True Love: Agony and Ecstasy
by Slayer125
Rating: NC-17

Disclaimer: These lovely characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. They rock and so does he..
Spoilers: Dawnie's here and Faith was bad but now she's gonna try the bein' good thing.
Feedback: Please...

Buffy rushed through the graveyard wondering how Faith was doing. She could not believe how alive she felt just knowing Faith was awake. Buffy smiled as she remembered the night they had first met outside the Bronze. Her heart stopped the first time she heard Faith's sexy voice say B.

"Whoa Buffy back up....Did I just her voice was sexy..Ugh.. what am I doing. Going crazy sound appropriate." Buffy mumbled to herself. Just then Buffy's senses kicked in and she heard a voice say. "Hey we can't have a crazy slayer on our hands. We already had one of those. That other slayer was something else." The vampire growled. Buffy leaped at him over the tombstone and punched him in the face.

"You don't know anything about that other slayer. She is not crazy you freak. She is a better person than well ever be." As Buffy said this she kept punching him in the face over and over. Every punch that she threw at the vampire was actually directed at her self. The vampire was expressing thoughts she herself used to think. Buffy was getting tired so she staked the vampire and stood up as he turned to dust. She headed towards the hospital and was filled with such turmoil she could not understand.

When Buffy walked into the hospital room she saw Faith sleeping. She looked far from peaceful but at least a little less troubled in her sleep. Buffy smiled at the sight of her. She looked so cute. "BUFFY!!!STOP IT SHE IS NOT CUTE.." Ok voice she is nice looking. Buffy just shook her head. She did not understand all these thoughts. She knew she wanted to help Faith but she did not know what these feelings were. Yes she did want to be Faith's friend but what else.

"I am not going there" Buffy said to herself. She sat down beside Faith's bed and stroke the hair off of Faith's forehead. Buffy sat back and pulled the cell phone out of her pocket. She dialed the only person who understood her thought process.

"Hello" Angel said.

"Hi, it's Buffy. How are you doing?" Buffy asked glad to hear his voice.

"I'm okay how are you doing? And before you say anything I already got a call from Willow."

Buffy sighed. She loved her friends but they felt she was not capable of taking care of herself when she had save the world all the time.

"Angel, I know she hurt you but I can't walk away. I owe her too much. It is my fault she went all psycho on us. She just wanted a friend. I will never forget the night I stabbed her. The look in her eyes. She was so miserable all she wanted was a release. She wanted release from the pain. The pain I caused her." Buffy felt tears roll down her face. "She wanted me as a friend and I thought I was too good but she could have been me. If I don't help her then I don't deserve to be a slayer. She is good and I want to show her that that is a good thing. Please don't hate me me." Buffy cried her voice cracking.

"Buffy," Angel said "I understand, do you want me to come help." Buffy felt her heart jump at the thought. But I guess that would not be fair to him Buffy thought. "No if I need your help I will let you know."

Angel sighed and said "Okay, Buffy I love you."

Buffy said "I love you too Angel. Bye."

Faith had heard Buffy walk in. She felt her skin tingle from that brief contact with Buffy's skin. Faith had thought of very little else but Buffy that day. She pretended to sleep but as she heard Buffy's confession to whoever was on the phone she felt the tears slip from her closed eyes. When she heard I love you too Angel she rolled over and was crying as quietly as possible.

Buffy saw Faith roll over as she got off the phone. She tried to remain quiet as she did not want to wake Faith. Buffy leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. She heard something and opened her eyes, that was when she noticed her Faith's shoulders were shaking. Buffy immediately went to the other side of the bed and put her hand on Faith's shoulder. "Hey, what's goin on here." Buffy asked. Faith looked up into the most beautiful hazel eyes she had ever seen and felt her heart crack in yet another place.

Buffy winced when she saw the pain in Faith's eyes. No one should be this sad Buffy thought. I will not let her be this sad ever again. Buffy sat down beside Faith and pulled her up so she could settle in right behind her. Faith tried to resist as Buffy pulled her back against her chest. Faith thought "God this is where I have wanted to be all my life pressed against legendary Buffy Summers." Then Faith realized this was just a comfort thing not because Buffy wanted her or nothin. Faith thought "if I could walk I'd be fuckin walkin outta here. Yeah Faith thought you can't run like a chicken shit. Time to pay the price. Learn to Fuckin deal."

