy, it's me Angel"
She looked up thoughtfully but didn't remember anything about him much. What if he was a demon? Or a psycho? She started to get a little freaked out and tried to make him go away.
"Right, Angel. Look, Angel...Faith will be back soon. I'll tell her you stopped by. Can you please leave now?"
"Buffy what's wrong? Did Faith hurt you?"
Suddenly she felt dizzy and about to pass out. Angel hurried and picked her up before she fell down. That last sentence did something to Buffy. Faith, hurting her? She loved her.
Faith. Hurt. Suddenly images flashed through her eyes as if her brain was getting some of its files back.
Then, she remembered.
How Faith had treated her, tried to kill Angel, slept with Riley, hurt her mother and friends. How Buffy had put her in a coma and argued with her before she went to jail. She closed her eyes shut and shook her head. She couldn't believe that had actually happened. Nightmares that were actually her reality. Her life and past with Faith.
"Nonononononononono... This is not true...Oh, God...please don't..."
She started to cry hysterically and Angel held her, which only made her feel worse. She didn't want him to hold her. She didn't love him anymore. The only person she loved was in fact a jerk.
But was she? Faith was so different now. Maybe because she had met her all over again it was like Faith was this entirely different person. The relationship they had was something so honest and deep it couldn't be faked.
"It's okay, Buffy. I'm here for you"
Buffy looked at Angel. She had to get out of there. Faith would be home soon and she wasn't ready to face the woman that lied to her and the man she used to love at the same time.
"I...I...have to leave. I have to be away"
"What happened Buffy? Why didn't you remember me?"
"I came here and was attacked by a group of vampires and I...I ended up in the hospital. I lost part of my memory and..." she was a little weak and each word echoed in her mind along with the hurt she was feeling inside her brain.
"...She didn't tell you anything?"
Angel got up and sighed angrily.
"She didn't do it to hurt me, Angel...I'm sure of it"
"I can't believe she would do that. Lie to you like that, when you're obviously weak and helpless."
"I'm not weak and helpless Angel. I know how to handle myself."
She got up and felt dizzy again. Angel held her again and sat her down on the bed.
"I can see that..."
She looked up at him annoyed and heard the lock opening. She looked back and saw Faith entering the room, humming a song happily. She saw Angel and Buffy together and dropped her bags.
"Oh, God" she said backing up.
Buffy got up, tears already forming again in her eyes and she walked over to Faith slowly.
"You lied to me" she said bitterly.
"Buffy.... I...I...was going to tell you."
"Oh, yeah. I'm sure you would" Angel said sarcastically.
"I really was, Angel. I would never hurt Buffy," she said seriously. She looked back at Buffy lovingly and the blonde cried harder looking down.
"How could you do that to me, Faith? I trusted you so much…" Buffy passed her hand through her hair and sighed, "I feel like I don't know you."
Angel was a bit confused but he knew that this wasn't the best thing for Buffy right now. She was probably confused and she had to go back home. For him, Buffy and Faith would never get along.
But for Faith and Buffy, Angel didn't even exist.
They stood in front of each other for minutes. Not a word was spoken. Buffy's soft crying was the only thing that made a sound.
"Let's go, Buffy. You don't need this."
Angel walked over to Buffy and got her hand pulling her lightly toward the door. She walked numbly not looking at Faith.
"No...Please, Buffy. Don't leave me. We have to talk…" she pleaded. She started to cry too as Angel opened the door.
Buffy looked at Faith and the brunette mouthed an "I love you". Buffy lifted her hand weakly as a goodbye and left.
The last sound heard was the door shutting down harshly.
And Faith collapsing to the floor, sobbing.
Angel sat on his desk, anxiously waiting for Buffy to come out of his bedroom so they could talk. She had come in the way to his place in a complete silence, her face pale and scared looking down at the floor of the car. She cried silently until the tears just drained.
He had absolutely no clue what was going on...why they had acted that way with each other and why Buffy was so sad to leave Faith. She opened the door wearing one of Angel's large shirts and a pair of shorts. She had taken a shower, hoping it would wash away all the worries.
But pain is not washable. Neither is love.
Angel got up and smiled politely at her. She just stared at him numbly and sat down across him. Her head still hurt and she flinched in pain when she heard a loud noise coming from the street.
"Are you okay? Maybe you should go to a doctor to see your head. How long has it been since you hit it?"
"It's been a month, I guess" She hadn't realized it had been that long. A month of not knowing the truth. A month with Faith. "A month" she repeated
"What happened, Buffy? Why did you stay with Faith?"
He had linked Faith to the hospital since he remembered she worked there, but he still saw no reason why Buffy would live with her. The blonde sighed. For a person with over 200 years of age he was pretty damn stupid not to notice what was going on.
"I...She...She was the only person I had at the time. I woke up and she was there, Angel. I was alone and confused and she took care of me. In every way.” She got up and passed her hand through her hair ”She...told me all these things about how we were...close. And in a way, it did happen... We got really close."
