Even Angels Fall
by tainted_blood_chylde
Rating: PG
Faith woke with a jolt, she was chained down, it was dark. Something felt wrong.. this wasn't right. Okay.. what was the last thing she remembered? Okay.. there was the incident with Wood, a few brief moments with Buffy.. They nearly kissed.. she remembered that much. Then... yes! Spike.. there was a fight.. and the Bringers. They fed her something. She spat, a sick metallic layer covered the back of her dry throat. It was only a few moments later she realised it was blood. Blood?
She slowly looked down at her hands, she could feel them, but in a way she couldn't. She panicked and moved her hand to her stomach, it was gone! The baby was gone! She pulled on the chains, what was going on? It wasn't until a few moments later Faith realised that she felt completely different herself.. she looked down at her own palms. Gingerly she checked her wrist and stifled a scream... she was a... she was.. NO! it couldn't be.. tugging on the chains on her wrists she pulled away from the wall. It wouldn't break, she'd lost most of her former strength.
Slumping against the wall she sank downwards, she looked beside her. A cup of cold blood. It couldn't be true.. she looked up at the ceiling, she was a vampire.
"You can't be serious!" Kennedy said angrily.
"I am serious! We are keeping her around!" Buffy snapped.
"Shut up! You don't get to do that! You don't get to make the decisions for all of us! I'M A SLAYER TOO NOW! I should have SOME say in what's going on!" Kennedy snapped as she paced back and forth.
"So what? You wanna lead the troops now? Take control? You wanna be responsible for taking them all to their deaths?" Buffy said nastily.
The argument had been raging ever since they discovered Kennedy was the newly activated slayer. Debates were still raging about whether or not to keep Vamp-Faith around. Giles said it could help gain some insight but Xander thought it was crazy, still, somehow the battle had ended up with a full scale argument between the two slayers. Buffy wished so much she could just reach out and snap the girl's neck. She SOOOOOOOO didn't understand.
"Isn't that what you're doing?" she accused the older girl. "All I know is what I have to. Faith's a Killer, a HUMAN killer. Now she's a vampire.. that doesn't exactly spell out hugs and kisses."
"No one is touching her" Buffy spat.
Kennedy crossed her arms and stood staring at the other girl angrily. Stalemate, Buffy knew the argument wasn't over, but she knew she'd won the battle for now. She stormed out of the room and headed for the basement, Kennedy kissed Willow and stormed out the front door.
Kennedy's Journal
This isn't how I thought it would be, I thought that once I became the slayer everyone else would start treating me like one. Still they treat me like a kid. I MEAN FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!! what's a girl got to do to get some respect around here?? I really feel like going down stairs and taking care of Faith myself. It's an affront to everything we stand for and even though she was a killer, it's an affront to her memory. I don't care if willow says it's Faith in there again. We should put her out of her misery. NO SLAYER DESERVES THAT FATE!! Buffy is twisted, turning the girl she loves into that thing... Oh well. We all know she has a thing for Vamps, but I won't let her hurt Faith this way. I won't let her stay something she was built to destroy.
Faith's Journal
Everything feels so different, like I'm me, but tainted somehow. I'm not a slayer anymore, but I still think like one, how could they do this to me?? How could they chain me to this wall and be something I hate? Information, I get that. I hate this, is this my punishment? To be condemned? No one's come to see me yet.. what's going on? Is it in Buffy? Or are they all gone? SOMEONE TALK TO ME!!!
Buffy slowly crept down the stairs, Faith was awake. She swallowed hard and began to creep back up again.
"I can smell you, ya know" Faith said quietly.
Buffy stopped dead in her tracks and walked further down the stairs, staring at the creature in front of her. Somehow Faith had managed to break free from her shackles. Buffy tightened her grip on the banister, ready to defend herself should she need to.
"Don't worry.. I don't bite" Faith muttered sarcastically. "Sorry" she said turning to see her friend. "It's the whole, demon thing.. takes some getting used to" she said softly before sitting down on Spike bed, she guessed it was really hers now. He was probably sharing B's.
