Amends All Around
by Rochelle
Rating: R

Disclaimer: Yep I don't own these characters, Joss Wheadon does. You know he should pay us fic writers to write scripts for him...of course they wouldn't be allowed to air till late at nite ;)
Feedback: It'd be nice :) no wait, it'd be kick ass :o)

I squint turning my head away from the sunlight that's streaming straight into my eyes. My efforts don't get me very far though. Faith's got her arm wrapped tightly around me and is still asleep. She kissed me last night to let me know it was okay. After that she said she was tired and needed to lie down. God she looked so vulnerable and innocent when she asked me to stay last night. She said she didn't want to be on her own and that we'd talk about things in the morning. So I layed down besides her and she snuggled up to me before falling asleep. I watched her for about an hour before I drifted off into my own world of sleep. I look at her again and chuckle lightly as I noticed two deep brown eyes have fixed themselves on me.

"Hey sleepy, good sleep?"

She grunted an answer at me which I assume was her saying ok and then moves away to sit on her edge of the bed. This talking thing? I don't think she likes it too much.

"I don't know if you feel up to it yet, but we said we'd talk about things in the morning."

"You hurt me B, that's all I know and that's about all I have to say right now...that and I still love you and I want you. I can't see my life without you and it scares me. I'm scared that I could easily lose you to him, that you'd go back to him especially after all you know about me now."

I can't see what she's thinking and I'm not going to continue this talk with her back to me, I've got nothing to hide and I don't want her hiding from me anymore. I get up slowly and she tenses, I think she feels I'm leaving, but I'm not. I walk round to her side of the bed and kneel infront of her, taking her hands in mine.

"I know I hurt you Faith and if I could do anything, anything in the world to take it back then I would do. I never wanted to hurt you, but you've got to understand. Angel kissed me..."

She tenses again at the mention of Angel and the kiss, god I wish I could take her pain away. It hurts me even more knowing I helped cause her pain, I did this.

"...I didn't kiss him. I didn't even respond or kiss him back, I pulled away from him."

*****

"...I didn't kiss him. I didn't even respond or kiss him back, I pulled away from him."

God it hurts so fucking much her talking about that undead son of a bitch. I know B's hurting, I know she's hurting cus of how I feel but I can't help her, I want to so badly, but I can't.

"Faith look at me."

I didn't realise it but I turned my glance away from her. It always surprises me how much can be conveyed in someone's eyes. I turn my head towards her and it's like I can read an open book. In her eyes, there's so much light, so much hope, and love. I could get lost in those eyes and I have before, it's like they speak to something deep within me and I respond without thinking, I show love back. But after a few years, it gets easier to control. I can stop that, I can hide my emotions and close myself off from the world.

"I'm not going back to him Faith. I don't love him anymore. Whatever me and Angel had was a long time ago, it's long been dead."

I can't help but smile slightly, she makes puns without thinking about it. She smiles back, slowly realising what she's said.

"I love you Faith and you're not going to lose me because I won't allow it. I don't care what you've done or what's happened, it's all in the past. I love you Faith."

Those three words and I crumble. Faith the tough slayer can fight demons, vampires, anything evil can throw at her but put Buffy Summers infront of her and she can't fight love. I can't help it, I know I love her, more than anything. I swallow the lump in my throat and speak before I can allow myself to cry. Throwing a half hopeful smile at her, I can't help but ask.

"So, does this mean, I mean are we, are things ok between us again?"

"If you'll let them be."

"I want them to be, I love you Buffy."

*****

Things may not be perfect but this is as close as we can get right now. She wants things to be okay and I think she's starting to realise I love her, that I don't want anyone else but her.

"I've just got one question though Faith."

"Yeah?"

She looks nervous as hell and I'm hoping this'll change that nervousness to happiness.

"Go out with me? Be my girlfriend?"

"I'll get back to you about it B, ya know it's a big decision and I can't rush it."

Well at least I know she loves me. She's grinning at me again and tilts my chin upwards to look at her.

"I'm kidding B. Of course I will, this mean you'll shout me something to eat? 'Cus ya know I'm wicked hungry."

"You pain the ass!"

I grin back at her.

"You had me worried."

"Sorry B, couldn't help it and then I couldn't not say yes when you looked so disappointed."

I shake my head, laughing lightly.

"Come on you. Get dressed and come round mine, I'll cook us both lunch and then we can hit the bronze tonight if you want or have a quiet night in."

"God B, we've only just started going out and already you're ordering me about."

I chuck her top at her, laughing again.

"You got five minutes, then I'm leaving for food without you."

*****

Funny how things change isn't it? Yesterday I was ready to end it all and now? Now I'm walking hand in hand with Buffy on the way back to her house for something to eat. Maybe I should've given her a chance to explain, would've saved me a hell've alot of pain but the arms healing slowly. B made me promise to let her take a look at it after we get some lunch.

"B?'

"Yeah?"

"Erm no offence, but do you actually know how to cook now? Cus the last time it went wrong as I remember."

"Oh. Well, I'm sure I can make something, you'll just have to help me out a little."

"You want me to cook?"

"Well you know, I thought you would. Do it for me Faith? 'Cus you know I love you don't you."

Okay that is just unfair. Pulling the 'I love you' card in the middle of argument. She knows I'm gonna cave, that's just so unfair to do.

"Yeah fine, okay then. Can't we just eat some junk food? Ya know I'm wicked hungry and I promise to eat something healthy later."

Two can play at her game. I lean down and kiss her gently before pouting and giving her my best puppy dog eyes. I grin widely as she sighs.

"Yeah ok."

Wicked cool. See, this is what I don't get. One minute I feel my world's gonna collaspe from beneath me and then being with B? It makes me feel like I'm right back on top of my world.

...continued in Fun and Games...