Hope's Drowning
by VixenRaign
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Buffy and company belong to
great and powerful Joss and the genius that is Mutant Enemy.
Author's Note: This is the first FanFiction I have ever posted, but
NOT the first I've written. I've been writing FanFiction since 6th
grade, and started a club at my high-school for readers
called "FanFic's Anonymous" (for people who were so hooked that their
grades were dropping {there were about 8 of us}). Please tell me
what you think; flames about grammar and spelling will be used to
roast marshmallows! So don't bother sending them! :-P
= = = (*That Sinking Feeling*) = = =
Buffy didn't know what to do, she had never seen Faith like this; so cruel, so heartless. It was quite unnerving for the blond.
"You don't understand Faith! You killed a man!" the petite blond yelled, trying to use the 'volume' angle to squeeze logic into the younger Slayer's brain.
"No, you don't understand!" Faith said, putting her most convincing face on. "I don't care." The truth was; she did care. She cared a great deal . . . for Buffy. All her actions were for the older girl's good, and here she was trying to ruin it. Faith had never known love, but if she had to guess what she felt for her fellow slayer that would be the label she'd put on all her feelings. The heat she felt from a touch, the joy she found in her company, even the shaky knees she got from her smile. Faith knew what she had done, and she had plans on how to fix it. She'd always known she was worthless, but she wasn't willing to drag B down.
"Faith!" Buffy begged tearfully, "How can you say that?" Faith knew she had to ditch the blond, waterworks would surely do her in.
"Look B," the brunette answered, looking strictly at ceiling of floor. "I did what I had to do. Now if you don't mind I have some more work to do." With that she walked over to the door and opened it. When Buffy didn't budge she walked over to her, grabbed her by the collar and pushed her out, slamming the door in her face.
Faith leaned against the door and slowly slid down, head in her hands. 'I may never hear you say "thank you" B, but knowing that you're safe will let me sleep at night.'
Buffy had slowly walked home from Faith's motel in a daze. She had never seen the brunette act so mercilessly before. It was unsettling. The young girl's passion for life had been one of the things Buffy had always admired about her. 'How could she say such things?' Buffy asked herself, totally oblivious to the fact that she had walked right past her house. Suddenly she felt a hand on her elbow. Willow was looking at her worriedly. Buffy quickly shook herself out of the haze she had planted herself into.
"Buffy?" Willow asked slowly, "Are you alright? Your house is that way." Willow said, indicating behind her.
"Oh!" Buffy answered, surprised as to how deeply she had sunk into her thought filled stooper. "Sorry, I was a little preoccupied."
"Last night's fight?" Willow ask, playing the best friend.
"Actually," Buffy started slowly, "I was thinking abo-"
"Faith?" Willow asked, a slight edge to her tone. The attitude did not go unnoticed by Buffy. She winced internally at realizing how poorly she had been treating her best friend since the young slayer's arrival. 'But that's all gonna stop!' Buffy told herself, 'I'll explain everything and do whatever it takes to get my best friend back!'. With that Buffy looped her arm through Willow's and led her back to her house.
"Will?" Buffy said urgently, "We need to talk."
With that she quickly pulled Willow through her front door and into her bed room. She had no idea what she was going to say, but she knew it would have to be the truth. Willow deserved nothing less.
"What's the matter Buffy?" Willow asked, worried that there was another Angel crisis.
"I have a problem Will," the slayer answered slowly, not sure what to say or how to say it. "But I know that if anyone can help me, you can."
"What's the matter? 242-year-old vampire problems?"
"Not quite." Buffy answered carefully, "More like Slayer problems . . . "
"Oh." Willow answered in a business-like tone, "Is there a Scooby meeting?" she asked eagerly.
"No," Buffy said, delicately. "I meant slayer problems as in 'Problems With Slayers' . . ."
"Oh. Well don't you think that Faith would be better-"
"Faith is the slayer problem . . ." the blond interjected.
"What do you mean?" Willow asked slowly, taking a seat on her best friend's bed.
"Well," Buffy began, trying to figure out how to word her feelings. "Faith is a slayer and she's causing problems." Buffy said with in a tone of 'Oh! That-Explains-Everything'.
"Buffy," Willow said, now becoming a bit exasperated with her friends beating around the bush. "I know that's what you meant, the point of my questions was 'What problem is Faith causing?' Just yesterday you wouldn't shut-up about her." At that last remark Buffy shot the red-head a look. "Sorry, but it's true." Willow responded, "You're acting like you did when Angel first came around." At this comment Buffy blushed slightly.
"I'm sorry Will," Buffy told her friend sincerely, "But I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so confused!" Buffy said on the line between frustration and sorrow. Buffy sat on her floor with her back against the bed.
"Buffy, just tell me what's wrong! What's confusing you?" The red- head pleaded, worry evident in her tone.
"Everything was as perfect as it could be," Buffy said so quietly is was almost a whisper, "And then Faith shows up and turns my little world up-side-down."
"What do you mean?" Willow said, slipping down to the floor next to her friend.
"I had life that was good enough to work at, I had family and friends worth fighting for, a boy-friend like no other in existence, and a job I was born to do and did it better than anyone else."
"What changed?"
"Everything." Buffy stated quietly. She looked at Willow and knew that she could trust her. She deserved truth, and that's what she would get.
"Will?" Buffy asked slowly, her voice shaking from fear, "You know how you said I acted around Faith the way I used to act around Angel…?"
"Yeah?" Willow asked slowly.
Buffy looked Willow in the eyes and just let it all go. Her hurt, her confusion, everything that she felt she let show in her eyes. And Willow knew. Here eyes widened in surprise, this was not the problem she had expected.
"You mean you-" Buffy nodded.
"And that's why you-" another nod from the blond. Willow needed a moment to take it all in. 'It did explain a lot.' The red-head told herself.
"Buffy?" Willow said slowly, as though she was afraid of the little blond running away from any harsh words she might say. "Would you mind explaining it a bit more?" she said with a worried smile.
Buffy just looked down at her hands, deep in thought. She had never been very good at expressing her feelings, and right now she was feeling a lot.
"Do you remember Kendra?" Buffy asked, not looking up.
"Yeah."
"When she was around, I felt different. Like maybe the world was a livable place. Like, maybe, I wouldn't always have to feel so alone. Even when she had gone back home after our encounter with Spike and Drusilla, just knowing that there was some-one out there like me was a great comfort. After she died I felt so alone. I never thought they'd send another Slayer . . . at least not until I died." Buffy took a deep breath and sighed. "All the Slayer lore tells of 'One girl in all the world' and so on and so forth, and no matter how many times I hear it and no matter how much I try and block it out . . . it starts to get to you after a while! My destiny was to be alone, and the little relief I got when Kendra was around had died. I started to believe that solitude was my destiny."
"But?" willow asked slowly, urging her friend to continue.
"But," Buffy said, unable to suppress a small smile. "then there was Faith. Part of being a slayer is being able to sense Vampires, and for some reason (since this is supposed to be the first time there's been two Slayers existing simultaneously) we can also sense each other. It's a different kind of tingle though. Vampires make the hairs on the back of my neck vibrate (not a pleasant feeling), but sensing another slayer is like a power boost. Everything is more intense, and suddenly your whole body kicks into slayer-mode." At this Buffy started to speak more softly, as if saying it too loud would make it all disappear.
"I felt her Willow. That first night at the Bronze I could feel her. At first I thought it was me, like maybe it was my body's way of telling me 'Hey! It's slaying time!', but then I saw her. And the power boost was so intense. There was no mistaking it, the girl was born to slay."
"I had no idea you felt so alone." Willow whispered softly.
"I'm not alone anymore." With that Buffy smiled. "I'm no longer 'The Chosen One' but rather the Ying in the slayer Zen. I'm glad she's here Wills . . . `cause I don't think I could do this alone."
"Does she know?" Willow asked slowly.
"No." Buffy sighed. "She and I are having problems right now. We're having a heated debate over what a slayer can and cannot do."
"Well, as always, my suggestion would be to go talk to her." Willow didn't know what to do in this situation, so she tried to go with what she knew. All she wanted was to see the slayer happy, and Faith seemed to genuinely make Buffy happy.