"Why did you not tell me?" Buffy said emotionally. "I could have helped you" she said softly.
"No you couldn't! Giles and the others would have never accepted it, worse they might have found a way to get it out. You take it out and the First automatically becomes flesh. That's the bottom line, it was safer for all of you if I kept it to myself" Faith said coldly. "It would have passed to you."
"I would have taken it" Buffy declared.
"YOU WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO HANDLE IT!" Faith snapped. "But you'll see what I mean, when he creeps around inside your head and starts twisting things. They can do things to you wouldn't believe, it would have killed you" Faith said softer as she stood up to face the young slayer. "I couldn't let them" she said brushing a hand over Buffy's face, removing a tear.
"You're cold" Buffy said matter-of-factly, but there was more sadness in her voice than anything else. Faith smiled weakly and looked at her hand.
"Yeah, I guess I am. Sucks being at room temperature" Faith said as she rubbed the skin on the back of her hand.
"WHy did you play with me?" Buffy said, the vunerability seeping through her words.
"To throw you off track, keep you occupied" Faith said harshly.
"You know what I felt" Buffy told her almost mutely.
"Yeah, I did" Faith said walking away from the blond in front of her. "You should go back to them" she said.
"Kennedy's taking care of it" Buffy replied. Faith turned to her, a faint sadness showing in her eyes.
"Always thought she'd be next" she said distantly. "So this is what you felt like.." Faith said. "This distant, unconnected but still here empty feeling, that numb queesy sickness of feeling like you're being replaced" Faith said as she turned back to her and lowered her head. "I want you to kill me" she said.
Buffy's eyes widened in shock. "NO!" she protested.
"Why the hell not? You're a slayer, it's what you do! SLAY ME!" Faith said angrily turning back and to the wall.
"I can't do that" she said.
"Then get Kennedy down here, she will" Faith pleaded. "I don't want this.. It'll destroy me, B, don't condemn me to this" she cried and fell to her knees below the slayer's feet.
"Don't condemn me to doing this without you.. I lost you once.. don't let me lose you again" Buffy cried. "I'm pregnant Faith! You did this to me! The others won't understand, like you said, and now with Kennedy around.. you know what will happen when they find out... please don't make me go through this alone, I can already feel him inside my head. Don't make me do this alone, I can't, I don't have the strength left anymore!" Buffy cried.
Faith slowly bit back her and stood up, wrapping her arms around the older girl. "It's Okay B, I'll protect you, I'm not as strong as I used to be but I'll protect you all the same" Faith said as she kissed her forehead.
Kennedy watched the scene in front of her and her frown deepened. This couldn't go on. She had to finish this, for Faith's sake. And when she was done with the slayer/vampire abomonation, she'd take care of the mommy-to-be.
"I enter her even now, such a rich vault of memories, all so ready for twisting and plucking out of her pretty little head" Caleb told the First/Faith as it circled him.
"Good, just remember to clean it up after you come out" the First/Faith smiled as it walked over to a large wine barrel. "The last thing we need is them finding out" it said, facing him.
"It's too late for that, Faith already told the slayer" Caleb said.
"WHAT!?!" it screamed and charged over to him. The First/Faith picked Caleb up off the ground, the recent jump of the off-spring to a new host had given it a little more control of objects around it, the power would soon fade though, but for now. It was just enough to allow it to hoist him up into the air and crush his windpipe slightly.
"But... [choke] .. the new sl--ayer... has found out" he spluttered, The First/Faith smiled and dropped him.
"This is good news, that little brat HATES Buffy. Still, we should probably hurry up and try to hide the scythe from them. Faith won't hesitate to tell them everything she knows now, we'll have to work quickly on destroying the link you have to the Chylde. That witch might try and steal some memories from YOU" the First/Faith said.