Angel looked at her waiting for her to continue the story when it hit him. He made an "oh" shape with his mouth while Buffy looked down sadly.
"I...I guess I still love her, Angel"
Faith walked out of the hospital, relieved in a way. She had finally quit her job. Now, she had to work somewhere else otherwise she'd be back in a "cage" like Cordy had said.
Maybe that's what she deserved.
After all, she had lied to Buffy. How did she expect to win her trust by lying to her? Faith walked back to her motel room thinking everything through. She opened the door and walked over to the closet, opening it.
She took one of Buffy's favorite dresses and held it. She started to cry again. Faith had never cried so much in her entire life. Not even when her dad left her when she was really young, or when her mum kicked her out of the house or when she was in jail going through everything alone.
Those things were nothing compared to the pain she was experiencing. She had tried to call Angel, but Cordy would tell her Angel wasn't ready to talk to her yet. She knew she deserved it. She’d probably never hear from Buffy again. She was back in ground zero.
So, Faith had made a decision. She was leaving LA. Didn't know where to go, but she didn't care either. And the fact that she wasn't allowed to also didn't matter. Buffy had treated her so bad; it was impossible for them to be together again. But one thing she couldn’t deny.
She still loved her.
"What do you mean, ‘still love her’? Since when do you *love her*?"
“What?? Who do you think you are to yell at me?” She couldn’t believe Angel was mad at her. He was pretty damn furious.
“I think I have the right to know about you. We were all so worried and what do you do? You take the free time to fall in love with… Faith???”
“First of all, what '*right* to know' do you have? We’re not together anymore. Haven’t been for almost 6 years. I’m a different person, Angel. I’m not your Buffy anymore.”
He looked at her hurt and she sighed.
“I still love you, I do. But it’s a different type of love. You can’t choose the one you love. You, more than anyone, should know that. Second, I lost my memory. I didn’t know you were worried. Hell, I didn’t know you even existed.”
“That doesn’t make up for the fact you got together with her.”
“God, Angel. Hear yourself. 'Make up for the fact…' What did I do wrong?? I am alone, I’m 25 years old I am capable of thinking for myself and with the circumstances I couldn’t help but love her.”
He started pacing and hit a wall nearby, cracking it a bit. Buffy groaned from the noise and he mumbled a “sorry” under his breath.
“I just can’t believe you’re saying this…Faith doesn’t deserve it.”
“Why doesn’t she? Just because she lied? God, I changed so much, maybe she did too. She was capable of lying just to get my trust again. To start over…” Buffy heard her words and looked down “She just wanted another chance.”
She said those last words to herself, quietly. Suddenly everything made sense. The way Faith had acted. She just wanted a fresh start, a different story. And Faith was willing to live with the knowledge of the hurt she had caused to Buffy only to herself. All the pain and suffering all in her. She had to talk to her. They had to work this out.
“Angel…” Cordy opened the door to his room. “Sorry to interrupt but Faith just called. I think I should tell you…She’s leaving LA.”
“What?” Buffy looked at her scared. “She can’t….I have to talk to her.”
Buffy started to walk away but Angel took hold of her arm. She looked back at him.
“No…you’re not leaving yet.”
“Angel…. What do you want for me?”
“I want you to be happy.”
She looked at him seriously then smiled lightly.
“So, let me go.”
He looked at her again and saw all the hope in her eyes. He couldn’t keep her from being happy. So he let go.
And she left
“Last call for bus 211, destination…” Faith heard the annoying voice coming from the speakers and got up walking to her bus. She would leave this place, and never come back.
“FAITH!!!”
She heard Buffy screaming for her and couldn’t believe this was happening. She was probably hallucinating…Now besides a creep she would be crazy. Great. She turned around slowly and saw it really was Buffy. She was running towards her. Faith stared at her wide-eyed, as she got closer. She stopped a few feet from her.
“B! What the hell are you doing here?” She didn’t mean to sound bitchy, she was just surprised.
“I…I was talking with Angel. And as I was speaking I remembered something.”
“What? Look, Buffy I’m so sor…” She was so relieved Buffy didn’t sound mad anymore.
“Shut up, Faith! Just hear this… I remembered the reason I came to LA in the first place. It was you,” she smiled, tears forming in her eyes again. “I wanted to make amends with you, to give you peace. I wanted another chance, just like you did.”
Faith’s eyes filled with hope and she grinned like an idiot.
“Me?? You came here for me?”
Buffy got closer to her and smiled lovingly, brushing away her tears.
“It’s always been you, Faith.”
Then she wrapped her arms around her neck and pulled her towards her kissing her lightly but with passion. Faith smiled and cried through the kiss. She couldn’t believe this was really happening. They pulled back just a bit, still holding each other.
“I love you, B…”
“I love you too Faith.”
And they kissed again. People at the bus station around them stared in awe. Some in disgust. But they didn’t even notice.
They were together now.
The rest of the world didn’t matter.
...continued in Hard Work...