"I think you're right Will," the small blond said with quiet determination, "I'm gonna go talk to her! Try and sort a few things out." With that she turned smilingly to her best friend and said "See!" Buffy said happily, "You always have the right answers." Buffy gave her friend a hug and walked with her to the front door.
"You'll call me later to tell me how this goes right?" Willow asked nervously, anxious to hear the end results of their conversation.
"Call you as soon as I can."
"Are you going now?"
"Well," the blond replied gradually, "I guess there's no time like the present."
Faith had finally finished. She had spent all afternoon doing the last of her laundry, packing up what little stuff she had, and getting ready to leave. She didn't like what she had to do, but it was the only choice she could think of. She was going to work for the mayor. She figured maybe if she switched sides she'd be able to deal with her problems. She could be as bad as she wanted to be, she wouldn't have to worry about breaking the law, and with that kind of power she could properly dispose of all the evidence of her murder. But most importantly she could make sure that Buffy would be safe. She could keep an eye on the people watching her, and make sure she was kept out of harm's way.
"But then why," Faith quietly asked herself, "Does it feel so much like betrayal?" Faith didn't know what else to do, and this was a plan that made sense. 'Like mom always used to say "You always hurt the ones you love" . . . I just wish I didn't have to hurt her so much.'. Faith quickly packed the last of her weapons and grabbed the money she hid in the lamp. Just as she was stuffing it into her pocket she heard a knock at the door.
Faith froze. She was 2 weeks past due on her rent and if the manager saw her getting ready to bolt she'd never get out of there in time. She was quickly shoving her bag behind the bed when she heard a voice accompanied by a second knock.
"Faith? Are you in there?" Buffy called.
"Shit!" Faith whispered, 'I wish it had been the manager!' She slowly made her way over to the door and opened it a bit. Outside stood a blushing Buffy with an anxious look on her face. 'She's even cute when she's nervous' Faith thought.
"Hey Faith?" Buffy asked quietly, "Can I come in? I'd really like to talk to you." She was so cute Faith forgot about the state of her room and let the little blond in. Buffy looked around and her facial features changed from ones of nervousness to ones of concern. She could tell Faith was getting ready to run.
"So what did you want to talk about?" Faith asked as if the room wasn't think full of awkward feelings.
"That's not really all that important right now." Buffy said sternly, "Were you planning on leaving?!"
"Maybe." Faith whispered.
"And you weren't gonna tell me?" Buffy whispered.
"I wasn't gonna go far!" She quickly defended herself before she realized she couldn't explain it to Buffy.
"Is this because of me?" Buffy whispered.
"No!" Faith quickly rushed over to her, "No Buffy it's not because of you at all!" 'Actualy,' Faith thought, 'It's all about you, just not the way you think it is.'
"Faith," Buffy started slowly, fighting back tears over the thought of Faith leaving, "If this is about that guy, I'm sure that if we just talk to the Counsel then I'm sure they'll help us! It was a mistake after all, and one I could have made just as easily as you. They're watchers, and their job is to watch us. Who are they without us? They'll have to help us Faith, cause whatever happens to you happens to me too." With that she pulled Faith into a tight hug. 'Wow . . .' Faith thought 'That wasn't the answer I was expecting!'
"B?" Faith whispered, "I don't want to run anymore." With that they stopped hugging, both a bit teary-eyed.
"Then I'll take you to the place that you are always welcome to run to." With that she picked up one of Faith's bags and motioned for her to do the same.
CHAPTER 2: Learning To Recover
= = = (*Vauge Explanations*) = = =
Willow sat in her room nervously. It was nerve-racking waiting for Buffy's call. She had need waiting by her phone since their talk that morning. She wanted so badly for things to go alright, Buffy deserved to be with some one who made her happy the way Faith did. She couldn't take it anymore. She had last talked to Buffy at about 10:30am, and it was now 11:30pm and she was still waiting for the slayer's call.
"That's it!" Willow said, Resolve-Face firmly set, "I'm calling her!" She picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number. She got a busy signal. "Fine…" the red head told herself, "I can wait a few more minutes." She couldn't. About 30 seconds later she picked up the phone and pressed re-dial. There was no busy signal this time.
"Hello?" said a tired voice.
"Buffy?" she asked, worry obvious in her tone.
"Wills? Hey, what's up?" Buffy asked in a lazy tone.
"BUFFY! You said you'd call me?! That was 13 hours ago! What happened? How did things with Faith go?" just then Willow heard a familiar voice faintly ask 'you sure you won't mind me borrowing this?'
"Uh, fine. Things are fine Willow, I'm sorry I didn't call sooner . . ."
"Buffy . . ." Willow started slowly, "Who was that talking, and why did you not call me resulting in panic attacks?!"
"That was Faith," Buffy stated hesitantly, "She's going to be staying here for a while . . ."
"Wow," Willow whispered into the receiver, "I had no idea things would go that well."
" . . . I didn't tell her . . ."
"WHAT?! Then what the heck is she doing there?"
"Well . . . you remember how I told you we had an argument over what a slayer can and can't do?"
"Yeah."
"Well, now's probably not the best time to get into the details, but there will be a Scooby meeting about it, and that's why I didn't get to call you. We had to involve the counsel, so we had to spend a few hours on the phone making transatlantic phone calls and even more time calling Giles . . . it's very complicated. But you will know soon, promise."
"Okay," Willow said slowly, trying to take in what little information she was given, "But why is Faith there? What happened so that she ended up at your house?"
"That's pretty simple," Buffy stated tiredly, "When I went to her motel to talk to her she had all her stuff packed and she was getting ready to run away. We talked and I told her that I wasn't gonna let her leave. So then I took her home, and now she's gonna stay here with me for a while." With that the slayer heaved a sigh. Willow could tell she must be very tired.
"Okay." Willow was glad she was on the phone, that way Buffy couldn't see the goofy smile on her face. "I'll let you get to bed. Promis to give me the details tomorrow?"
"I promise I will as soon as possible" came the response.
"Good-Night Buffy" she said happily.
"Good night Wills."
With that they both hung up. Willow was glad that Faith hadn't run away, she didn't want to think what would have happened if Buffy hadn't stopped her. She was looking forward to getting to know the brunette better, she seemed like a fascinating person.
= = = (*Bed Times and Fair Trades*) = = =
Faith was nervous, she had never really done the sleep-over thing before. She didn't really have a normal childhood that provided her with a home you'd take friends to, and she never let her one- nighters stick around. This was going to be quite a new experience. Buffy had just hung up the phone from her conversation with Willow and flopped down on the bed. The little Slayer was obviously very tired. Faith cleared her throat to get the blond's attention. Buffy opened her eyes to look at Faith expectantly.
"Um . . ." Faith started slowly, "Are you okay if I borrow this to sleep in?"
"Yeah, it's totally fine, help your self to anything you want." 'I wish you really meant that' Faith thought, 'cause that cold shower didn't help cool my jets at all . . .' Buffy was wearing a flannel pajama top and an old pair of boxers to bed. Faith had never seen such beautiful legs in her life! 'Buffy should wear more reveling clothing' Faith thought, but then realized she didn't want to share the view with others.
"I am so beat, I could sleep for days." Buffy said through a yawn.
"I know what you mean, Slayer or not 7 hours of sleep is not gonna get me through tomorrow . . . Hey B?" Faith asked slowly.
"Yeah Faith?"
"Where am I gonna sleep?" This was the question Faith had been avoiding all night. She knew where she wanted to sleep, but didn't want to get her hopes up.
"In here with me." Buffy answered laughingly, as though it was a silly question.
"Okay, where do you keep your sleeping bags?" Faith was just happy to be sharing a room with the petite blond, the idea of sleeping on a couch was too reminiscent on her former home-life.
"Don't be silly Faith," Buffy answered seriously, "I'm not letting you sleep on the floor! You can just share the bed with me." Now Faith was a little unsure about what to do.
"Trust me," Faith said nervously, "After that Motel bed, the floor would be a welcome thing. And besides! We don't know how long I could be staying here! I don't want to crowd you." She didn't want Buffy to feel like Faith was trying to invade her life.
"Faith. It's okay. I want you to be as comfortable as you can be. This is your home for as long as you want it to be, that means you are at least entitled to a bed." 'Buffy obviously didn't grow up in my house' Faith thought.
"Okay, but if I start to crowd you, or cramp your style, I want you to tell me." With that she inched towards the bed.