"I'll do my best my queen" he said as he gasped suddenly as the First slid its hands down into his trousers and began to merge with him. "I'll do my very very best" he sighed as his eyes rolled back and he merged with Buffy.
Buffy's Dream
Faith curled up beside Buffy, she was breathing heavily, it comforted Faith, she couldn't do it herself and somehow the rise and fall of Buffy's chest helped ease the memory of that. Buffy drifted off to sleep, and Faith stood watch.
It was dark, there seemed to be nothing around them but dense forest, what was going? Where was everybody? For some reason Buffy felt like she'd been running through the woods forever following Faith, she was running faster than the older slayer could keep up with. Two hours ago she'd given birth and they were fleeing from Kennedy and the others with the baby in their arms. The Uber-vamps were tracking them too. Faith carried the baby and Buffy carried the Scythe. Together they fled from everything. The shouts calling into the Woods, the screams of the potentials as well. Buffy ran faster, she tripped and fell, climbing to her feet she saw that Faith was gone.
Panicked she screamed out Faith's name. No answer, she continued to the cabin where Faith and her had been heading, she ran to the door, it was opened, surely Faith and the child were inside. She ran inside. There was nothing there but a small girl.
"Where is she?" Buffy demanded.
"Mommy's gone" she said in a quiet giggly voice as she looked beyond Buffy.
Buffy followed her gaze. Ashes, Faith was... NO! Buffy turned back to the little girl. She was missing, Caleb stood in her place. Buffy lifted the Scythe and frowned, ready to fight.
"Oh come now, do we really have to be so impolite? I mean anyone else would think you were trying to kill me with that thing" he said sarcastically.
"Where's Faith?" Buffy snapped.
"Oh she's perfectly safe, she's back in the real world. Yes, I'm sure by now you got that this was a dream, well, some would call it a nightmare but still.." Caleb said as he walked over to the kettle and tried to turn it on, he pulled out a snapped cable. "Damn girl, you really broken. Not even the kettles in your head work. Don't you ever just take time off?" he said.
"You can't hurt me" Buffy said firmly.
Caleb walked over to her and nodded "I know, but they can" he said as he pointed to a row of all the major villians she'd ever fought.
"I'm gonna wake up" Buffy said, backing away from him.
"Of course you are, and you're going to get on with looking for that pretty little axe in your hand there. Problem is sweet thing, I already have it.. and you're out of time" he said as he shoved his hand into her stomach and twisted the baby around the proper way. She cried out in pain.
Faith almost jumped out of her skin when Buffy bolted awake and clunge to her shoulders and started crying uncontrollably.
"How could you not tell me about the weapon, Faith?" Buffy snapped.
"It was part of the condition, they'd have killed everyone if I had" Faith said defensively.
"And that makes it okay?" Buffy snapped.
Giles paced the room "This is most unprecedented" he murmured.
"You ask me we should stake her right now" Xander snapped.
"Hey! I happen to be in the room" Faith snapped.
"No one is sticking anything in anybody!" Buffy snapped about all the noise. Everyone stopped and looked at her.
"I'm Pregnant" she said.
"You're?" Willow began, dumbfounded.
"Pregnant" Faith said slowly.
"How? Who?" Giles said as he took off his glasses and walked over to her.
"Was it Spike?" Xander said "Because getting child support is gonna be a little hard now he's..."
"It was me" Faith said. "I did it" she continued and everyone visibly looked down at her pelvis area. She shook her head. "Not like THAT, it was the First, Caleb caught up with me in prison, we got a little bouncy n boom."
"Caleb? Boy you really DID cross the line" Xander said turning from her. "I mean, do you have no standards at all?"
"It was rape!" Faith snapped. Everyone fell silent. "He came into that prison and he RAPED me! So don't you dare make this into some me being selfish gig. It wasn't like that, and the reason I lied to you was to PROTECT YOU!" she said angrily before storming into the kitchen. Buffy followed her.
"I'm so sorry, we didn't know..." she said softly.