Buffy had felt Faith stiffen and pulled her closer. "What's going on in that head of yours Faith?" Buffy asked.

"Nothing" Faith said.

"You're not acting like nothing's wrong Faith" Buffy said. "I really want to help but I can't if I don't know what is going on."

Faith knew she was going to regret what came out of her mouth next but she could not help it. "Gee Buffy I can't fucking walk but hey that okay. Lets not get worked up about this. No fucking big deal right B. And the only reason you are here is not because you care about me but is that you feel guilty. Buffy Summers can not live with the fucking guilt. Who gives a shit B. I am Faith the Eternal Fuck up. If you want somethin screwed up you can call me."

There were tears rolling down her face as she said "Hell I was supposed to die and get away from this shit and instead I can't even walk away." Faith shifted to look at Buffy and they both had tears running down their faces.

"I'm tired of cryin and hurtin and hurting you and of trying so hard to please you. It's never good enough B. Not for what I need." Faith leaned forward and rested her face in her hands as she cried.

"Faith, you are so much better than you give yourself credit for."

"Then why ain't it good enough. Why isn't it fucking enough for you."

Buffy was looking confused.

"B" Faith started to say something and then she said "Fuck it." Faith shifted so she was facing Buffy and leaned forward. Before Buffy knew what was happening Faith leaned forward and pressed her lips to Buffy's. As soon as Faith's lips touched Buffy's she felt herself responding to the kiss. Her lips opened granting Faith more access. Their tongues met and Buffy felt Faith pull Buffy closer until there was nothing between them. It brought Faith directly between Buffy's legs and Buffy groaned at the contact. Without realizing it Buffy started rubbing against Faith's hip trying to ease the pressure that had built within her that was becoming almost painful. Faith could barely breathe. Not from kissing Buffy but from the sheer pleasure of having Buffy rub against her. Thanking god that at least she could feel that. If Faith went to hell for all the things she had done, she had heaven this very second holding Buffy in her arms. Faith pressed herself even harder against Buffy's very wet center. Buffy squeezed her eyes shut. This pleasure was too much for her. She knew this was wrong in her mind but in her body it had never felt so right.

Faith pulled away from Buffy's kiss only to move her mouth to Buffy's neck. She flicked her tongue against the pulse point on Buffy's neck. Buffy felt tears in her eyes. Faith's hand moved down to cup Buffy's breast and the other hand moved in between her and Buffy's body. Buffy felt Faith's hand moving along her body leaving a trail of fire behind it. Buffy gasped as Faith's hand moved to where her hip had once been. Faith pushed her hand up as hard against Buffy as she could. Faith could feel the moisture under her hand and knew Buffy was very ready but Faith did not want to scare her. She pushed her lips against Buffy's once again and went to unbutton Buffy's jeans. She was having trouble so she pushed Buffy back on the bed and quickly unbuttoned and unzipped Buffy's jeans. She quickly put her hand on Buffy's wet center. Buffy was thrusting against her hand. Faith run her lips down Buffy's neck. She pushed Buffy's shirt up and ran her tongue along Buffy's nipple and smiled at how it begged for her attention. "MMMMM" Buffy moaned and thrust herself against Faith's hand yet again, cursing the panties from preventing Faith's hand from her. She knew this was so fucking wrong but her body would not stop responding and she wasn't sure she wanted to. Faith felt Buffy's muscles ripple as she ran her tongue over her stomach. She balanced herself on her elbows and went to pull Buffy's pants down briefly hoping that no nurses walked in on them. With that thought aside she pulled Buffy's pants and panties down and almost just as fast put her hand on Buffy's very warm, very moist flesh.

"Fuck Faith" Buffy groaned as she felt Faith's hand on her. The direct contact almost sending her over the edge. "That's the plan B" Faith said feeling the pressure inside herself making itself very known. She looked up at Buffy as her tongue traveled down her stomach to her patch up curls where her hand was at. Faith moved her hand and placed her mouth on Buffy. Faith felt Buffy's body writhering underneath her mouth. "Please Faith" Buffy was whimpering and Faith flicked Buffy's clit with her tongue. Buffy surged upward seeking more pleasure. Faith stuck her mouth over Buffy and began running her tongue all over Buffy.