"So . . ." Buffy almost whispered, "What side do you want?"
"Your bed, you pick first."
"Um, I dunno, maybe the left?"
"The left when you're in it, or the left when you're facing it?"
"The left when you're in it?" Buffy answered in an unsure tone.
"Sure," Faith said smiling, "I'll take the other left." Buffy giggled and pulled back the covers.
"I am so ready for sleep . . . "
"Wait a second!" Faith said in a reprimanding tone, "What about your homework?"
"What about it?" Buffy hadn't climbed into bed yet and was giving Faith one of her 'are-you-on-crack?' looks.
"Nuh-uh B," Faith stated seriously, "If I'm gonna stay here I'm gonna make sure you use your time productively. You are going to graduate on good terms even if it means I have to deprive you of sleep."
"You can't be serious . . ."
"I am B. I'm not letting you in this bed until you've completed at least 2 assignments." And with that Faith pulled the covers back to the regular positions.
"Alright," Buffy said slowly in a menacing tone, "But then you have to do your homework . . ."
"Uh, B?" Faith said in a mocking tone, "I don't have homework."
"Oh yes you do." And with that she dove for Faith's bag. She unzipped it and started to go through it, pulling out some of the clothes and then putting them back in.
"Hey!" Faith said, barely holding in a laugh, "What are you doing, going through my stuff?" Then in a whisper she said " . . . underwear sniffer . . ." that got Buffy to stop. She turned to Faith with a shocked look on her face. Faith lost it, she started laughing so hard she probably woke the whole street. Then Buffy stood up and handed Faith a book. It was the leather bound diary her first watcher had given her when she had been called, she hadn't really used it all that much since her watcher's death, and when she did write in it, it usually wasn't to write about Vampires.
"If I have to read 10 pages about World War One, then you have to write at least 5 pages about slaying in your Slayer diary." With that she forced the book into Faith's hands, smirking. Faith grimaced. She really wasn't in a writing mood.
"Five pages?!" Faith groaned.
"Do it, or no deal." Buffy stated in a confirming tone. "That's a pretty fair trade . . . "
"Fine!" Faith said pulling a pen from the spine of the book, "But you better not half ass your way through your work!" and with that they both got to work.
= = = (*Faith's No Shakespeare…*) = = =
(Faith's Diary entry from 'Bed Times and Fair Trades')
Dear Diary,
Hey. It's me. I'm back again. I know I haven't written like I used to, but it's just not the same. I never really got any nice presents from my folks, so when my watcher gave me this really amazing diary before she even knew me . . . it meant a lot. It almost doesn't seem right to put in an entry without her here to ask for help with me spelling. I'll really miss her.
BIG NEWS: you'll never guess where I am right now. B's bed! That's right, ON her BED! Bet you never saw that coming! Remember how I always used to say "If my life sucks this much now, then it must REALLY pick up later . . . ? I think it just has. Do you remember that accident I told you about? The guy I attacked? Well, some how the worst mistake of my life has landed me in the one place I never thought I'd get: I'M ROOMING WITH Elizabeth Anne Summers!!! I freaked out. I had this whole plan to fix it (and you know me, I never make plans {which is probably why this didn't work}): I took the body and weighted it down, then I dumped it in the lake, then I went back to the motel and packed all my things. I was gonna switch sides. I was ready to do it too! I knew that the Mayor would hire me, who wouldn't want a slayer on their side?! I knew that he had the money, power, and influence to hide the evidence of the mistake, and that way B would never get blamed for the stupidest thing I ever did. I knew my plan could have very well gotten me killed, but at least then a new slayer would be called and then SunnyHell would be back to normal: Faithless.
But then the most amazing thing happened . . . B came by the hotel just as I was about to walk out the door. For the first time in my life some one didn't want to see me go. She looked like she was torn between yelling at me for leaving without a 'Good Bye', and crying because she was gonna miss me. B was actually gonna miss me! Told me so herself on the walk back to her house. She took me home, and told her mom the story while I took a shower upstairs. Mrs. S was totally understanding! She said that she didn't want me going back to that filthy motel, and that I was welcome to stay as long as I wanted. "Not as long as you need, as long as you WANT. I'll take nothing else." That's what she said to me! Wow . . . I wish my mother had been more like Joyce. I bet Joyce would never hit Buffy; she just doesn't seem the type. She's a total TV mom, but I don't really see how that's a bad thing.
Then we had some calls to make. We had to call Giles, then he came over, we told him everything that happened. He recorded it all on tape, then he stayed on the phone for a while talking to the Counsel. Then he called Wesley, told him what was going on and that the Counsel was looking into the matter, and that he was going to send the tape with our statements on it to London by way of express mail. They don't think there's any reason to have a trial, but they do need to recover the body. Wesley, and 2 watchers from the California Counsel's Office, went down to the lake where I told them I had dumped it. They're doing a scuba search for the corpse. They'll do an autopsy and then see if it supports out statements.
Giles took our statements in a weird way, first he had me tell my side of what happened, then he took B's version, then he took one from both of us at the same time. He made B go up to her room while he took mine, then he made me wait in the kitchen while he took her statement. (Gotta love that Slayer hearing! I heard every word of what she said). Just when the world throws you another curve and you think you've got no one on your side, some one walks in and surprises you. All the while B told Giles what happened she kept saying "we", and "us". She even said "it's as much my fault as it was hers.", and "Had we started walking down the alley and I had been on her other side it would have been me that staked that man."
I don't believe this 100%, but there's no way to prove it without a time machine. She did tell me to stop! But by then my stake was on its way into his heart, and by the time my brain had registered what exactly she had said, I had already removed it. If I could change one thing from my fucked up life it would be those few seconds. Not the day my Dad was shot, not the day my mom gave me up, but that one minute that change my world. I would do anything to give back the life I took, but no amount of wishing or hoping or praying can change that. I killed a man, and I will save hundreds more before I die . . . but none of that will matter, cause that one will be gone.
The Summers ladies are a real help. Joyce's helping by fussing over my, being the mom I never had. Giles is being a great Watcher, doing the business in a friendly and family like way. And B . . . well, B's just being B. Amazing as ever. Telling me "We'll get through this" and "It'll all turn out okay" and some times she sounds so sure, that I just can't help believing her. She's breaking all the rules that I laid down, and yet I can't help but love her. Rule 1 was: You're on your own side, and that's all you'll ever need. Rule 2 was: Roots are for trees, and a Slayer is not a plant. Rule 3 had always been: Never fall in love, `cause those who love you will always leave you.
That little blond sure knows how to turn a world up-side-down . . . for once in my life I'm not alone, and I like it that way. I may not be the Chosen One, but being a part of the Chosen Two isn't half bad! I want to be a part of the Scooby team, I want to have Slayerettes . . . even if they're a little dorky, they start to grow on you after you get to know them. As for roots, I have a home!
I've never had a home before really. Buffy said this was my home now, that no matter what happened, as long as I had legs to run, that this house would be a home that I was welcome to run to.
As for rule 3 . . . that one's been broken for a while now, as we both know. Who on the face of the earth could know B and not love her? The way she can look at things, and although she sees the bad, she has this ability to look past it and see the good underneath. She's an amazing Slayer too! I don't think I have ever met anyone or anything that could kick my ass, but I know that B could wipe the floor with me! Plus . . . I don't think I've ever met anyone as beautiful as she is. She's got these eyes that look green, but they're really hazel. They're a soft brown with gorgeous green flex in them. They look the best when she's laughing, they really do sparkle if you look close enough. Her skin is so smooth too! I don't know how she does it. My hands are all callused and worn from all the years of weapons and stakes I use while fighting. It's soft and smooth and warm, like porcelain. Plus she's got an incredible body. But she's such a loving person that it's hard not to love her too . . .
no matter how hard I try.
-Faith
P.S.: Killed a few Vamps last night, don't know how many…
CHAPTER 3: From Confession To Redemption
Notes: Poems are the work and property of Shel Silverstein, I do not own them and I am making no money in my use of them.
= = = (*Know Your Fellow Slayer*) = = =
Faith and Buffy had both finished their assignments at about the same time. Buffy had just put her things away in her binder and Faith was signing her name in her Diary. Faith got up to put the book back in her bag.
"So," Faith asked "What 2 assignments did you do?"
"English and History."
"What was the English assignment?" Buffy pulled out a book and tossed it to Faith.