"You wouldn't would you? I'd never let you know" She said quietly. She sighed and walked outside, she didn't breathe, but she needed the air.
Kennedy walked alone the return journey home, she would have some fun explaining to Giles what his precious Buffy was keeping from him. She still didn't understand why Buffy would do that to Faith, they couldn't even be sure it really WAS Faith.. she died, was Buffy even herself? Sighing she walked quicker. Her little trip to the vineyard had been fruitless, not a sign of anyone. Walking quickly through the graveyard she quickened her pace. Something was following her, despite her heightened strength and new slayer status, she knew when to keep herself out of the danger zone.
"Well well" Spike said quietly, "Aren't you a little far from the nest?" he said, taking a drag of his cigarette.
"I'm just out walking" she said turning away from him.
"Out snooping would be more like" he said matter of factly.
"Whatever, I know you aren't real, just trying to stir up shit" she said finally facing him. "GO away, I know you're the First."
"Damn right there dolly, and I know you're mine" Caleb said as he grabbed her and forced her to the ground. She fought back with all her strength but cried out in pain, she couldn't stop him. "These things are pretty much instant" he whispered into her ear.
She screamed out for help but no one could hear her, he slipped her trousers off, and moments later, she felt him thrust himself violently into her, she bit down on his hand, it made no difference, he kept on with his invasion. Black blood spilling into her mouth, matching the soulless colour of his eyes. Crying her pleas into those empty dark things, he ignored her and just kept thrusting. Moments later, the First merged with him, and she screamed a soul burning cry as the First spilled into her as well. Ripping her of her body and casting the soul out.
He stood up, the young girl smiled back at him. The First had flesh.
Faith's Journal
I don't understand how this all happened, one minute I woke up in this body and all I wanted was to die (again) but then I took one look at Buffy, she looked so scared. Then it all came back, the memories, that night with Caleb.. I couldn't leave her, I'd been selfish enough. I couldn't leave her again, not and risk her suffering the way I had. It's easy to be strong when the victim isn't yourself. I'm still turning it all over in my head, Caleb had seemed so nice at first. Just a shoulder to cry on.. then after I slept with him, (willingly that time) everything changed. He started showing up in my nightmares and leaving me little notes, I started hearing his voice, seeing him in places he really shouldn't have been. Then he showed up in the night guard's uniform, by then I had some idea what was happening. I tried to escape, to get the hell out of there but he overpowered me. Him and the other guards would take turns when I'd been doped up too much to get away. I still remember random images. But it's like a broken picture. Can't see all the pieces clearly. I just wish I understood this baby thing better, why it's so important. I don't understand.. and that fact alone might kill us all.
Kennedy's Journal
What the hell is happening? Where am I? I'm in my body.. but not, it's like I've been pushed down inside myself and something else is calling the shots. Time is meaningless here. It stays the same moment, but spaces through thousands of years, of selfs each one wanting to be the dominant one. The real part of me, the slayer part of me knows that the First did this. That it somehow got inside me.. when Caleb... Had he done this to Faith? Was that how Buffy was?? I have to get to them. How though? Hopefully Willow would sense something is wrong. She has to. Come on Willow baby. I'm counting on you.
Faith paced the basement impatiently, what was taking so long? She wanted to talk to Buffy. She pulled at the chains around her wrists, these things were so damn uncomfortable. Kennedy hadn't been back long before she started throwing around her demands. One of them was that Faith be placed downstairs out of everyone's way.
She couldn't disagree with her there. Now that she had this demon running around inside her, they couldn't risk her being let around the house. She hadn't been merged with Caleb in a while. Perhaps the connection had been severed. Willow was working on a way to force the connection back the other way, maybe give them some insight into what they were planning. She heard the potentials rummaging around upstairs, peeking down at her.
She could hear almost everyhing, even the smells that had been such a shock to her system at first seemed to be getting clearer and more precise. Each was starting to make more sense to her, she could almost tell each scent of the potentials apart now. She also sensed a change in Kennedy, something.. dark. Something that caught her attention like a shiny diamond in a box of beads.