"Fai...ple.. mm. fa..commmm.. ba..." Faith felt Buffy's muscles clenching around her tongue and chose that moment to plunge two of her fingers inside Buffy. There was no gentleness here not because Faith did not want that for the love of her life but because Buffy would not allow it. She was sweaty and groaning. She wrapped her legs around Faith's hand clinging to it for dear life. Buffy's sudden movement caused Faith to lose her balance but she quickly recovered.

She tried to pull on her hand to give her more room to thrust her fingers into Buffy but Buffy was not going to release her hand. Faith shrugged and gently inserted a third finger into Buffy causing her to jump. Buffy felt the passion building inside her and started thrusting against Faith's hand. Faith and Buffy met each other stroke for stroke. Buffy jerked her leg in reaction to Faith's fingers and in doing that her leg pushed up into Faith causing the girl to almost collapse with the pleasure it brought to her. Faith thanked god she still had feeling there she did not know how or care she just knew she did. Buffy smiled when she heard Faith groan and automatically brought her leg back up against Faith only then realizing because of the hospital gown Faith did not have any panties on. So as Faith surged into Buffy, Buffy surged her leg into Faith. Not even realizing she was doing it she brought her hand up to Faith's moist center and plunged three fingers into her. Faith groaned and said "Fuck B."

"Did I...I...Hu..hu..rt..y..o..oh god...fai.." Faith was pushing her fingers hard and fast into Buffy. She did the same to Faith. They felt the release and Faith threw herself behind her hand, which caused her fingers to surge even further into Buffy which set off a chain reaction. Buffy's fingers surged into Faith as they both moved against each other. Skin to skin, mouth to mouth, body to body, they surged at the same exact moment, pressing further into each other. Faith felt Buffy's muscles contract as well as her own. She heard Buffy's moans and cries along with her own. She felt Buffy's climax as well as her own. She looked in Buffy's eyes and saw her soul as well as her own. Faith surged against Buffy losing sense of everything else. Just her and B. Her heart and soul..

"B...fu...B ..ca..you ..look...at me..pl..pl pl.ease.."

Buffy opened her eyes. She had never had this happen before it scared her it felt so good but hurt so bad... "Fai. I ..I..ca..eye..." Buffy felt Faith's muscles clench and Faith was shaking above her.. "mmmmm..B.." All of a sudden Faith became rigid and Buffy felt her hand become very wet and just as she started to say "Ewwww" Faith started thrusting her own fingers again. Buffy felt her own muscles contract and then she felt herself become rigid, but her fingers were still moving in Faith which caused the other girl to go over the edge again. They climaxed together their voices blending together as they said I love you. Neither heard the other as the blood surged through their bodies. They both looked into each others eyes as they climaxed together.

Faith collapsed on top of Buffy immediately trying to roll off of her to avoid hurting her. She felt Buffy pull her up against her. Faith started to say something but Buffy said "no. lets just lay here."

Buffy's body ached in places she had never felt before. Sure her and Angel had made love once but this was "Wooow!" Buffy thought.

"That good hunh?" Faith said.

"Did I say that out loud?"

"Yeah. Sokay it is good for my ego."

Buffy stroked Faith's hair. So many things were going through her mind. Should this have happened. What did she feel for Faith? What could come of this? This is kinda like Angel I have never been so happy and confused at the same time.

Just as she started to shift her weight so she could pull her pants back up she heard the door open. Her and Faith both looked up to see Willow standing at the door with her mouth hanging open. Just as Faith was about to say something to further the girls embarassment, Buffy pushed Faith off of her. Faith, not expecting that tried to catch herself from falling off the bed but failing miserably. She landed with a thud thinking my butt is gonna be sore as much as I land on my ass.

"Wills" Buffy said. "It's not what.."

"It looks like." Willow said. "I think what it is would be obvious Buffy. Your pants are still undone by the way." With that Willow turned to walk away.

"Wills" Buffy said but by then she was gone. "Fuck,Fuck, Fuck, Faith?" She looked around for Faith but did not see her.

"We already did that B." Faith said from the floor. Buffy came around the corner and said "not even fucking funny Faith."

Faith knew heaven was over when she saw the pain in Buffy's eyes.

...continued in Decisions...