"It's from my Shakespeare class. I don't know why I signed-"
"Othello!!?" Faith asked excitedly, "I love this book! Man, you consider this homework? I wish I got to read my favorite book for school. They always made us write and correct essays so we'd perfect our grammar . . . That's the stuff I can't stand."
"You've read Othello?" Buffy asked, skeptically.
"Yeah, I'm a huge Shakespeare Fan. This is one of my more favorites. His sonnets are cool too, I love how he puts them into his plays." With that she opened the book and started reading one of the pages with great interest. "What parts have you read so far?"
"Um, I just started it. We just finished A Merchant Of Venice, and now we're starting this. I didn't read the last one, Willow just explained it to me before the test."
"Then you're missing out! That ones a good one too. It's all about who you can trust and who you can't, lies, deception, greed, racism, love . . . it's a good read." Buffy laughed. "What?"
"Nothing," Buffy answered, slightly amused. "I just never saw you as a Shakespeare fan."
"Yeah," Faith said looking up, "I guess I just don't look like the reading type." She chuckled too.
"So what else have you read?"
"Well," Faith started slowly, "I've always loved Children's books, they are really easy to follow. I love how the bad guys always loose and the goods guys make it look easy. I guess it makes slaying easier, helps you believe you're gonna win." She said smiling, "I like those new books by the Scottish woman; J.K. Rowling. The Harry Potter books have so much detail. Everything from schools, to banks, to postal services. It's amazing how well thought out they are. All the little details make it all the more believable."
"Wow . . ." Buffy was slightly taken aback, she didn't see Faith as the reading type. "What are some other books you liked?"
"Well," Faith put Othello down on Buffy's backpack, and climbed into bed. "I LOVE scary stories. Poe wrote some of the best scary stories I've come across. He was a really twisted guy! He married his 14-year-old cousin, and when she died he kept her frozen with dry- ice for years! After that he went insane and drank himself to death. He had a great flare for writing. I also love poetry. Poetry is high on my list of favorites. But, like books, children's poems are my preference."
"Who's your favorite poet?" Buffy asked as she slid into bed next to the younger Slayer.
"Oh no B!" Faith answered, giggling slightly, "That one I'm taking to the grave!"
"Please . . . ?" the little blond asked, doing her best puppy eyes. Faith caved.
"Alright, but promise you won't tell?" Buffy nodded. "You realize that if you do I'll break your neck right?"
"I know! Spill already."
" . . . . . Shel Silverstein . . . . " Faith was scarlet, head to toe.
"Really? I used to love his poems. My mom used to read them to me when I was sick. Which one's your favorite?"
"I have an old favorite and a new one. The old was from before I became the Slayer."
"How does the old favorite go?"
"THE WORST:" Faith cleared her throat "When singing songs of scariness, Of bloodiness and hairiness, I feel obligated at this moment to remind you, Of the most ferocious beast of all, Three thousand pounds and nine feet tall-, the Glurpy Slurpy Skakagrall-, Who's standing right behind you!" at that they both laughed.
"I can see why that may have no longer been your favorite poem since you became a Slayer." Buffy said regaining her composure.
"Yeah, hits a little too close to home."
"So what's your new favorite poem?"
"LOVE: Ricky was 'L' but he's home with the flu, Lizzie our 'O' had some home work to do, Mitchell the 'E' prob'ly got lost on the way, so I'm all LOVE that that could make it today." Faith was happy she remembered the whole thing.
"Those are some really nice poems. When exactly do you do all this reading?"
"When I would have been at school. I used to help out in my public library back in Boston. I was The Story Lady. I was the woman who sat in the chair and read to the kids on the carpet . . . ." then as though she realized what she was saying she stopped and turned to Buffy, a scared look on her face. "You ever tell anyone what I just told you and you are dead meat." Buffy just smiled warmly.
"Your secret's safe with me." Faith relaxed a little. "Come on, let's get some rest. A cranky Slayer is a careless Slayer." And with that she shut off the light. Then before she lost the nerve to do it she reached over and hugged Faith. "Good night" she whispered.
"Night." Whispered Faith. 'Wow . . .' Faith thought to herself, 'She must really care about me.'
= = = (*Confessing One's Sins*) = = =
'She's so cute when she's sleeping . . .' thought Buffy. Then without a seconds hesitation she pulled the blanket off the bed in one sweep. Faith's initial reaction was to curl into a little ball and moan in exasperation. That same moan sent shivers up Buffy's spine.
"Come on Faith," Buffy wheedled, "We need to get to school."
"I don't go to school . . ." Faith complained half asleep.
"Faith." Buffy said in a more business like tone, "We need to get to school so we can talked to Giles and Wesley. We need to arrange a Scooby meeting." Then as a side note she added, "Plus the library got a new shipment of books . . ." at that Faith jumped out of bed.
"Cool! Let's go, I wouldn't want to keep the Counsel waiting." She started to grab some clothes from her bag to get dressed.
"I'll be in the bathroom brushing my teeth while you get dressed. Meet me down stairs in a couple of minutes and we'll go." Buffy quickly did her morning bathroom stuff and hurried down stairs to wait for Faith.
"Ready to motor?" Faith asked a little calmer than she had been before. Buffy looked the brunette up and down. She was decked out in deep red-leather pants, a black tank-top, and her classic steel- toe Docs. Buffy giggled.
"You're going to school in THAT?" Buffy asked, laughing. Faith looked down at her clothes.
"What? What's wrong with my clothes?" Faith asked pulling on a dark denim jacket.
"Nothing," Buffy answered, "You're just gonna cause a riot is all." With that Buffy grabbed her bag and opened the door for Faith. They walked along quietly exchanging small chitchat. Until . . .
"I had the oddest Dream last night, it made no sense."
"Really?" Faith asked, "Who was in it?"
"Angel, mostly, but all the Scoobies show up at one point or another."
"Really . . . ?" Faith asked in a teasing tone, "Do I want to ask what you and Angel were up to?"
"It wasn't like that!" Buffy said, laughing, "It was kinda Slayer related without really being slayer related."
"Okay," Faith said still slightly teasing, "But I'm gonna ask you again: What was it like? I mean the guys dead, it must have been a little weird?" Faith asked, playing the curios friend.
"Yeah, I guess it kinda was . . ." Buffy said, blushing "I've always wondered if that makes me a Necrophiliac . . . "
"What does that mean?"
"It's a clinical term for some one who likes to have sex with dead people."
"So you didn't just have the sex, you liked the sex?" Faith said, chuckling at Buffy's slip of tongue.
"Not really . . ." Buffy whispered, forgetting that Faith had Slayer hearing.
"YOU DIDN'T?!" Faith yelled. Buffy flushed scarlet. She wished the world would open up and swallow her whole 'Funny how that never happens when you want it to!' Buffy thought. The little blond groaned in frustration.
"So B?" Faith asked slowly, "What was Soul-Boy doing wrong?"
"Nothing!" Buffy shouted, " . . . at least I don't think."
"Then what was wrong?"
"He was kinda cold."
"Yeah, guys can be mean in bed-"
"No!" Buffy said giggling slightly, "I mean he was cold! As in not warm. It was weird too, I got the feeling he hadn't had any in a while."
"Let me guess!" Faith said boldly, "Missionary for about 2 minutes, you had to fake it, but in the end he had to finish you off with his fingers?" Faith laughed at her own joke, whereas Buffy looked stunned.
"Hey!" she said indignantly.
"Sorry I-"
"He didn't!" she sounded pretty mad now.
"Look I was jus-"
"He just fell asleep afterwards! That was rude! I bet he didn't even think of that!" Now Faith was the one blushing. She had only been joking when she said those things about Angel. "Selfish Vamp!" Buffy growled, now obviously pissed off.
"Hey," Faith said, trying to cool the older Slayer down, "I know what that's like. In fact it happened to me recently, except that instead of Xander falling asleep I just kicked him out." Buffy nodded, then her head shot up.
"XANDER?!"
"Umm . . ." Faith stammered.
"You slept with Xander?!" Buffy sounded almost hurt.
"It was the post Slayage Bad decision of the century, they'll put it in the record books." Faith said trying to sound funny.
"FAITH!" Buffy yelled, "This is huge!"
"Trust me when I say it was anything but huge." Faith said, using her thumb and forefinger to indicate the boy's lack of masculinity.