What the hell was going? She kicked at the side of the bed. She sighed, or as close to sighed as she could for someone of the undead. She almost laughed at herself. She'd been a vampire no longer than about six hours and already she was talking about herself in the Un- sense.
Didn't comfort her though. She slide down on the bed and listened for the sound of the voices coming from upstairs.
"Hey Baby" Willow said as Kennedy walked into bed with her.
"Hey" she murmured and crawled in below the covers. This was getting tiresome.
"What's wrong?" Willow said quietly. Kennedy had been different since she came back.. more distant or something.
"God, do I have to have a Dr Phil moment with you everytime I don't feel like talking?" she snapped.
"Yes.. I mean no.. I mean.. it's just you were so quiet I thought that you might have had something on your mind.. that maybe you'd wanna..." Willow stuttered.
"Well I don't, I've had a stressful day as it is, can't we just go to sleep?" she interrupted. Willow bit back the tears forming in her eyes and nodded, Slayer Kennedy rolled over and fell to sleep.
"I think I'm going to go downstairs and work on this..." Willow murmured weakly.
"You do that!" Kennedy snapped again. Willow mutely got out of the bed and looked at Kennedy's form, she didn't even look around. She stood still for a moment and then let a single tear fall down her cheek.
"Okay.. well I'm gonna go a-way now...so..." she said, trying to provoke some kind of tender response from her.
This time Kennedy turned around and sat up, staring Willow straight in the eye, at first her heart leapt with a little glimmer of hope and she looked back at Kennedy eagerly, waiting for her response. But all hope faded when she saw the nasty expression on her girlfriend's face.
"Yeah, you should go. And while you're at it, you should find yourself somewhere else to sleep" Kennedy said nastily.
"Somewhere else? What are you talking about?" Willow said in a hurt confused tone.
"You heard me, as in I'm a slayer now, and I can't be letting myself get distracted from my mission. Not by my friends, not by moments spent being all nicey nicey and sweet. And certainly not by little tramps like you" Kennedy spat.
"Tramp?" Willow repeated in disbelief. "How can you say those things to me?" she sobbed.
"What's the matter girly? You never used somebody until something else better came along? THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THIS WAS! SO DISAPPEAR FROM MY SIGHT LITTLE GIRL!! IT'S OVER!" Kennedy mocked her. Willow started sobbing and shaking her head.
"Don't you love me?" she cried.
"Awww you poor little thing, you actually believe this meant something to me. Well.. it did... it meant I got to stay in the loop everything that was going on and I didn't have to sleep on a huddled floor with everybody else. Now I don't need you. So do a girl a favour, get out and close the door behind you so I can some sleep" she said before rolling over and waiting for the sound of Willow to go running out of the room sobbing and downstairs.
NO! COME BACK!!! Kennedy cried as she heard Willow's footsteps running downstairs. YOU SICK BITCH!! WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE!! I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!! she screamed. First Kennedy smiled and looked in the mirror, the soul shook with fear. "Is that so?" it murmured.
Caleb walked through the vineyard, it was so beautiful out here at night. Soon he would taint it, and blood would seep into the Earth. He breathed in the surrounding air, the bringers were burning the documents. That was good, the less information the slayers could find, the better. Still, he was troubled. The most recent look into the eldest slayer's head had shown him a great many disturbing victories on her part. The girl had one thing all the other slayers he'd studied hadn't, a hell of an imagination. Her resourcefulness knew no limits, except maybe him. He would put the wretched bitch in her place. He would show her how to kneel before her God, true Glory had been a Goddess, but she had one fatal flaw.. she was a woman. In the end that was the thing above all else that failed her. Damn sisterly bonds.
He stifted himself a little further along the pathway, humming to himself, he hadn't even realised he was doing it until he stopped to listen for the sound of a car travelling up the drive way. He stopped and turned, a tall woman with blonde hair got out. Very businessy and professional. He smiled. "Can I help you?" he called.
