Giving Up
by Samantha
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these guys. They are owned by FOX or whoever. Um the lyrics are by Holly McNarland. This takes place at the end of season 3 and is rated PG, i hardly ever post anything, so feedback is more than welcome. Hope you enjoy.
Faith sat on her bed listening to the CD that Buffy had bought her for Christmas. The apartment was dark except for a few candles. The mayor had just left after congratulating her on a job well done his good little girl he said. She let the pain and fear rush over her, with her façade down the song made so much more sense.
Chase destruction of your own Emotions, and your need for Love makes you easy prey
She knew she loved Buffy, but Buffy loved everyone else. It was just easier this way, better to not have her at all than to have her a little. The mayor loved her that was all that mattered. He took care of her. Better to hate Buffy than love her it was time to forget.
You can't see if I'm not listening You can't hear with my eyes open I can't hate with my eyes open
That was what she needed, just to shut her eyes, shut it all out. Shut out Buffy shut out her feelings, use the hate the mayor had given her. It was so hard though with every spiteful punch at Buffy and every smart bitchy comment she felt like a part of her broke, and little by little she was falling apart.
Chase destruction of your Own existence Keep it clean Clean enough to stand Lick your own wounds Anxious for the next one Cry for more pain Heal what you have
Mostly though she had done it. Gotten the weakness in her to hide, hidden it behind her uncaring mask. But it was making her crazy. Falling, falling, deeper she dug into something that wasn't there. Shooting Angel had been the last straw for her, the last thing she could stand. The last pain she could cause.
Just another hit for the one you love If you cared at all you'd put me down Wake up dead man can't you see I'm starving
It was over now. Buffy was coming she could feel her. She had known she would come. She was coming to kill, she knew that. That was the thing about Buffy, she would kill for her friends. For her friends, not for Faith. For the people she loved. Not Faith. But it was okay, it was time. Time for the end of this craziness inside her head. Silence and rest. Now all she had to do was wait.
I'll feel better when I'm gone