"That was more than I ever wanted to know about Xander." Buffy cringed.
"What do you guy know about Xander?" Willow said, jogging to catch up with them. Buffy gave Faith a pointed look, then turned to Willow.
"That he's a really loyal guy. He's been a helpful ally over the years, isn't that right Faith?"
"Yeah," Faith said playing along, "Real helpful."
"Right," Willow said looking at Faith skeptically, "So what's the deal Buffy, you gonna spill about the busy phone line last night or what?" Faith paled, she was not looking forward to telling all of Buffy's friends what she had done.
"Um, Will?" Buffy asked gently, "Can that wait till later? Faith and I still have a few things we need to work out with Giles."
"Yeah, sure." Willow looked worried. Buffy gave her a reassuring smile and then walked up the front steps of Sunnydale High.
= = = (*There's Someone Else*) = = =
Willow and Buffy trotted along happily chatting as best friends do, when Xander came and tapped Faith on the shoulder. He looked nervous about something.
"Hey Faith." He said quietly, "Can I talk to you for a second?"
"Sure X-Man what's up?" Xander led her over to the table in front of the drink machine and motioned for her to sit down.
"Look, Faith, about what happened between us the other night," He started slowly, "It really meant a lot to me, and I was wondering if-"
"Wait!" Faith interrupted him abruptly, "Look, Xand, I'm sorry I let that happen. It was wrong of me to do that, I know . . . But the thing is . . . it's my fault. I should have stopped it before it got out of control. I'm sorry X-Man, but if you're gonna ask what I think you're gonna ask, then the answer is 'No'. Look, I didn't mean to lead you on or anything. I've had more than a few one- nighters, but this is the first time it's ever happened to a friend." Xander bowed his head dejectedly. "You're a good friend Xander, I really mean that. I hope this doesn't come between us in the future `cause you're your great to work with."
"Why?" Xander asked, "Why not?"
"Do you want the truth or what you'd expect me to tell you?"
"The truth . . . please?" he asked, sounding hurt. Faith looked down at the table in front of her, trying to figure out what to say.
"I think I'm in love." She told him quietly. Xander's head shot up like a cork from a bottle. "Bet you didn't expect that from me." She said, laughing nervously.
"Who?"
"Don't push your luck." Xander tried to look at anything but Faith, but it was hard. He wasted answers.
"Hey Faith?" Xander asked, sounding nervous, "Between me and you . . . Was I any good?" Faith smiled at his daring, and decided to reward him with a little confidence.
"You were okay." She said smiling, "if I didn't know better I'd have said you'd done it a few times before." She smiled at him and got up heading for the library, Xander at her heals.
= = = (*Worry Wonder and Waterworks*) = = =
When Faith and Xander walked in their eyes were greeted with the sight of a very tired Giles talking to Wesley, who also looked like he could use some sleep. Faith walked over to the table and sat next to Buffy, Xander sitting across from her next to Willow. Just then Oz wandered in, resulting in a big Willowy Smile from the redhead. He walked over and quickly kissed his girlfriend before taking a seat at the head of the table. Giles cleared his throat to get the Scooby Gang's attention.
Buffy's eyes went buggy and she started waving her hands in front of her self, mouthing the word 'NO' franticly. Giles got the idea and told the rest of the students to go to class, but asked Faith and Buffy to stay behind. The rest of the Slayerettes left the Library wondering what was going on. Faith and Buffy followed Giles and Wesley into their office.
"Ah, yes, Buffy . . ." Giles paused for a minute, trying to think of what to say to his charge. "I have, uhm, er, news. Wesley and the dive team retrieved the body last night and one of the other divers is accompanying it to London as we speak to be examined. They wish to do an autopsy to make sure that the wounds and in favor of your testimonies, but the water damage done to the remains may affect the evidence. They still don't see any reason for a formal trial but they may chose to send their own examination team over to re-question you." Giles paused, wanting to be cautious with this next bit of information. The old librarian took off his glasses and polished them with a handkerchief from his pocket.
"They have assured me that they will look at the case objectively, and will remember how important it is to have a slayer on the Hellmouth . . ." Giles paused, not sure weather he should be the one to tell Buffy this next piece of information. "But should they decided that steps must be taken, they will probably remove a slayer from the Hellmouth." At this both girls went pale as death.
"What?" Buffy asked, so quiet that even Faith with her Slayer hearing had trouble understanding.
"They have discussed the possibility of removing one of you from Sunnydale." Giles bowed his head, knowing this was not welcomed news.
Faith was speechless. 'Typical!' Faith thought, 'I finally find a place that I can call home and my destiny once again gets in the way. Jeez! Doesn't – '
Faith never got to finish that though because a loud wail interrupted her thinking. Buffy was crying! Faith shot up out of her chair and kneeled before the small blond. Buffy was crying about something, but her deafening moans of sorrow were incomprehensible. Faith put her hands on the girl's knees, trying to look into Buffy's eyes. This was an unattainable task, as the younger Slayer had her face covered by her hands (making her cries even less explicable).
In one quick move Faith had her arms wrapped around Buffy. She lifted her up and carried her back out into the library. Faith sat down in a chair, placing Buffy in her lap, her arms still tightly enveloped around her fellow Slayer. But the small girl still cried. Faith didn't know what to do, but she wanted nothing more than to make Buffy happy again.
"Hey," Faith whispered into the blonde's ear, "It's okay. It's okay!" Faith rubbed her hands gently over the crying girl's back, "Don't worry, you're not going anywhere. It's all right. You have a whole life here, family, friends, and two whole Watchers all to yourself." Faith tried to make Buffy laugh, but it didn't work. "Look, B, it's gonna be okay! You'll see. Giles only said maybe, and that's a slim chance of the maybe-sorta-kinda-not-really variety. Just you wait, when this is all over and everything's fine you're gonna feel really stupid that you cried over something so small." Buffy's sobs had lessened, but they had not gone away entirely.
"Besides," Faith said, now that she had really given the situation thought. "If they're gonna move anyone, it's gonna be me." At that Buffy's wails of pain erupted to vociferous howls.
"NO!" Buffy screamed, "They can't take you away! They can't do that!" then her cries returned to shouted sobs.
"Hey," Faith said, getting worried about the girl screaming herself horse, "Don't worry! Look at me! I'm the one they'd move, and look how calm I am." Faith wasn't really calm, but right now she'd swear to god that she was Queen Elizabeth if it'd get Buffy to stop crying. "And like you said," Faith gave Buffy a tight hug and a kiss on the top of the head, "We're the Slayers, and they're the watchers, without us they're nothing! It's you and me B. Us against the world . . ." she noticed that Buffy had stopped her bawling, so she reached down, and took her by the chin. The blonde's makeup was a little runny, and she had tears still rolling down her cheeks. She had never looked cuter in Faith's eyes. "And you know what?" she asked, reaching up to wipe away the girl's tears, "We're gonna win."
Buffy gave a small smile and hugged Faith tightly to herself, whispering a quiet "Thank You". The fears of the two Slayers may have been contained, but for the two Watchers (who had just witnessed the entire interaction through Giles' office window) the fear was just beginning. . . .
= = = (* Telling The Slayerettes*) = = =
Later, that afternoon, the two slayers walked back into the library with their arms over each other's shoulders. Once they had stopped talking amongst themselves they noticed the two exhausted looking watchers waiting for the rest of the Scoobies. Buffy looked at Faith in a pleading way. They had talked later that morning after Buffy had cried. Faith had brought up the fact that she didn't want to be the one to actually tell the Scooby Gang about what had happened. Buffy said she didn't want to do it either. So as Faith walked Buffy to homeroom they talked about meeting in the library early to ask Giles to do it. Buffy had decided that Faith should do the actual asking.
"Hey, Giles?" Faith started slowly, "Can I talk to you for a second in your office?" Faith's voice betrayed her nervousness.
"Certainly." He walked ahead of Faith, leading the way. The brunette looked back at her fellow Slayer. Buffy nodded at her encouragingly.
"Okay, there are a few things I need to talk to you about." Faith said, once she had closed the door behind her.
"What is it?" Giles asked, as matter-of-fact as ever.
"Well, the first thing I wanted to ask you was . . ." Faith paused, she didn't know how this would sound to the old watcher. She knew that Buffy was his surrogate daughter, and this was a strange question to ask.