"Ah! Mr Caleb Danvers, I presumme?" she said politely, and a little too confidently for his taste.
"How may I help you?" he said in his southern drawl.
"I was actually just coming to pass on a little bit of information" she smiled back.
"And what information might that be?" he said, leaning against the wall just in front of her.
"My name is Darma Kelpatrick, I'm here on behalf of Wolfram and Hart. One of our LA branches was recently handed to an old friend of your Master's, is that the right phrase? Anyway, we were wondering if you wanted to make a deal with us concerning this whole apocalyspe thing you got going on down here.." she laughed slightly.
"Oh yeah" he said, approaching her slowly. "What kind of deal might that be?" he said, standing in front of her, smiling.
"We want you to stop it, we are willing to fill in a slot for you somewhere in the next three centuries but as for now, your little plan has to cease.." she said.
"Is that right?" he said. She smiled and nodded, returning her warm gesture he looked away for a second and then back handed her. The woman fell to the floor clutching her face in shock. He forced her to the floor and pulled up the back of her skirt. "Let's send a little message to your employers telling them exactly how much that isn't acceptable" he whispered into her ear.
He forced her face into the dirt and ripped the underwear, she screamed out in pain and looked to the car full of men to help her, her eyes widened in fear. They were leaving her there, she screamed after them but was silenced by Caleb's hand clamping over her mouth, several hours later he left the body outside for the coyotes to feed on.
"Well?" Layla demanded.
"They refused, representative 252 has been terminated" the voice on the phone replied.
"Shit!" she said in an angry tone.
"Would you like us to send in another team?" he said cautiously.
"No, forget about it, I have another way we can settle this" she said, fingering the file sitting on the desk. Her fingers laced around the chain of the necklace with the sun god on it.
"Another way?" the voice questioned.
"Leave it to me" she said.
"What would you like us to do about the body?" he said after a moments silence. "Should we retrieve it?" he said.
"No," she said simply, "Just continue your observation on the slayers" she said firmly.
"Yes Ma'am" he said, putting down the phone.
She sighed deeply, and rubbed her sore neck, she re-applied the bandage. Looks like she'd have to inform Angel of this recent little development after all.
Willow walked quietly downstairs. She went into the kitchen and saw Buffy sitting with her head in her hands, she wiped a few tears away.
"Hey" she said quietly.
"Hey" Buffy replied as she looked up at her friend.
"Can't sleep?" Willow said curiously.
"Yeah, don't know how Faith did it but these cramps are killing me" BUffy said and paused for a moment. "Not literally I hope."
"I would have sensed it if it was" she replied, sliding into the seat next to her.
"Will are you okay?" Buffy said softly.
"I dunno. I think me and Kennedy split up tonight" she said sadly.
"Are you sure? Did she say it outright?" Buffy said in surprise.
"I've never been MORE sure" Willow said.
Giles' Journal
I can't believe she could have been so stupid, I mean, Faith of all people. I always knew she was rash but sleeping with the enemy.. I can't believe I never saw it sooner.. all the signs. Now My Beloved Buffy is carrying her burden. No one is going to hurt her while I'm around.. and if you ask me.. I need to get rid of this Vamp-Faith quickly.. God knows what kind of influence she'll have over her.
Buffy walked back to her own room, her stomach was throbbing. She winced and unbuttoned her trousers as she closed the door, her stomach was noticably larger. Was it meant to happen that fast? She pushed the clothes off the bed that she'd taken from Faith's over night bag and lifted the journal again. It almost felt wrong now that Faith was around again, still she couldn't resist the temptation.
Monday 18th July 1999
So this cool thing happened today, turns out that I'm not the only slayer. She's this tiny blonde thing, kinda uptight but in a cute way. Her name's Buffy, Gale wasn't sure, but yeah, she's in Sunnydale. Apparently this whole town is on some sorta hell mouth. Looks like they could use a second slayer around. I've done a lot of running over the last six weeks.. ever since Kakistos and the swamp incident. I guess it would be nice to settle in this place for a while.
Tuesday 19th July 1999
He followed me. Kakistos was here in Sunnydale, ripped up my place and killed the landlord. I don't know what I would have done if Buffy hadn't been there, I was sooo scared. Now he's gone. I'm free, earlier when Buffy left me off and we fixed the door... I slept without any nightmares for the first time since I lost Gale. Oh Gale, I'm so sorry. I never meant to run, but there was nothing I could do. I get that now. I guess I'm just trying to say goodbye.
Buffy closed the book. This was wrong, slowly she walked towards the drawer and placed the book inside. Maybe later.
Willow walked downstairs to feed Faith, she was so unhappy. How could this be happening? How could she be so wrong about what Kennedy was like? Kennedy was out patrolling now, she'd taken off a few hours after their little encounter upstairs. Even thinking about it stung her like a thousand hornets flying freely around her heart. She hated this, hated the way it made her feel, hated the helpless feeling. She wished she could just magick it all away. NO! she scolded herself firmly, she'd never go back there again, never sink back into that dark place. She brought herself out of her thoughts and managed to avoid falling down the last two steps.
Faith looked up, the expression on her face showed slight disappointment, she was expecting Buffy, Willow thought. Slowly she walked over to her cautiously, she didn't want to get too close, this was the Faith that had killed Wood just less than 24 hours before.
"Hey Red" she said softly, standing away from the table a good ten paces as she'd been taught in prison. She didn't want to intimidate her too much. Handy skills you get taught inside, Faith thought bitterly, one sure way to avoid a stake through the heart, don't give them any reason to fear you.
"Hey, you holding up okay?" Willow said, eyeing Faith's chains carefully.
"Yeah, better than can be expected" Faith said as she sat down on the bed.
"Well.. there's your.. blood, I didn't know how you like it so I just.." she said as she walked over to the bottom of the stairs, that was rewarded with a chuckle from Faith.
"I don't even know how I like it" she laughed. "I ain't exactly been like this for very long" she said, staring at the cup, the smell of the hot liquid was starting to wrap around her insides, making the beast inside her hunger. Her stomach grumbled. Loathingly she pushed the feeling aside, the last thing she wanted was to share her unsavory habit with others watching.
"I'm guessing it must be very hard for you" Willow said, sitting down on the chair by the banister.
"It's certainly not easy" Faith said, turning to face the Red haired girl better.
"I don't guess it would be, can I just ask...? What's it like?" Willow said. "I mean not that I have any desire to try it out myself, it's just I've never met anyone.. newly turned before. Angel said that he couldn't remember and Spike wasn't exactly the easiest person to talk to.." she said.
Faith smiled and looked into the distance for a moment.
"It's like you're you. But there's this big dark thing in the back of your mind, and it's like scratching and clawing at you.. I can see it sometimes if I concentrate, this big black emptiness.. it's pure evil. Void of feeling, of self, just pure hate and destruction. All it wants is to feed. To destroy, to have power, it's just this ultimate force that wants to suck everything out of the world and rejoice in the misery it causes" Faith said.
Willow swallowed, she knew that feeling, she'd become that feeling a few months ago. "I'm still me, I'm still the same Faith with the same messed up Childhood and the same Five By Five attitude. I just have this other thing in here, trying to claw its way out of me and take over" she said finally.
"I know the feeling" Willow said, she stood up and her and the Vamp- slayer looked at each other, a newfound respect formed between the two woman. Both had a similar demon, a similar darker side. Both had a war to fight, and both were completely crippled by their love for two separate woman who would never be able to understand the struggle they went through everyday, all the time. Faith nodded in understanding and Willow went upstairs to continue her research into the Baby First. Leaving the other girl to fulfill her own necessary evil.
...continued in part 41...