"Yes?"
"The next time you drop a bomb like that on B, would you at least tell me first?" Faith rushed out quickly.
"I beg your pardon?" Giles actually looked confused, and he wasn't even using the computer.
"You saw what happened this morning, right?"
"Yes," Giles answered slowly, "In a manor of speaking-"
"Then you saw how she reacted!" Faith was upset, Giles could tell, but she wasn't angry.
"Look-"
"Hey," Faith said, a little more composed, "Look, I'm sorry. But I don't wanna see B upset like that. I was just wondering . . . as a personal favor, could you maybe come and talk to me about that kind of thing first? Then maybe you and I could figure out a way to tell her. That way she doesn't get so upset, like she did this morning?"
Giles gave a small smile. He knew that Faith cared about Buffy, and he was happy for it. He had read the young Slayer's file as soon as it had been sent. Faith needed people she could trust, and the fact that she was looking out for Buffy during such a hard time in their lives was a very good sign.
"Certainly. Perhaps . . . that would be best. You did seem to have a certain finesse when it came to calming her this morning." Giles noticed Faith blush slightly, thus triggering a new thought in the watcher's mind: Maybe she's not looking out for her friend . . .'
"Anyways!" Faith said quickly, trying to stay away for the topic of this morning, "There was another thing that me and B wanted to ask you. And this one is kinda big . . ." Giles looked apprehensive.
"What is it?" he asked sternly, as though afraid of the answer.
"We know that it's not really your place to do this," Faith started slowly, wanting to get it right. "But we were wondering if maybe, when the Scoobs come for the afternoon meeting . . . if maybe . . . . . You'd tell them about what's going on" Faith pinched her eyes shut tight.
Giles noticed the change in Faith's features as she finished. It was the way someone looked when they knew they were going to get hit. She was anticipating pain. This worried the Watcher to no end as he cleared his throat. He watched Faith open an apprehensive eye, as though anticipating a trick.
"I will, but I would like to know why." The librarian said quietly.
"Well, lots of reasons." Faith said slowly, as though it was obvious. "I don't know them very well, so I don't know how they'll take it if they hear it from me. Buffy is too emotional right now to tell all her friends that she's involved in a murder, whether it's accidental or not. Plus, you have all the facts and the Counsel put you in charge of investigations! You were the obvious choice." She knew she had him, but she still wanted to grease the wheels, "Besides! They all see you as 'The Great Learned One' with all the answers and an endless card catalog of books about demons in your head. From me it'll seem like an excuse to not like me further, from Buffy it'll sound like she's looking for pity, but from you it'll sound like fact."
"I see." Giles took off his glasses an wiped them, "And you both decided this when?"
"This morning."
"Ah. Yes. I should have guessed." Giles put his glasses back on as there was a knock at the door. Buffy poked her head in hesitantly.
"Did you ask?" Faith nodded. "Did he say yes?" Another nod form the brunette.
"You know," the old Watcher said dryly, "I AM standing right here." Buffy blushed and smiled.
"The Slayeretts are starting to arrive." Buffy said nervously, "We should probably take our seats." The two slayers and the old watcher walked out of the office and over to the table where Wesley sat. The only other person there was Xander who was obviously early because he skipped class, but the others were due any minute. They slowly filed their way into the library over the next 10 or so minutes until the whole crew was set and in place.
'Here goes nothing' both the slayers thought.
CHAPTER 4: Stop Acting & Start Being
= = = (*I'd Like To Thank The Academy…*) = = =
Faith sat down next to Buffy and waited for the other Scoobys to arrive. Wesley arrived shortly after Faith left Giles' office, closely followed by Oz. Cordelia arrived complaining about a meeting with her English professor, then standing next Wesley as they made googly-eyes at each-other.
Willow had yet to arrive, and the tension was building in the room. Faith was drawing on one of her boots with a sharpie when she looked over at Buffy. Her hands were trembling violently. 'She's shaking like a leaf!' Faith thought. She reached over and took Buffy's hand. The small blond looked up, receiving a comforting smile from Faith. Buffy gave the brunette's hand a squeeze just as Willow walked in.
"Sorry I'm late!" the young witch called as she ran in, quickly taking a seat. She looked around impatiently, her eyes traveling from Slayers to Watchers and back again. "Out With It Already!!"
"Um, yes, well." Giles cleared his throat, looking at the Slayers' joined hands then back to the group, "I assume that you are all aware that a few nights ago an event occurred that may directly effect all of us." He then took off his glasses and looked at them as he continued. "I regret to inform you that there has been a terrible accident, and that a life has been taken. Now, as has happened before, a human lies dead at the hands of a Slayer."
Xander's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, Cordelia bowed her head in shock, and Oz's eyebrows became one. The most extreme reaction however, came from Willow, who fainted and slipped out of her chair. Her body made a dull 'Flump' as it hit the Library floor. Oz quickly reached down and picked her up. He gently tapped her face until she blinked back to consciousness.
"Pleases tell me I dreamed that?" she whispered so quietly only the slayers could hear. They dropped their clasped hands, and looked away.
"What do you mean when you say that this has happened before?" Xander asked quietly.
"It is not uncommon for accidents of this kind to occur. Slayers have powers and capabilities that humans do not, and like humans each Slayer is unique. Some are born with strength greater than most in their breed, but their mental discipline will be low. Or they will have a high susceptibility to Slayer-Dreams but they don't heal quickly. Some have heightened human senses, but will have trouble with their Slayer-sense for detecting Vampires." Giles put his glasses back on, looking a bit awkward.
"Every Slayer has one power they are exceptionally good at, and one that's a little below normal for their kind. It's not their fault. But when you live and die to fight evil, and you have a weakness, it's going to have constituencies." The librarian finished slowly.
"How often does this happen?" Willow asked carefully.
"The average is approximately one human death per Slayer." Wesley replied sadly, "But that's just the average. The Slayer that lived during the boxer rebellion had terrible Slayer-Senses and killed four humans in her reign. She holds the record."
"How could this happen?" Xander asked the old Watcher.
"Um . . ." Faith started slowly, "I guess we could show you?" The room nodded. She took Buffy's hand and led her to the open area near the counter.
She then got up and took Willow's hand, then Xander's, followed by Wesley's. She made Xander stand by the counter, Willow across from him near the Card-Catalog, and Wesley she placed near the door to the bookcase. She took Buffy's hand and led her back towards the doors to the library.
"It kinda went like this." Faith said, pulling out a stake for her self and another one for Buffy. "We started walking down this alley, and I could tell there were some vamps near by," she motioned for Buffy and her to start walking forward slowly, "When all of a sudden, a Vamp pops out." She waves to Xander to walk forward and he complies "So I stake him," she pokes him in the chest with the dull end of the stake, "And he turns to dust."
"Then," Buffy says walking forward, waving to Willow, "Another Vamp pops out," she pokes Willow with the dull end of her stake, "And he turns to dust."
"But before the Nasty goes 'Poof', this guy pops out," Faith says, pointing to Wesley, who steps forward to where Faith is standing, "and since I can still detect Vamp nearby cause of the guy B's dealing with, I think Wesley's a Vamp too." Faith bows her head. "By the time B's done with that guy I'm already swinging my arm back. At the last second Buffy yelled 'NO!', but it was too late. By the time I heard what she said he was gone." Faith's voice broke slightly with that last sentence. She cleared her throat, and looked up. "That's how it happened."
"It could have just as easily have been me." Buffy said, putting an arm around Faith shoulder. "Now you know." She said, looking pointedly at Willow. The room remained silent for several minutes afterwards.
"The Counsel has placed me in charge of investigations, and the body was taken to London to be autopsied." Giles stated dryly, "They have reviewed the testimonies and so far see no need for a trial to take place. No punishments have been dealt yet, though they have considered some . . ." Both the slayers bowed their heads as they headed back to their seats.
"What?" The fountain of words that was Oz inquired.
"They have considered removing a slayer from the Hellmouth." This statement was shortly fallowed by gasps of shock. "Just one, and it's only a small chance."
"Here's the question no one wants to ask," Cordelia said in her usual tone, "Which one?" All eyes turned to the Slayers.
"That's classified." Wesley snapped.
"Buffy." Giles stated quietly.
"WHAT?!" Faith yelled, jumping from her chair, "THAT'S NOT FAIR! She's got a whole life here!!"
"I know." Giles said loudly, "That's the problem! A Slayer is supposed to be isolated. She's not supposed to have friends, she not supposed to live with family and she is not supposed to be a daughter to her Watcher!" The room fell silent. "That's why they chose her Faith. She's not supposed to divulge her identity to people, and yet all these people know." Giles indicated to all the people in the library, "She will have no more contact with me, as I am to stay here and continue to be a librarian, and that way the Slayers can cover more ground when you are in two different places."
"That's why I get to stay?" Faith said, her tone full of loathing, "Cause I ain't got no here for me? No friends, no Watcher, and no place to go." Faith sat down heavily.
"They have decided not to, but should another event like this one occur they WILL send Buffy away."
The room fell silent, every person in the room thinking over all the information they were just fed, and now had to digest. No one liked the plan, and no one wanted to see Buffy go.
"Well I've got a plan," Xander said, in his joking tone, "Don't let it happen again." He smiled his big, fake smile and got up to leave the library. Willow got up to, telling Buffy that she'd call her later as Oz followed her out. Giles and Wesley went into the old Watcher's office as Cordelia picked up her bag of cheerleading gear and headed off to practice.
Faith suddenly realized that Buffy hadn't said a word since she found out about her possible re-location. When she peered over to look at the blond she saw a look of shock on the girl's face. 'I'm gonna kill him!' was the only thought running through Faith's head as she glared at the old librarian through the window of his office. He must have felt her penetrating gaze because he caught her eye for a moment before quickly looking away.
"Come on," Faith said, taking Buffy's hand and pulling her out of the chair. "Let's get you home."
"I want to go slaying." She said, almost dreamily.
"Okay B, what ever you want to do is okay by me." Faith slowly walked Buffy out of the library as they made their way to one of Sunnydale's cemeteries.
= = = (*Intimacy Issues*) = = =
Faith was worried. She'd never seen Buffy like this; isolated, preoccupied, and emotionless. She put her arm around the little blond as the walked out of the school. The sky had grown dark, and the city was alive with evils.
"What cemetery do you want to go to B?" Faith asked the little Slayer quietly.
"Which ever has the most action I guess." Was Buffy's monotone response.
"Look, B, I don't know about this." Faith said, holding the older girl more tightly, "I don't know if you should be slaying this way. I'm not gonna stop you, but I just wanna say that I ain't so sure about this."
"I'm fine."
"I'm not letting you go alone, that's for sure." Buffy smiled up at Faith, the first emotion she had shown since they had told the Super Friends what had happened.
"Thanks for looking out for me."
"No problem B. Like you said, it's just you and me in this world . . ." Faith smiled back, " . . . and from here, that doesn't look so bad." Buffy blushed a little, which made Faith's smile widen.
"Why don't we head to Shady Acers, they've been busy lately?" Buffy suggested.
"Sounds good to me!" Faith pulled a stake out and started twirling it like a drummer.
They sauntered along the sidewalk, each wondering what the other's thoughts were, when they both felt that familiar tickle. The feeling of hairs standing on end, and the vague hum in the back of their minds that whispered '…Vampire…'
Buffy felt Faith stiffen, and hold her more tightly. She could feel it was close, but couldn't sense a direction. They both sped up, gripping their stakes firmly as they continued down the path. The creature didn't follow. Wherever it was, it didn't want to feed or be found. It simply watched. This unnerved Buffy, she reached up, and put her free hand over the one Faith had resting on her shoulder.
"Why isn't it following us?" Faith whispered.
"I dunno, but if it isn't bothering us let's just let it go."
They walked into the cemetery, towards the fresh graves. Buffy took a seat on one of the tomb-stones, while Faith leaned against a nearby mausoleum. The brunette observed her partner more closely, reading the delicate facial features and subtle body-language. Faith smirked, 'I can read her like a book!' she thought.
"They still love you, you know?" Faith said, as though they had been in the middle of a conversation. Buffy stopped swinging her feet to look at the younger slayer.
"What?" Buffy asked, playing dumb.
"Your friends. They still love you. I admit, I don't know them very well, but I do know you," She smiled at the petite blond, "And they wouldn't be your friends if you weren't positive their love was unconditional." Buffy smiled a sad smile, and looked back at her feet, which started swinging again.
"I hope you're right." She whispered. Faith got up and walked behind Buffy, gently hugging her around the middle.
"They just need time to adjust," she whispered in the older girl's ear, "It's a lot to take in. They don't know what to do, or what to think." Faith suddenly realized how intimate she was being with blond and pulled away. "Just look what I did! I panicked. But Willow, she's a really levelheaded girl, she'll understand. I bet by the time we get home there'll be a message from her on your machine. Xander will make jokes to cover up his insecurities, like always, and in a few days time he'll be drooling over you as if nothing ever changed."
"You really think so?" she asked, sounding slightly hopeful.
"B! I know so. They'll be worried about you, not mad at you!" Faith sighed. "It must be nice, you know? To have someone care about you that much . . ."
"You should know," Buffy said, giving her a pointed smile, "I don't think I could be concerned about you anymore with out getting on your nerves."
"Some times you do!" Faith said Laughing. Buffy burst out laughing too, followed by an indignant 'HEY!', followed by more giggles. Both stopped laughing and looked at one another, smiling broadly.
"Oh!" Faith said excitedly as an undead hand popped out of the ground, "Looks like we've got company."
"You want this one?" Buffy asked.
"Sure. Why don't you take that one over there and wait for him to wake-up?" Faith said, indicating to a fresh grave a few rows back. Buffy walked over to it, and sat on the head-stone.
The fights were short and simple, both the vamps dusting after a few blows, neither Slayer being on the receiving end of them. Soon, more had awoken, and they took them out one by one. All of them fledglings, and all easy kills. There were 7 total, Faith won the tiebreaker with a swift kick to the guys head. It came flying off and bust into dust as it hit a tree trunk.
When they walked home Buffy had her arm around Faith's waist as they headed for 1630 Rovello Drive. Once they had grabbed a snack, and headed up stairs, Faith went to take her shower.
The light on her answering machine was blinking, so she pressed it. Willow's voice called through the speaker, asking Buffy to call `cause she was worried and wanted to make sure that she was okay.
'Faith was right.'
= = = (*The Buffy Monopoly*) = = =
Faith walked out of the bathroom, towel drying her long brown hair, when she heard Buffy talking in her room. After stopping outside the door to listen she could tell that the blond must be talking to Willow. She only caught a few seconds of the conversation before Buffy hung up giggling. There was dead silence in the room for a few seconds. Faith pressed her ear to the door, listening intently.
If it weren't for Faith's Super-Slayer-Reflexes, she would have ended up face down on the floor. Buffy had swiftly pulled the door open knowing that Faith was on the other side, and the brunette had just enough time to put her arms out and fall on to the blond instead. Buffy was in the middle of a fit of giggles before she realized she was on the floor with Faith on top of her in nothing more than a towel.
Faith started laughing herself, though more because she was nervous. Not just because of the towel-half-naked-on-the-floor- thing, but also because she had been caught listening in on her crush/roommate's phone call. She didn't know how Buffy would react to that, but took the blonde's laughing as a good sign. She quickly got up, careful to keep the towel around her, and headed to her bag to get clothes.
"So what did you and Red talk about?" she asked, making a point to keep her back towards the older girl.
"If you know enough to know that it was Willow, then you must know what we were talking about." She said in a mocking voice.
"I kinda caught the Good-byes." Faith said, guilt evident in her voice. Buffy thought she sounded cute.
"She wanted to make sure we were okay." She said, smiling at Faith, "she also wanted to ask me a few things."
"WE?" Faith asked skeptically, "You mean YOU, B. She doesn't give a damn about me." With that Faith went to change in the bathroom, but stopped when Buffy put her hand on Faith's arm.
"No, Faith. I meant WE. She was really concerned about you. She wanted to know if you'd want to talk to her about it, since she's kinda the 'Scooby Therapist'." She smiled at the younger girl and gave her arm a squeeze, "They care about you Faith, I hope you know that." With that she let got of Faith's arm so she could change.
Buffy went over to her desk and took out her books and binders, getting ready to do work. She knew Faith was serious when she said she'd force her to do her work.
Faith came back to the room in a pair of sweat-shorts and a t- shirt. 'How can she make that look so sexy?' Buffy wondered.
"So what did you and the Wicked Witch talk about?" Faith asked pulling out her Slayer Diary and a pen.
'You mainly' was what Buffy wanted to say (as it was the truth), but decided on "School stuff. She wanted to ask me a few things." With that Buffy turned to face Faith.
"Is it just me, or did the sky just fall?" Faith said laughing, "Since when does Red get homework help from you?"
"Not that kinda school stuff." Buffy retorted, smiling, "She and I haven't really gotten to hang out recently, you know? What with you moving in and all. She was wondering when she and I could get together tomorrow." Faith's face fell. She liked Willow, but she liked hanging out with Buffy a lot more. She could understand how Red might want the Buff-ster all to her lonesome, but that meant less time for Faith.
"Which reminds me, I want to know what's on your agenda so I can plan mine." Buffy looked at her as if to tell her that she came first in the matter of Faith Vs. Willow.
"Uh . . . nothing really. Feel free to mess with it."
"Okay, but first I wanted to ask you something . . ." Buffy got up and moved to sit on the bed next to Faith. "If you go Slaying, and I'm not there, will you promise not to go to a busy cemetery?" Buffy gently took the younger girl's hand in her and squeezed it lightly. Faith was so moved by Buffy's concern that she actually wanted to say "YES" and mean it.
"You don't think I can take care of myself, is that it?" Faith asked emotionlessly.
"That's not it at all, Faith, and you know it. It's `cause I worry. I just want to be sure that you'll be okay." She smiled shyly at Faith.
"Why do you ask?" Faith looked apprehensive.
"I just found out from Willow that I have a huge History paper due the day after tomorrow. I was wondering if maybe I could leave the slaying to you that night so I could write it?"
"Sure, whatever you need is okay by me B." 'Slaying just won't be the same without you though.'
"Okay, then here's the plan that I think might work: I go to school with you in the morning, and I spend Homeroom and Lunch with Willow (that's killing two birds with one stone, cause she can help me with my paper), then I can stay after school a bit and train with you for a while, then you can go and get down with your bad-Slayer- self while I glue my forehead to the computer screen. How does that sound?"
"Sound like you got it all worked out." Faith tried to look happy, but she was gonna miss having lunch with Buffy and she wanted to go out and have a good Slay with the little blonde.
"All that's left is your assurance that you won't go out and get in over your head . . ."
"Fine." Faith said flatly, "I'll go and check out the parks. They've been quiet lately. Happy now?"
"Very!" the older slayer said, jumping up and going back to her work on her Othello reading. Faith shook her head smiling, and opened her Journal.
= = = (*The Second First-Person*) = = =
Dear Slayer-Diaries,
LIFE IS GOOD! I know I shouldn't be saying that, as today had to be one of the hardest and longest of my life . . . but from where I'm sitting, it doesn't seem so bad. Let me give you a view from my perspective, shall we?
I'm a Girl who's had a short but hard life. I find out I'm a Slayer, I do my job, my boss gets killed . . . and I ran away from my problems (which eventually found me). But here I am, after my 180- twist SITTING ON BUFFY SUMMERS' BED! I killed a man, and I found a soul mate.
Wait! No! Scratch that! I don't believe in God, so there's no such thing as a soul . . . but if I did believe in it, then yeah. She would be mine.
This is the way I've always thought about it (even before I met her): As a Slayer, I have always felt incomplete. Like there was a part of me that had to be taken away in order to make room for what ever is required to be a Slayer, and I never thought I could feel whole. But then, I met this girl: About Five-Foot-Two, Bottle Blond, Hazel Eyes, and the poster child for "Goody-2-shoes" kids (minus the fact that she had sex with her boy-friend who later tried to end the world, and the fact that she is also a Slayer). But there's something inside her, that radiates off her like heat off a flame . . . and it makes me feel whole. It makes the pain go away, and life seems so much better when she's around.
I know I don't know what love is from experience, but I have read about it. They say that your knees go weak and your hands start to shake. Poets always talk about how a simple smile can cause a heart to stop beating or how a single word can speak volumes of how they feel. Writers talk about how a time can seem altered when you're around people in love.
This is what I feel. And if all that is true, then love is what I am drowning in. When she put her arm around my shoulder to comfort me, my legs turn to Jell-O, and I babble like an idiot. When she walks into a room the world just fades away and all I can see is her beauty, grace and agility. Every smile from her lips is another step closer to my grave because it makes my heart stop beating and my lungs can't think to breathe.
It's like that poem by Blake:
"TO SEE A WORLD IN A GRAIN OF SAND,
AND HEAVEN IN A WILD FLOWER,
HOLD INFINITY IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND,
AND AN ETERNITY IN AN HOUR"
She's so small (just one person), yet she mean so much to this world. People see her every day and yet they don't see how deep her beauty runs. She can make the world melt away and all I want to do is be there with her when it happens. Yeah, I'm in love. And, yeah, I know what that means. I LOVE BUFFY SUMMERS; even though she's a girl, and even though she's straight, and yes I AM aware of the fact that she has a boyfriend . . . but I don't care.
I know she's happy and I know that I wouldn't do anything to change that. I guess I really have grown up. I have been known to be selfish and short-sited, but look at me now: all dressed up in Big Sis' clothes. I know being with Buffy would make me Happy, but I would trade the happiness she has right now for anything (even if it means my misery).
A lot happened today. I woke up, my face a mere inches away from Buffy's, and all I could do was marvel at life and the sharp turns it likes to take to throw me off. Never in a million years did I think that I'd wake up to sheets smelling of Buffy Summers, and incentive to go to school. I spent about 20 minutes watching her sleep, enjoying that smile on her face, before I too fell back into unconsciousness.
My second awakening was a little less enjoyable. Buffy pulled the sheets off me suddenly, and told me to get my rear in gear so I could tell all of her friends that I'm responsible for killing someone. That was the reality of the situation, but somehow she made it sound a lot better (I actually wanted to go to school with her {it's probably the WITH HER part that was the incentive . . .}). We walked to school and we talked about all kinds of stuff on the way.
GREAT NEWS: Angel's a dud in the sack according to Buffy! That thought will get me through the hard times, no matter how bleak they seem! I also accidentally told her that I slept with Xander . . . she looked almost hurt when I told her that. I think she was having sympathy pains or something. She didn't seem to happy about it, though she did laugh at my joke about the X-Man's . . . 'short- comings', so to speak! I am so glad I told her though; I don't like to keep secrets.
Then we got some bad news about the Counsel, and how they might make Buffy move out of Sunnydale because people love her or something . . . she burst into tears! I picked her up and carried her over to a chair and I got to calm her down. I wanted to do it! Giles, though he is like her father, can be a little harsh at times. I told her that I wouldn't leave her (which is true), and I told her that she and I are going to make an unstoppable team (but that's already true).
When we told the group, they didn't take it so well. Oz actually changed facial expressions! I actually saw him furrow his brow . . . Willow fainted and Xander made some crack about not letting me kill anymore people . . . little jerk! . . . never mind. Buffy stood by me though, and after that we went out Slaying.
The weirdest thing happened! We were walking out to the cemetery, and we could both sense that a Vamp was watching us. Why would a Vamp not go after two Slayers? It was unnerving. Then when we left it was gone. Maybe it was one of the 7 we staked while hunting between the tombstones. I hope he was, CREEP!
Then there was this whole thing when we got home. I took a shower and Buffy found me listening in on a phone call she was having with Willow, and one thing led to another and I was on-top of her in nothing more than a towel . . . ! ANYWAYS: she told me that Willow was concerned about me, and that the Scoobys care about me. Then she did something really weird. She sat down next to me, taking my hand, and told me that she cares about me.
DOES SHE HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT SHE'S SAYING??? DOESN'T SHE REALIZE WHAT SHE'S DOING TO ME??? FOR CHRIST's SAKE! Then she went on to talk about how she didn't want me to go Slaying alone to any of the busy grave-yards because she worries about me being okay and because she wants to know that I'm safe!!! God I hope she doesn't see me as a little sister . . .
I had better go, Buffy's finished her required Homework Quota in order to be allowed into her own bed . . .
~Faith
PS: Buffy is beautiful even when she cries.
...to be continued...